Oh my bloody sis has a death wish I SWEAR. Spent today clearing my living room of all the christmas stuff, by my non existent standards it was immaculate, fireplace was cleared and polished, floor mopped and a bin bag full of shite binned. I even went through the magazine rack ffs AND all the bits like odds and ends of clothes, hair stuff etc were in there rightful place.
It was THAT tidy I even opened the blinds ffs AND I had candles lit, so it smelt nice.
( It also meant she couldn't do her usual 'what's that smell thing she does, making me feel uncomfortable in my own house )
SHE walked in ( she of the huge house with only her husband and no kids, SHE who makes us sit in the dining room when we visit, SHE who chased the kids with a sweeping brush when the silly string came out at dds party )
And she said ' what ave you been doing all day Jue ? i've been cleaning the house all day, you could do with getting in here sorted out you know.
'What's wrong with it ?' Says I. , icicles gathering on my eyeballs. 'What would you improve ?'
She stood there rabbit caught in the headlights stylee obviously thinking 'oh fuck'
'The skirting boards', she says, 'have you cleaned your skirting boards' ?
'Yes' I growl, 'I hoovered them, is there a problem with that ?'
'Oh, was just asking narky' says she. ( doing her usual thing she does after being an arse, putting it in the victims shoulders god forbid they react negatively )
There is fuck all wrong with my skirting boards.
That may sound like an overeaction, but believe me it's one of a million putdowns, grrrr, why do some people have to pick the tiniest fecking fault ?
I thank you