to leave dd asleep in her cot

[Rhubarbgarden]

while I nip to the hospital to collect my friend after her op?

I'm pretty sure I won't do this in the end but I'm curious to see if others would be tempted or if it is as big a no no as I think.

I live over the road from a hospital. Friends are always using our drive to park in when they have hospital appointments. I'm happy to help them avoid the high parking charges.

One particular friend has regular appointments there and has had a series of quite major knee operations. She always comes to visit before or after and it's a great excuse to catch up as she lives some distance away.

She's having a relatively minor op this morning to remove pins, and as she had to be there very early this morning she stayed here overnight last night. Now although I say relatively minor, it's under GA and when she checked in first thing they told her she must be collected by someone afterwards and even though it's only 5 mins walk to this house, they won't let her leave on her own.

Obviously I'm happy to go and pick her up; the only snag is that this is likely to coincide with dd's lunchtime nap. Dd is clockwork in her naps and is highly unlikely to wake up during the 2 hours she's down. On the rare occasions she does, she just babbles to herself and plays with her toys till I go get her. I usually finish what I'm doing first.

So would it really be bad parenting to leave her asleep in her cot while I dash to the hospital and back to collect my friend? I would only be gone ten mins. Really truly?

A neighbour left a baby in the house the other day. A health visitor called to see her and heard baby. Called Police. 7 police cars and 2 ambulances arrived. Mother arrested. Baby taken to hospital, other child collected from school bypolice and taken to hospital to be checked. Mother taken to hospital to be checked over I assume for PND. Not her best decision and not something I would want to happen to me!

Why can't she just wait until nap is over?

have your friend wait in hospital until baby has finished nap. simple.

she can wait til u can go get her with toddler in tow.

you certainly dont need to rush over there as soon as she given go ahead to leave.
she is an adult who can easily wait around.

a lot of things interfere with my baby's lunchtime nap, hey ho life goes on and baby has to fit in. his routine is important but not that important.

Hospitals have cafes and many wards will have a day room/waiting area.

Friend can sit in cafe/stay on ward until baby is awake then you can go and pick up friend.

I am pretty chilled out re leaving babies in cars etc but not going out like that. It's very unlikely to be 10 minutes, especially given your friend will have had a GA and be on crutches so unable to walk easily.

Isn't it illegal or something? Like, in the extremely unlikely event something happened, you would be legally liable for leaving a child in an unsafe situation? Might be wrong, but I thought it was against the law.

I've been tempted a few times to do this when dd2 needs picking up from nursery, i can see the school from my door and i would be at most 5 mins. But i never have. If dd3 is asleep when i need to go out she gets woken up. Or on one occasion she wasnt well and needed her sleep and i asked my next door neighbour if she'd sit in the house for the 5 mins i'd be out.

YABU...you just have to wake her up

I wouldn't do it. I'm sure your friend would wait. There'll be a coffee shop or something. And / or put your LO down earlier.

The thought that would terrify me is if I got knocked down or something on the way and taken to hospital unconscious, nobody knowing about the lo at home.

Mind you, I feel the same about taking the trolley back to the trolley bay after supermarket shopping, with the kids in the car . Seriously though, I wouldn't leave a baby home alone.

I am bamboozled that you would even consider this to be an option.

Yes, you could go and it would all be OK but there are numerous possibilities of things that could go wrong.

It's just not worth the risk.

Either make your friend wait or interrupt your DD's nap. Neither is a big deal.

I'm with Abirdinthehand I believe it's against the law and constitues neglect under "Inadequate supervision"

I could be wrong here, but I wouldn't chance it

I wouldn't do it but I can't believe some people are suggesting that she make her friend wait in the hospital until her DD wakes up

A baby's nap doesn't take precedence over a waiting adult! Any kind, but especially a good friend who has just had surgery and is waiting about in an unpleasant place unable to leave by herself!

What I would have done when DD was that age is put her to sleep on my back for her nap, then I could go wherever I liked and do whatever I wanted, and she'd still have her sleep.

Failing that I'd have woken her and put her on my back and she'd probably have gone off again. But I know not all babies will do that.

But for me, if we need to go somewhere/do something, or even if I just want to, bundle the baby and off we go, whether they are sleeping, whether they wake up or not. I always had something with me she could sleep in if she wanted. I would never break an engagement or appointment or promise because the baby happened to be sleeping. That's madness to me!

Why don't you pop to the shop and pick up the bread and milk you need while you're at it

I wouldn't assume that something awful would happen if I left a baby for 5 mins, BUT, my default thing I ask myself is always "what if there was a fire?"

So, I would nip to the end of the street to post a letter while ds watched telly now because he knows that if the smoke alarm goes off, he goes outside and waits at the garden gate, or rings the neighbours doorbell.
I think at 5, this is OK, but a baby is totally helpless.

Wake the baby FGS! You can't live your life around a babies naps! Where will it all end?

Can you not put her down for her nap in the pushchair in the house, then just wheel her out when you are ready to go? .I know the weather is bad but with a blanket/ cosytoes and a rain cover she will be fine.

No way! Does your friend really expect you to leave your baby in the house alone so she doesn't have to sit in the hospital and read a mag until she wakes? That's not a friend imo.
It may be very unlikely that anything would happen but a fire can engulf a house in minutes. Far more likely is that your child, who never wakes, will wake this time and be distressed until you get back, or there will be some unforseen hold up. Not worth it imo.

MsEltoeAndWhine. I would be more than happy to wait in this situation. Is is the friend who has no-one else to pick her up and needs the favour. When I need a favour from someone I try to inconvenience them as little as possible.
Having said that I would sooner wake the baby than leave them home alone.

how old is your dd?

Your friend can either wait for your DD to wake up or you take your DD with and if she wakes up, then so be it. if you can't do anything ever for 2 hours in the middle of the day, your life is going to get trickier and trickier

them sort of thoughts always go through your head, but when it comes to it you know you always take them with you. I always do unless my mum can take him while i go do whatever, like post a letter, aout ten mins walk. Hopefully your daughter will be awake. x

There's nothing wrong with asking friend to wait until DD's nap is over. Chances are that friend won't be ready when hospital say she will be. DM never was when I went to pick her up. Sometimes they said she would be ready in the morning so I went to pick her up at 10 and she wasn't ready until 5pm. So, OP, I would wait until friend rings you and tells you she is absolutely and completely ready for you to come and get her.

Have to say, that being from the slightly negligent school of parenting, I have left a DC asleep in a cot on a regular nap and ran up the road to the corner shop or to get another DC from pre-school. I did a risk assessment and, like Hopeforthe Best, decided that I could take that risk. Nothing ever happened.

The outrage on this thread is hilarious.

There were a couple of errands I used to run whilst ds was asleep in his cot, although I lived on an estate so the whole area seemed like an extension of my backyard. I didn't cross roads though. Which is irrational but then most of us are pretty irrational when it comes to these things; as demonstrated by this thread

It's not at all irrational. It's er, whats that word? Oh yeah-illegal!

Hmm yeah I suppose irrational and responsible do sound quite similar....