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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to have a phobia of going on hoilday

26 replies

BlissfulMistletoe · 29/12/2011 22:07

i hear most of my friends talk about their hoildays, and i does sound fun.

anyhow, the thought of 1st booking a hoilday sends me with dread, sorting passports for children, medical insurance and thats before i have left the door...then there is getting to the airport, checking in, boarding a plane ect...then being on hoilday, what am i suposed to do.

i normally just go to butlins, only 2 hours drive and i know i can get home....but i want to go on hoilday where there is sunshine instead of rain ( my luck in life lol).

OP posts:

TheresASpareChairOverThere · 29/12/2011 22:09

Me too. Camping in Wales usually. Lovely. Absolutely detest international travel. Get sweaty just thinking about the faff.

pinktransit · 29/12/2011 22:21

YANBU. Although I do go on holiday, often on my own. I book them, pay for them, and then wonder what on earth I was thinking of..... :(

I hate flying, worry hugely about visas and stuff (what if I get lost, they won't let me have a visa, lose all my money, get on the wrong plane, anything else I can think of to worry about), get stressed beyond belief, and then love it when I get there :)

I go on solo traveller holidays (NOT singles holidays), and they are brilliant. Once you get to the airport at the other end you are looked after totally. So, it's only passport and booking in advance, and you really, really can't get booking in wrong. And once you're booked in, you can't get on the wrong plane - they won't let you :D
Once I get wherever I'm going, I wonder what on earth I was worried about....

suebfg · 29/12/2011 22:23

Is this a joke? If booking a holiday stresses you out, how do you get on in other areas of your life?

Ifancyashandy · 29/12/2011 22:25

I ADORE international travel! All the organising, booking, checking in, going to the Boarding Gate! I travel mostly on my own and I love being at the airport - I always feel like an international woman of mystery and not some madly grinning loon of a lady!

HamblesHandbag · 29/12/2011 22:32

agree with sue, er wow. you know you can't get on the wrong plane, right??

boarding a plane is really not that hard. Can you find a motorway, or get on a train??

Original poster

BlissfulMistletoe · 29/12/2011 22:40

i have never been close to an airport, sorry sue if this seems like a joke.

OP posts:

Ifancyashandy · 29/12/2011 23:33

It CAN seem overwhelming when you haven't done it before, but airports are actually very easy to negotiate - there are signs everywhere and lots if members of staff to ask.

And passports just require a form. Ditto visas.

Is there a particular aspect that scares you? Ask questions here and we'll break it down for you if you like?

MercyDulbottle · 29/12/2011 23:53

I hate it too, luckily we can't afford to do it too often. I am always afraid there will be something wrong with my documents, and we'll get turned back. Check passports constantly on route. HUGE anxieties about getting to airport / ferryport on time. this gets worse as I get older, and I can see a time where I just won't be able to book because the anxiety is too crushing. I got my family to a ferryport 6 hrs early this year.

completely mental emoticon .

OK when I get there, but UK holiday so easy and relaxing in comparison.

squeakytoy · 29/12/2011 23:57

I can imagine if you have never been then it could seem daunting, but it really really isnt! :)

Make a list of what needs to be done, by the time it needs to be done, put all the documents into a plastic zip folder.

Get a cab (and if necessary, stay at a travelodge by the airport the night before so that you have got plenty of time).

And get yourself to somewhere like Lanzarote, that isnt a big island, the transfer from the airport is very short, you are guaranteed sunshine all year round, and the people there are all very friendly and speak English too, so you wont feel completely overwhelmed.

Get booking!!! You wont regret it. :)

squeakytoy · 30/12/2011 00:00

Get a friend to help you book. You can usually book insurance (travel and medical inclusive) when you book your tickets.

Order your passports first. The post office will check the forms for you before sending them off, so you know that they have been completed properly.

Checking in at the airport is absolutely easy. You hand in your booking confirmation, and your luggage, and they give you your tickets to get on the plane. You go through security in minutes, and then you wander around the shop until the boards tell you to go to your boarding gate (the plane will not go without you and you have plenty of time to get to it!)

Original poster

BlissfulMistletoe · 30/12/2011 00:00

passports, my daugter always pulls faces, i don't have a single photo without her poking her tongue out, or making a funny face...how can i get a pass port for her.

how do i prepare my son ( has austim) about airport, that i know nothing about.

OP posts:

squeakytoy · 30/12/2011 00:02

How old is your son?

You can go to an airport for a walk around without going on a plane. You cant go past security, but you can go into the hall where all the check in desks are, and watch the planes.

Take the kids to a shop that does passport photos manually, most high streets will have one. They are very good at getting the shot right for you.

squeakytoy · 30/12/2011 00:03

I would say go with a friend or relative who has flown before. That will make it much easier and less stressfull for you.

Original poster

BlissfulMistletoe · 30/12/2011 00:06

son will soon be 6

OP posts:

MrsSeanBean · 30/12/2011 00:14

Yanbu. I hate travelling. With dc would be dreadful and my neuroticism would inflict a travel phobia on ds too.

henrythecat · 30/12/2011 00:18

YANBU - don't make it stressful for yourself. Why not just do something different in the UK? Have you though about something like featherdown farms?

(disclaimer: I have never been to one, am simply seduced by nice website, they might be crap)

Selks · 30/12/2011 00:22

It does seem daunting if you've never done it before, but it is ok, really it is.
First step - organise passports (most places won't need a visa but check to be sure when you know where you want to go)
Step two - choose and book holiday..,, just go into a travel agent, have a chat, bring home some brochures and see what you like the look of. Have a chat on here re destinations if you're not sure where you'd like to go.
Step 3 - get travel insurance. Easy peasy. Do it online or pick up a leaflet at tesco, asds etc.
Step 4 - go shopping for some holiday clothes etc... That is a fun part!
Step 5 - go on holiday. Get to the airport in plenty of time then look for the check in desk that is the right one for your flight ( it will say). Take your bags to the check in desk. The attendant will do all that is necessary. Once your bags are checked in you get given your boarding cards then you go through into the departure lounge and wait for your flight to be called.
Step 6 - enjoy the flight
Step 7 - collect your bags at the airport and join the coach or taxi to your hotel or whatnot.
That's the basics of how it happens!!
It's really not that hard. If you do it you will have loads of fun and feel really proud of yourself!

jasminerice · 30/12/2011 00:29

I feel the same these days, now that I have 2 DC's. Pre DC's I happily travelled the world, often alone, with my rucksack.

Since DC's, we tried a few international holidays, but I found it just too stressful, and last year we stayed in the UK, just a 1.5 hour drive from home, and I loved it. Was stress free. Will be doing exactly the same thing next year.

Just do what you feel comfortable with, don't look at other people, they're them and you're you.

Goolash · 30/12/2011 00:40

Fear of the unknown? Yanbu.

I love travelling but if you're not comfortable then plan early, get someone to sanity check what you need, maybe go with a big package company who'll give you a rep and contact. With the question of what will you do on holiday, think about your family and what they'll want. If you're used to and like Butlins then maybe a hotel / apartohotel with pool and evening entertainment may be the way to go. Or maybe a keycamp style holiday but I don't know how much help you get with flight to site transfers.

Slightlytinsellyexpat · 30/12/2011 01:03

OP, start with the passports.

Go to the post office and ask for passport forms for all of you.

Go to a photography shop where someone will take your photos. Somewhere like Max Spielman here does them without an appointment and will re-do them free if the photos are rejected by the Passport Office. Places like that are good with children too, because they have had loads of practice. There might not be one near you but there will be something similar.

Fill forms in, get a friend to look over them, use that same friend to witness them as well, take forms to post office where they can be rechecked (for an extra charge) and will be sent off.

Meanwhile, pick up some brochures from travel agent and start browsing.

Finally, go on holiday because you want the sunshine and the experience. Don't do it just because your friends do and you feel you ought to be able to do it too. It's your holiday, so do as you please.

Mrsrobertduvall · 30/12/2011 08:13

I know where you are coming from op.
DD can't do holidays due to OcD....we have tried, but it is hell on earth and a waste of money. So we can't go on holiday as a family, but take separate ones.
So holidays for me were very stressful...not just all the packing/preparation hassle, but what it was going to be like getting there and also being away from home.
On the plus side, we got fast tracked through everything due to a dr's note .......

KittyFane · 30/12/2011 08:39

Is this a joke? If booking a holiday stresses you out, how do you get on in other areas of your life?
???
YANBU, I hate it too.

mrsscoob · 30/12/2011 08:51

If I were you I would head to a travel agent, let them book it all for you. They can arrange the flights, accommodation, transfers and insurance, it will be a little more expensive but worth it for the peace of mind I think. Do you have a local airport you could fly from, rather than one of the big London ones? Thats going to be far less stressful. Passports, expensive but not that big a deal, fill them out post them off, just do it in plenty of time. I've been to Butlins, found it far more stressful as I had to drive and hate driving on the motorway, find going to somewhere like majorca much easier, it too is only 2 hours away and there a loads of things to do x

suebfg · 30/12/2011 17:17

But how can a holiday be stressful compared with let's see ... buying a house, getting married, starting a new job ...

The idea of going to Butlins would stress me out though ... maybe that's where you're going wrong

Primafacie · 30/12/2011 17:40

Well, a phobia is an irrational fear, so by definition you are being unreasonable (aka irrational). For lots of people travelling is an exceptional event, and therefore carries a significant amount of stress, but the more you do it the less stressful it becomes. Getting passports sorted is really not that difficult, and most countries don't require visas. Passport photos - they will take photos of your daughter for as long as it takes to get her not to make a face.

Once at the airport, the routine is always the same: get there, go to check in counter, drop your bags, cross security (you will probably need to take shoes and coats off and leave them on a tray to be x-rayed, once you've crossed security you gather your belongings, put your shoes back on and you are airside. It will look like a mall, with lots of duty free shops (unless flying from a really small airport) and some restaurants. Look for your gate number on the departure screens, when the gate opens go there with your children - if you are in a really large terminal, there will be signs at the airport stating how long the walk is likely to be to your gate. Once you get to your gate, there will be seats for you to wait until the flight boards. They will call families with young children before other passengers. You walk to the plane, get into your seats (make sure you are in the right ones) and off you go.

You can prepare your children with books - just search amazon for kid's books about travelling and being at the airport. There is lots in an airport to amuse children, and you should take treats you know they will enjoy (books, puzzles, sweets, whatever) and get a new one out at regular intervals.

I suggest you start with going to a resort that has lots of kids stuff, that will keep them entertained and shouldn't be too stressful.

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