To utterly hate those self appreciating, smug Christmas Round robbins

[pigletmania]

You know the ones that begin with "As another year draws to an end, I find myself sitting trying to find a few mins, to tell you how many wonderful holidays I have been on, and what gifted little children Jonny and Jane are blah blah blah, bahhhh humbug

My parents got one years ago that spent 3 sides of A4 wittering along about the 3 children and how wonderful they were, and then in the very last paragraph, said that the husband and wife had divorced during the year after 20 years of marriage...it was clearly written by the very bitter husband judging by the comments about the wife going off to the Caribbean with her new 'friend'!! It's still a legend in our family that gets talked about every year!

My mum gets one every year from the daughter of an old (dead) friend who has inherited the round robin crown from her mother. They are equally gross and boasting. I keep nagging my mum to do one along the lines of:

"This year has been particularly successul for K and M - the 'massage' business is raking it in. Obviously a recession is good for the soul! O has been pleasantly surprised that gun running and the illegal drugs cartel trade has been so brisk - who would have guessed?"

I am soooo jealous. I want some! I think these sound simultaneously lovely and horrifying and am now feeling horribly left out :(

Generally I think they're fine. But I used to get one that was over 50% an update on their relationship with Our Lord, as they used to say. They were making great progress every year.

phew
still not seen mine slagged off on here :-)

They're reading some corkers out on You and Yours right now!

OOOHHH
Just got my favourite Californian one that talks about running courses in succulent arranging and being president of the Newcomers Club
say what?

My friend gets one every year that goes into great detail about which plants bloom in which month of the year. Wtf?

We get only the one but I quite enjoy reading it. I read one my MIL got from family and it was very smug with lots of holidays, beautiful vistas and children's/grandchildren's achievements. It certainly would be hard to write without sounding very pleased with yourself. I think the only way to do it would be to keep it as realistic as possible. I don't really have anyone we could send one to as we manage to keep up with even quite far away friends at least once a year - more with most, and our family is only small and local.

I disagree about blogs being smug though. That's like saying "all books are rubbish". There are some very, very good blogs out there by people who do not write professionally.

I think even the ones that are done well are annoying. Either they're from people you haven't seen in years, in which case why do they think you're interested, or they're from people you know well, and whose news you already know and don't need to hear again, and you feel slightly hurt that they haven't bothered to write a personal letter. Also, in these days of computers, it's really easy to personalise a letter - just go into Word, take the basic letter, and add a few "I was so sorry to hear about your job" or "I hope your DS is happier at school now" or whatever. (Not that I do this, but I think it's a reasonable alternative if you can't be arsed to write fully personalised letters to 10 people.)

hackmum
most of those I receive or send are for family who live thousands of miles away
I choose not to let distance break the bonds
and yes, I do contact them in the interim but sending pictures for those without good internet gets expensive

But you could still send a proper letter, Talkin.

hackmum, I agree. Having arrived home this afternoon to find my second RR of this year, I found myself feeling depressed as I read it. There is not one aspect of the card or the letter that is specific to me or my DCs. The card doesn't have my name or the DCs name in it & there is no personal greeting of any description, just the signatures of the senders. The letter is not addressed to me either, it is addressed to "All" and it isn't signed. The letter refers to the parents in the third person and then lists out all the accomplishments of the DCs in the year gone by. There is then a paragraph about the pet & it is closed with the following: "Have to dash now. As you can tell, there is not a moment of spare time in this house. Here's to another equally successful 2012".
Wow!!!!! I see these friends a couple of times a year. I really didn't need this letter as I know what they are up to. I actually feel like our friendship is devalued from having received it, because I know they must have signed a batch load of cards, printed off a whole load of letters, packed & sealed them all & then stuck labels on the front of the envelope without any thought whatsoever about the person/people they were sending them to. Just another job done.

I could, but I choose to do a generic to one member of each arm of the family knowing that they are read aloud and shared over lunch, and they do the same in return and it works as when we do meet up we all recognise each other / the children / the pets / know the job status / the important stuff
urgent news - like a terrible death in the extended family this spring was covered by HUNDREDS of emails at the time

i get several round Robins and some are really enjoyable like each person saying a few lines about ther year highs and lows. The horrid ones that make my blood curdle are the rah rah parent who uses the round robin to self affirm what a wonderful family they are and every achievement, how ever boring is recorded for you. Including this year, how many fab tickets they have secured at various theatres and other venues and then a list of the entertainment they went to see. I really dont want to know how much you forked out and what uber seat you secured. Honest!!

RR letters have not died out despite the fact that the earlier thought about facebook replacing it. True some Fb users treat me to daily round robins - day to day account of all thier successes - rah rah; so I guess if there s one plus i can see with the printed annual version is its only once a year and I can reach some level of saddo enjoyment by ripping the ones from boasters and plonk in the recylcle bin

It's not something my family have ever done, but I love a good laugh at other people's. I find it's best if you don't know the protagonists.

It doesn't really qualify as a RR, but quite a smug note came yesterday for the previous occupants of this house, enclosed in a card with a fucking festive meerkat on the front. I'm glad they're not my friends. That would get them struck from my CC list.

The RR from my aunt was rather handy - stopped me putting the wrong children's names in cards to cousins.... oops- must pay more attention to which cousin names their baby what next year.

I just got one via email. Smug as hell, boring, over detailed and irrelevant. it's amazing. I once moved eight times in five years and this former uni chum from the distant past has still managed to track me down and bore me rigid.

If you want to read some real corkers try 'The Christmas Letters' by Simon Hoggart - he collected some awful ones and published them - it's hilarious and you don't feel alone it hating RRs and their smuggy smugness once you have reda these ones. Makes a great Christmas present too!

From my Methodist auntie and uncle:

"Trevor [their oldest son] is still single, but we are praying".

and from their equally religious daughter, talking about her husband:

"In the course of his work [as a building contractor] Bob takes every opportunity to chat with his workmen about spiritual matters. They are very curious, and we pray that they will all be saved".

that's brilliant lingle!

I want crazy round robins!

I get two RR's every year, from two friends I met when we were all pregnant with our first babies. We all now have 18-year-old sons (and various other younger ones).

What strikes me is the difference in style between the two RR's, e.g.
Friend 1 : DS did well in his A-levels and is enjoying studying at university.
Friend 2 : DS kept up the family tradition and got four A*'s in his A-levels! Maths, Further Maths, Physics and Chemistry! He started at Oxford in September and is regularly getting Firsts in all his assignments!

Both saying more or less the same thing, but only one being smug and boasty about it. Guess which friend I like the best?

lingle, the curious builders have made my day!

A good few years ago I got a round robin from a woman I used to know quite well. Her sister was my husbands OW so unsuprisingly we lost touch when he became my ex and her sister became his new wife, but I was on her RR list for a few years after this.
The last RR I got from her told me all about her sister-in-laws wonderful marriage (to my ex), and how she wished them well for their future together... she clearly didn;t think that one through ;o)

Gosh, teahouse, how ignorant. Do you think she just 'forgot' but was actually rubbing it in?