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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be a bit annoyed with my friend???

50 replies

bloodychildishifuaskme · 20/12/2011 18:23

this has irritated me all day.

First thing this morning my friends son came to call for my son, he wasn't allowed out as we had other friends coming round.

Anyway friends DS then says you have a flat tyre.

Great, I needed the car to get my friends from the train station later.

I text my friend and asked if possible could I borrow her car for 10 minutes whilst I whizzed to the station to get my other friends.

She text back that no I couldn't as hers funnily enough had a flat tyre too and couldn't be moved.

I ended up getting my dad to come over to fix it for me, luckily (!) my friends missed their connecting train, so were running late, and gave us time to get the car back on the road.

On the way back from the train station, I went past first friends house, no flat tyres!!!

AIBU to be a bit annoyed with her for lying to me??

I never ask for favours from anyone, she has borrowed my car loads when hers was off the road.

I ask once and get lied to!
She could have just said no!

OP posts:
fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 20/12/2011 18:25

Why would you ask to borrow a car you;re not insured on? I'd have said no too.

KatieScarlettsCrackers · 20/12/2011 18:27

Your transport difficulties are not her problem and she does not have to lend you her car.

scurryfunge · 20/12/2011 18:28

You could have changed the tyre.

Original poster
bloodychildishifuaskme · 20/12/2011 18:29

insured 3 rd party on others cars.

so yes insured.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 20/12/2011 18:30

You mean you got out of your car and checked all 4 of her tyres?

Anyway, how you you know someone hadn't mended hers too like your Dad mended yours?

Original poster
bloodychildishifuaskme · 20/12/2011 18:30

did cchange the tyre, but weren't sure we'd get it done in time for friends coming off the train.

I don't object to being told no, thats fair enough,

I object to the lying!

OP posts:
KatieScarlettsCrackers · 20/12/2011 18:31

3rd party is not insured.

If you crashed her car, who would be paying for it? Not the insurance company.

squeakytoy · 20/12/2011 18:31

Maybe she fixed her own flat tyre :)

diddl · 20/12/2011 18:31

h yes, I´d lend a car to someone who was only third party if they drove mine (not!)

Entitlement much?

And if station so close, couldn´t your friends have got a taxi?

Feminine · 20/12/2011 18:31

Thats what I hate about how insurance works in the UK, can't lend or borrow a car!

Sounds annoying ...op

NatashaBee · 20/12/2011 18:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Catsdontcare · 20/12/2011 18:32

Yabu

WorraLiberty · 20/12/2011 18:32

Why didn't you ask your Dad to take you to the station instead of faffing about with the tyre anyway?

emsyj · 20/12/2011 18:33

I have the same issue tbh - if anyone asks me for a favour I just say 'yes' and end up inconveniencing myself to do whatever a friend might ask.

But people will take advantage of your generosity and will not feel any sense of obligation to return the favour IME. I don't want to become like them and say no to people because it is not nice to be like that and it's not the sort of person I want to be. So I have just accepted that you can't rely on anyone for favours, even people who you've helped repeatedly in the past.

KatieScarlett's post just sums up the general attitude of most people, unfortunately - 'not my problem and I don't have to'. I hate that attitude, and I find it pervades Mumsnet - the 'why should I/they/you' brigade. No, you don't have to do anyone a favour, but it might be nice to do so if you can. So why not make the effort?

If it had been me and you had asked to borrow a car you weren't insured on, I'd have just gone to the station myself to pick up your friends. But most people aren't like me.

SixtyFootDoll · 20/12/2011 18:33

Er maybe she changer her OWN tyre while you were fading about ringing your daddy to change yours?

KatieScarlettsCrackers · 20/12/2011 18:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

HecateGoddessOfTwelfthNight · 20/12/2011 18:34

I understand why you're cross. I hate to be lied to as well.

"No" I can handle. Lies I can't stand.

diddl · 20/12/2011 18:35

I don´t see lending a car as a favour tbh-I think it´s a bloody big ask.

Giving a lift a different thing.

FabbyChic · 20/12/2011 18:35

Id never let anybody drive my car insured or not and I drive a car that only cost 550.

GypsyMoth · 20/12/2011 18:36

Op.... Why do you think you are insured to drive 'any' car? Is there some special insurance you can get?

emsyj · 20/12/2011 18:38

KatieScarlett I didn't say that you were all that's wrong with society. I just don't like your attitude of 'why should I help someone, it's not my problem'. But you are in good company, I find most people are like you.

I'm happy not to be. I have also reported your post as it is a personal attack.

UnexpectedOrangeInMyStocking · 20/12/2011 18:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KatieScarlettsCrackers · 20/12/2011 18:39

And your post wasn't?

Grow up.

Cartoonjane · 20/12/2011 18:40

If she lied to you I dont bame you for being annoyed. I would be too, but maybe she had had it fixed by then like you had.

As for borrowing her car, I think its a shame but if you are not insured you cant expect her to lend you her car.

TrinityRhino · 20/12/2011 18:41

the op is legal to drive any other car that is insured by someone else but she will only be third party fire and theft

which is not enough in my opinion and I don't lend my car for that reason

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