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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

and tight about my Xmas food shopping?

82 replies

Bogeyface · 14/12/2011 21:06

I was called stingy today!

My total food delivery for the Xmas, including dinner for 12 and 8 bottles of wine, comes to less than £150. That includes "normal" food for my family of 8 for 4 days. Her exact words were "OMG how stingy, Merry Xmas Ebeneezer!"

My "friend", well, friend of a friend really, kindly informed me that she was spending over half that just on the turkey and that if she only spent what I am spending then it would be "total crap".

Thanks for that.

We dont have masses of money
I wont go into debt for the sake of one day
Our meal will be huge, lots of lovely leftovers for boxing day and taste delicious. It is all homemade from scratch, including stuffing, pigs in blakets etc and the pudding (homemade mincemeat icecream). It will have all of the trimmings, a nice big tea and plenty to drink. I have just managed over the years to get my shopping bill for a good healthy diet, down to the bare minimum. Our weekly shopping bill is never over £80 and tbh I have heart failure if my main shop is over £60! I top up for milk bread etc at the corner shop.

So does it really matter what it cost? And we are having chicken after a family vote 2 years ago where we all agreed we dont really like turkey anyway :o

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 14/12/2011 22:26

That scrimpers thing did make me Shock

When I saw the trolleys outside their house I thought that was their waste for 5 years or something, not ONE years shopping! I loved the fact that they all thought it was nicer though, probably they were glad they werent expected to eat everything in sight.

I have been thinking about this over the last half hour or so and actually I think I have been quite mean to this woman. If you were to look through the window to her life you would think she had it all, but it does come at a price. She wants more children her DH wont let her have, she doesnt appear to be valued by him very much (remembering a comment he made earlier this year at a party about her living off him as a SAHM) and possibly she needs to make herself feel better by looking down on me.

I feel quite guilty now for slagging her off. She wouldnt feel the need to say these things about me if she was happy would she? Maybe she is jealous of me (mad cow!)? I have a couple of super rich v good friends bitches and they would never say this sort of thing.

Our mutual friend and I are having our "SAHM's Office Party" next week, with a couple of other friends. I think we should invite her along, what do you think?

OP posts:
winterfox · 14/12/2011 22:29

i have to admit to being a bit Hmm about the prices on some of the marks and spencer cuts of meat on their chistmas leaflet, some turkeys were about £75 seems very overindulgent to me

we just get a chicken and nice bit of beef - i prefer to stuff myself with cake afterwards Grin

fatlazymummy · 14/12/2011 22:29

Invite her along bogeyface and be the better person. Having a good attitude and the ability to make the most of things is much more important than having a lot of money, IMO.

lisaro · 14/12/2011 22:31

Wow - I'm actually impressed, OP.

ageperfect · 14/12/2011 22:46

Christmas is not only about who spend how much ...last year my DP bought extra special corn fed turkey for £5 last minute(original price was around £80)...and it was just tasty... I think she was just plain rude and it's not her business.You enjoy your Christmas, it's one day for family,yes, we all like fancy food but fancy doesn't mean expensive. Year before we were really in difficult situation and we made roast chicken with sides,home made cake and dd's were more than happy. We didn't have visitors and it was our day.It's crazy how much some people spend around Christmas time,but actual meaning of Christmas is not even there(no offend to anyone-i do it too if i can).It was so different when i was growing up-century agoXmas Wink....

AliBellandthe40jingles · 14/12/2011 22:52

Spuddy that sounds vile. I cannot understand this mania for having many kinds of meat on offer all at once, disgusting.

We go to my parents for Christmas, so the bill is not mine, but Mum does spend a lot. We are there for several days, she and I make everything from scratch and there is very, very little waste.

It doesn't matter how much you spend, and I have to say I find it a bit odd that people discuss these things in RL.

droves · 14/12/2011 22:53

xmas dinner @ droves house .

family of 9 < 2 adults , 3 teens , 2 kids> , plus grandparents>

3 bird roast £10
roast gammon £ 10 aprox
steak pie for dd4 home made £ 5

veg ,potatoes ect £ 5

puddings £10

soup

drinks

£50 MAX.

NEW YEAR DRINKS &nibbles ORDER .....£180 ...Hmm

ZombieMonkeyBrains · 14/12/2011 22:54

I'm doing my normal weekly shop at Lidl on 22nd, with a few extra bits which I'll possibly get elsewhere if they haven't got them. I'll get a couple of bottles of Cava, a bottle of nice red half of which will be used for cooking and I'm ordering a joint of venison online tomorrow. I don't expect to spend £100. It's only one day! I'll make the day special for us but it only needs to last the one day.

Bogeyface · 14/12/2011 23:11

Well thank you Droves you can add a new laptop to this years bill thanks to me snorting coffee down my nose and all over the keyboard. Yes, my nose.

And I will also sue you for making my cold worse! :o:o

OP posts:
nothingoldcanstay · 14/12/2011 23:27

Mmm... but for me too visit my loved ones costs £97.40 in train fares (with a railcard) and about £20 in petrol for my father to pick us up from the station. Factor in online shopping (not as cheap as you think due to delivery or 3 for 2 ) because I can't lug it all on the train means bloody expensive. You just might as well kick the arse out of it because you won't be doing it again.

PresentsRibbonsAndMerrySantas · 14/12/2011 23:29

ignore her, my xmas food shop is no different to any other week, on christmas day its a roast dinner like any other week, its just in the day instead. alot of people that i tell this looked Shock but i just don't get the big food shop, if i had people over i would just buy a few more veg and a bigger piece of meat.

WibblyBibble · 15/12/2011 00:10

Er, I'm hoping mine comes to less than £50 (my normal week's food budget is around £40, as am on low income, IS, obviously massively generous state etc etc taxpayers subsidising my extravagent lifestyle LOL you wanky posh bastards). You can tell them that if you like? (I also don't have a widescreen telly, a goat or a wii, I'm hoping some other benefit scrounger can pop along and tell me which form I need to fill in for that as obviously the DHSS have overlooked mine).

Laquitar · 15/12/2011 00:26

It is only one meal fgs!
I would rather spend a bit extra every month of the year for nice fruit or treats than being miserable all year because i have spend £100s for one roast.

Mind you we spend more on NYE but thats because we prefer it to Christmas. But still not much, i prefer to spread the money (food, treats, clothes) throughout the year.

valiumredhead · 15/12/2011 08:28

Christmas dinner is just a roast with a few extras, I can never understand why people spend hundreds, it's silly

Exactly!!

andaPontyinaPearTreeeeee · 15/12/2011 08:40

Ugh, what a food snob. And a nasty cow to boot. NOTHING gives her the right to make you feel bad.

I don't really know how much we will spend - DH is doing a big shop this morning, though that will include usual stuff like laundry etc. and also we have 3 xmases (us, DSCs, grandparents on different days). Thankfully my dad pays for some of the food as we cook it all. We don't drink so that keeps the cost down, although probably what we save on that gets spent on chocolate :o

I really don't understand the obsession with spending loads on food anyway... We get more ingredients, but they are still Asda smart price or whatever - it's what you DO with the ingredients that counts!

PieCherry · 15/12/2011 09:14

My Oven is broken, so the family are having cooked sliced turkey (I'm veggie), so I'm not spending much at all.

Bollocks to em - XMas shouldn''t be about money. Once the wine starts flowing no one will care anyway:)

Merry (hic) Xmas!!

MollyTheMole · 15/12/2011 09:30

your Xmas sounds lovely, she sounds like a hag

FWIW my Xmas food shopping is going to come to around £60 for four of us, booze, turkey joint, loads of chocs and cakes. Like you I refuse to get into debt for one bleedin day. More fool her

Scholes34 · 15/12/2011 09:46

My PIL bought our turkey last year and insisted that we buy it from the local butcher - organic, free range. Cost them about £80. Must say that once it was accompanied by all the trimmings, I couldn't tell the difference between that and the one I'd bought frozen a few Christmasses before. Good home cooking sounds super. We'll be doing the same.

nursenic · 15/12/2011 14:07

Our boiler broke on Christmas Eve last year but despite that, we had a wonderful time. Had a real laugh 'dressing up' to open the stockings in our bed (our youngest is 17!) in a motley collection of long Johns, Christmas PJ's, tartan blankets and throws, woolly socks and bobble hats! it actually wasn't that cold but we loved the drama....

We don't actually spend that much extra on food TBH. The Stocking gifts are my true indulgence with them usually overflowing onto the bed. My DH dresses up as Santa, slings cowbells round his neck and creeps into each bedroom to deliver stockings. Last year he could see DD's bed shaking with her BF trying and failing to contain his laughter at the sight of DH.

The memories that are best are the ones that usually involve little cost.

We shop selectively, choosing what food to get from what place. The local market's one of the best in the UK so we buy all our fruit/veg/eggs/bread from there plus deli stuff and cheese.

ViviPrudolf · 15/12/2011 14:10

I simply can't conceive of being friends with someone who would be that rude to me Confused

knockneedandknackered · 15/12/2011 14:15

i just get little bits leading up to xmas so it dosent feel like i have a huge bill i dont spend alot on xmas. its more the drink for me and nibbles for the kids

mollymole · 15/12/2011 15:41

if she thinks you are stingy then you had better send her round to mine !!!
what a cow

Oggy · 15/12/2011 15:57

YANBU but you are a clever shopper.

I don't think I could cater for that many over Xmas period including wine for that, but that is my failing (probably laziness) and says nothing about you, only me.

OldeChestnut · 15/12/2011 16:06

i think it's extraordinary when people spend huge amounts of money on JUST ONE DAY

why? its a celebration, I like to enjoy it and have lots of things we dont have on any other day of the year. I save all my Tesco vouchers up through the year and have around £200 so am entitled to splash out on whatever I chose to. Plus I always have around 12 people for lunch so I like treating them to nice things

issey6cats · 15/12/2011 16:11

i already have the meat in the freezer for christmas day and boxing day, leg of pork for day 1 beef for day 2 as no one here likes turkey, £10 each joint, thats for 6 people each day, got two pavlovas in the freezer one for each day £3 each at asdas, will spend around £20 on goodies ie biccies and choccies, £10 on a bottle of oscars and a bottle of aldis version of baileys so grand total for the two days £56

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