Birthday party on DD's birthday - AIBU and WWYD

[Chesticles]

My friend has twins which are a year younger than my DD (4yo, almost 5). Almost to the day, their birthday is Fri 13th and DD's Sun 15th. I am very good friends with her and am the twins godmother.

She has arranged a party at a local soft play for her girls for the sunday afternoon to which DD is invited. However I am a bit and not sure what to do. She did mention a few weeks ago that she had tried to get the venue on the Sat but couldn't so she had to book the Sunday, but at the time I didn't clock the date so didn't pay much attention to the converstion.

I am not having a party for DD as she had one last year and I don't want to get into the habit of her expecting a party every year. However I feel a little sad that on DD's birthday she will be going to a party where the twins are getting all the attention and sung to and cake etc (rightly so, it is their party).

I don't want to not go to the party, as I don't want to cause friction between friend and myself over what is a relatively small thing. DH says AIBU and should get over myself. But I just feel a bit sad for DD.

So you dont want to give our DD a party AND dont want her to go to someone elses?

our DD? no Im not your DH. obv

I don't understand why she couldn't just have a few friends around to your house and have a party at home, if she wants a party. Would be more fun than just having her brothers and grandparents, most 5 or 6 year old would want to have their friends at a party. It doesn't have to be expensive, just invite a smallish number of friends, play a few games or whatever, and can be just as much fun as a soft play party.

Why is is so much for a 5 year old to expect a party every year on her birthday?
If you can't have a party when you are 5 it's a shame.
In five minutes she'll be grown up and gone.

Why don't you co-host the party?

Seems a simple solution to me.

I would say go- we've been to parties where it has been someone elses birthday as well - generally they will get a go a blowing out the candles or a special mention but regardless of that they'll have a great time with their friends. It's not the whole day and they can still do the special things in the morning and evening.

Honestly I think these things are a bigger deal to us parents than the kids who just want to go to a party and have a good time