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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to believe my mother stuffed my ds full of crap last night

35 replies

scaryhairydroopytits · 10/12/2011 13:30

Dp and I went out for the first time in 18 months last night. My mum won't travel here (30 miles away) and we have no other family nearby. She and dad were happy to babysit for ds1 (3.5) and ds2 (8 mo). It's the third time they have had ds1, the last time being may 2010, they've never had ds2.
We took both kids to them yesterday afternoon, spent the day there, I put ds2 to bed (bf to sleep) and we went at 7.30 leaving them with ds2 still up.
Got back at midnight, ds2 still up, running around hyper, bought both kids home as previously arranged, thought we'd be transferring them to car asleep, ds1 fell asleep straight away anyway as soon as we drove off which he always dies in the car.
This morning greeted by ds1 covered in vomit, all over him, his bed, the carpet, and he'd pooed in the night. The vomit appeared to contain flaky pastry.
Asked mum if he had eaten anything after we left, she said absolutely not. He hadn't eaten any pastry all day and the house was groaning under the weight of cake when we arrived, muffins, scones, strudel, profiteroles, mince pies, all of which were offered continually through the day.
Aibu to not believe her assertion that ds1 had not been fed a steady diet of cake all night? He is not the most reliable witness, he says he had a green racing car cake when we went out.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 10/12/2011 13:33

Your 8 month old was 'running around hyper'? Confused

I don't know, it sounds to me like the stomach bug that's doing the rounds

If he'd eaten too much, I'm sure he would have been sick in the car.

Catsmamma · 10/12/2011 13:36

I bet he really enjoyed all the cakes!

Shame about the vom though....she is his granny and providing he has no life threatening allergies to green racing car cakes I think you have to put up and shut up tbh.

Vexing for sure, but that's what grandmas are for.

scaryhairydroopytits · 10/12/2011 13:37

Ooh worra, no not my 8 month old! My 3.5 year old ds1 was running around hyper. Sorry.

OP posts:
naturalbaby · 10/12/2011 13:37

i wouldn't make a judgement on apparant stomach contents. would flaky pastry still look like flaky pastry after sitting in liquid for 12hrs?

just tell your mum your ds appears to have picked up a nasty bug in the last few hours or consumed something which doesn't agree with him to the extent that you've been dealinig with all manor of bodily fluids. tell her in an innocent, concerned manor that you hope whatever it is that's upset him isn't passed onto her. leave her to think about it and feel guilty if she did what you think she did.
or you could ask her outright. what do you think she would say?

fraktious · 10/12/2011 13:38

I think you gut your 1s and 2s mixed up? DS1 was left up and still up when you got back?

She might have fed him crap but I don't think that caused the vomming. Besides grandparents often do spoil the DGCs and an evening of cake isn't going to kill him, assuming no underlying medical contraindications.

Yuck that you examined the sick in enough detail though.

WorraLiberty · 10/12/2011 13:39

Oh right, it did confuse me I must admit Grin

It still sounds like a stomach bug to me though

tigermoll · 10/12/2011 13:41

It's hard to tell what vomit may once have been, - especially hard to tell if it was once flaky pasty, surely? But I'm sure you're right, - if there was cake/mince pies/strudel in the house, then he had the lot.

I would say no outright accusations are necessary, - just lay it on really thick to your mum about how poorly the poor little mite felt, how much his tummy hurt, how he couldn't go out and play etc. Don't stress how much work it created for you to have to clean up the vom, - that will be much less effective. Maybe he even said something along the lines of 'will my tummy hurt if I go back to Nana's?' and you've had to assure him that, next time he goes back there, it wont happen again.

scaryhairydroopytits · 10/12/2011 13:44

Tigermoll, that is brilliant, I'll do that.
I am not some sort of sick vomit inspector by the way, it was just the largest lump of sick at the top of the stairs had pieces of flaky pastry sticking out of it!

OP posts:
TararaBOOMdeay · 10/12/2011 13:57

You're wasting your energy stressing about grandparents feeding your children shite food.

Save yourself the bother and accept right now that feeder grandparents will always be feeder grandparents.
Use the energy you would have wasted to start looking for more reliable babysitters. Grin

GwendolineMaryLacedwithBrandy · 10/12/2011 13:59

Does it matter? Your parents looked after them, you had a good night, it's not a daily occurrence. So they gave them some junk, hey ho. :)

GwendolineMaryLacedwithBrandy · 10/12/2011 14:03

That wasn't meant to be arsey btw, just... don't sweat it.

pigletmania · 10/12/2011 14:04

Your overreacting tbh, he probably ate too much and was sick, it happens to most children. It was lovely that your parents looked after him and his brother whist you were able to go out. I ate too much ice cream (nearly a tub) when I was a child, and was obviously sick that night.

pigletmania · 10/12/2011 14:05

I am still here to tell the tale Grin, chill out, grandparents spoil their grandkids count yourself lucky you have lovely parents willing to look after then, on thread here are posters that would love the gps to be involved in their child's life.

AKissIsNotAContract · 10/12/2011 14:07

I'd be more pissed off that your mum lied to you about it.

Feminine · 10/12/2011 14:10

akisscan't you see why? Grin

pigletmania · 10/12/2011 14:12

exactly, she knew op would overreact about it

youarekidding · 10/12/2011 14:31

you need to chill about what your parents feed your DS' so there'll be honest with you about it so sugar highs and vom incidents are by pre warning. Grin

My mum always gives me a list of the crap she's fed (now 7yo DS). Pre warned is forearmed. Wink

Pandemoniaa · 10/12/2011 15:01

ds2 was fairly regularly sick after visits to former PILS. Not because they fed him crap, as such, but because he was such a greedy little sod! The results of his Trifle Fests were truly technicolour and he almost always treated the carpets at home to them. On the couple of occasions that he got away with what we described as "crap", he was so atrociously hyper at their house that MIL was careful to avoid repeating the exercise.

But (food allergies apart) once in a while, a spot of indulgence from gps won't hurt any child and is honestly not worth causing problems about. So YANBU about preferring a vomit-free aftermath but probably ABU to make too much about it.

MeltedAdventCalendarChocolates · 10/12/2011 15:05

YABU Chill. You don't know that he didn't wander in to the kitchen and sneak off with some cake.

valiumredhead · 10/12/2011 15:07

It's probably just a bug.

MigratingChestnutsOnAnOpenFire · 10/12/2011 15:14

I don't see why his grand parents can't spoil him, that's what they are for! And junk food isn't going to harm them once in a while.

Probably a sick bug because its unlikely he would have thrown up so long afterwards just from being too full.

I'd relax a little if I were you!

Sudaname · 10/12/2011 15:26

Did he eat any cakes pastries etc while you were still there during the day and if they were freely on offer as you say did you allow him to ? If so then YABU but if you made it clear to your DPs that he wasnt allowed that stuff or only small quantity of - then you are still being a bit U - because as others have said thats unfortunately what DGPs do - they are from a generation whereby food especially sweet stuff = spoiling them a bit and affection and all that.

AFuckingFestiveKnackeredWoman · 10/12/2011 15:31

YABU Its a grandparents job to stuff them full of shite! It wont kill him or make him obese to eat a cake or two every once in a while

I used to get a sticky bun in town on a Sunday and a bag of sweets on the way home

scaryhairydroopytits · 10/12/2011 15:32

Ok I Abu! But I do think to feed crap to the point of inducing vomiting is excessive. What does it matter? Well I am currently trying to get the third load of washing caused by this dry, but more significantly ds1 has been upset and feeling unwell all day. We don't ban junk in this house but 1 cake is enough! I know grandparents like to spoil grandchildren and mine certainly did me, but they never made me sick.

OP posts:
Merlotmonster · 10/12/2011 15:36

if he still ill today, then maybe it is a bug ....

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