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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want the council to house me after leaving abusive husband?

85 replies

EllenandBump · 08/12/2011 20:03

I left my husband on 5th november and went down to mum's in kent. I then applied to the coucil for housing as my mum hasnt got the room for us to stay there permanently. And when i say abusive, he stabbed me in the leg in one incident.

Today, I received a letter to say that bexley council advise that i approach northampton council (where i left) to get rehoused.

Is it so unreasonable for me to want to be housed in the borough i spent my first 16years of life, where my sister lives and the same borough as my mum was born in and has lived for all 64years of her life?

I have explained that i have PND and need support and have no friends in northampton, and only had my husband there. My mum and sister are my only family. just dont see how they can refer me back there with a clear conscience. Although, i havent told the police the extent of it, cos i didnt want trouble from his family and just want to move on, i dont really want to have every thing dragged up in court.

OP posts:
thepeoplesprincess · 08/12/2011 20:09

Continue to pursue your claim anyway, unless they've specifically sated they won't house you. They'll only be advising you to go back to Northampton in the hope that you'll piss off and stop bothering them to do their jobs.

Also, you'll be helping yourself further if you report your ex to the police. Just explain that you don't want to press charges and just need a crime number for your housing application. They'll be quite used to it.

slavetofilofax · 08/12/2011 20:10

I'm sorry for the situation you find yourself in, but I think yabu.

You can't just turn up somewhere and decide you want to live there, even if you have family there. Otherwise everyone would do it if they fancied a change. Unless you are prepared to press charges they shouldn't consider you for a council house, because for all they know, you could be lying. It's sad for people like you who have a genuine need and a genuine reason to be near your family, but the fact is that they have to have criteria otherwise people would just lie to get a house where they want.

SantaDesperatelySeeksSedatives · 08/12/2011 20:11

I'm sorry you're having a tough time Sad Can you phone Women's Aid for advice?

LaurieFairyCake · 08/12/2011 20:12

Have you got children? If not you're on a hiding to nothing to get housed by the council.

And your mum will have to state you can't live there too.

What about private rental? Have you found work yet?

TheFrogs · 08/12/2011 20:13

I think that must be pretty standard. I know here we aren't "allowed" to move out of the borough. Could you go in to your council and speak to someone about it, to find out what exactly the rules are?

thepeoplesprincess · 08/12/2011 20:13

slavetofilofax You're wrong. You can "turn up" somewhere and decide you want to live there if you have close family there. It's what's known ;as a local connection on the housing criteria spec.

yellowraincoat · 08/12/2011 20:16

I think calling Woman's Aid is a good bet. Also getting something on file from the police. If the council can't house you, you can go private and get housing benefit til you are settled with a job, if you are able to work.

Sounds really stressful for you, hope you get it sorted.

GypsyMoth · 08/12/2011 20:18

Yes, you have to prove your 'local connection' though.

How many dc? Pregnant?

How many rooms/people at your mums? Did you leave a tenancy in your name behind in your old town?

GypsyMoth · 08/12/2011 20:19

And yes, you do need to report this to police.

happyinherts · 08/12/2011 20:19

slavetofilofax - OP isn't turning up 'anywhere.' She's gone to her mum's, her only family support and the place where she has lived for a number of years before. It's a local connection.

People with far less of a local connection have managed to secure themselves tenancies, I know for a fact.

I think OP does need to provide detailed medical evidence of both PND and attack from partner to carry weight. Also would need mum to evict and therefore make OP and family homeless or prove very much overcrowding so as to gain more points.

OP hang on in there and don't be put off by them wanting to fob you off back to Northampton. Social housing is social housing - for those that have a need and deserve it. Why not you?

acumenin · 08/12/2011 20:19

YANBU if you have community links. Er, could pos cite

"Ensuring that where people are given reasonable preference because they have a need to move to a particular locality in Northampton, where failure to
12
meet that need would cause hardship section 167(2)(e) would be granted Band A status. Thus applies equally to people who are not resident in Northampton."

If you persist it seems achievable. Get a crime number, call Women's Aid, and read this

baubleybobbityhat · 08/12/2011 20:19

Yabu.

JeremyVile · 08/12/2011 20:20

Yes, second Thepeoplespricess. Slavetofilofax, can I ask why you said what you did with such apparent authority? Did someone tell you that that was the case?

Anyway, Ellen - bexley council may well prefer you go back to northampton, but you most certainly CAN apply for housing in Bexley as you fulfill the lacal connection requirements. Nothing to do with the abusive ex or anything else. Sorry about that btw, well done you for leaving Smile

curtainsclosed · 08/12/2011 20:23

Contact 'shelter'.

They have info on their website about your rights for council housing.

The bit about your local connection and support from your DM and DSis along with the abuse you have suffered fit the councils criteria for housing you.

They are trying their luck as social housing stock is low.

Good on you for leaving and it will get better soon. xx

noir · 08/12/2011 20:24

"You can't just turn up somewhere and decide you want to live there"

Actually she can if she's fleeing domestic violence and has connections to the area. Unfortunately the LA will try every book in the trick to get shot of her (I say this as a social worker who has seen several clients in this situation). OP if you can't stay at your Mum's any longer tell the LA you require a homelessness assessment under Section 184 of the Housing Act 1996. If they refuse tell them you'll get a solicitor. The assessment is very in depth and can take several weeks, if you're considered a priority need they may accommodate you temporarily whilst the assessment is ongoing. I would second the advice to call Women's Aid as they will know about these things and may even do you a supporting letter.

noir · 08/12/2011 20:28

Umm I just said every book in the trick - its been a loong day haha!

gamerwidow · 08/12/2011 20:30

I think they have to add you to the housing register at least but housing stock is so low it's practically non existant in Bexley.
Have you seen if you will be entitled to housing benefit in a private rental?

FabbyChic · 08/12/2011 20:31

You have to reside in any borough for a year in most councils until you can even go on the list sorry, your only hope is rented accomodation in the private sector.

GypsyMoth · 08/12/2011 20:31

Have you left a tennancy behind in Northampton op?

babyhammock · 08/12/2011 20:31

YOU NEED TO REPORT EVERYTHING TO THE POLICE. Seriously start docmenting everything. If you start getting or expect trouble, look at applying for a non molestation

Original poster
EllenandBump · 08/12/2011 20:35

I do have an incident report number from both the met police and northamptonshire police, but they seem not to be pressing charges. I didnt want to go through it all, i am starting to get myself sorted out and feel better. as for proof of PND, i am currently on ESA because of it and spent 3 days in moray lodge (respite care) because of my mental state and have a health visitor appointment on wednesday, to make sure i am coping. Surely, a doctors letter would prove PND or health visitors and my repeat prescription of citalopram should help too.

My mums is a two bedroom property, i have one son, now 18months and myself. My sister also stays here a lot. My mum has written to the council and told them that she cannot have me staying with her on a permanent basis. Which is the case. There really is very little room. My son is in a travel cot and climbing out of it and there is no room for a proper cot or cot bed and i am in my mum's room which is the biggest room.

Unfortunately it was a joint tenancy i left behind, but he has just as much right to be there as me and i dont really want him knowing where i live. Have even thought about adopting a dog for protection.

Thank you for everyones support and advice. I have spoken to shelter and they have put me in contact with a housing law solicitor, just want to know my chances of actually getting housed? or whether i will have to return to norrthampton, cos i really cant face that. xx

OP posts:
thepeoplesprincess · 08/12/2011 20:35

FabbyChic You're also talking nonce sense. If the council accept that she is homeless, which they will if what she's told us is true and she can back it up, they'll have to offer her accomodation immediately. It'll quite probably be B&B/temp. tho until her name comes to the top of the list.

GypsyMoth · 08/12/2011 20:35

Fabby? Have never heard that before!!

FreyaoftheNorth · 08/12/2011 20:36

If you are fleeing domestic violence, a local connection is not necessary (if you have proof such as crime numbers). But you do have a local connection in any case. It would be a good idea to see Shelter or CAB if you need some support making your case

GypsyMoth · 08/12/2011 20:37

It doesn't sound like you are overcrowded at your mums unfortunately