to wonder if SIL is being ridiculous about 27th Dec?

[mrcamel]

Both me and BIL (DHs sisters husband) happen to be from the same city. Very very far way for where DH and SIL are from.

Anyway we have 2 young DCs and another coming very soon so we are heading up to my parents for christmas (i'm on mat leave and DH a teacher so all of xmas off). My 4 DBro and 1 Dsis with families will also be around/staying (3 live up and 3 of us live dont) - bit of a squeeze but we are use to it :)

Anyway SIL and BIL have 2 DCs and are having christmas with SIL (and DHs) parents but coming up to where I and (BIL) are up from boxing day for a few days.

Anyway we said why dont they come over my parents day after boxing day (my parents love having people over, they have always had a 'free house' policy' - and it was their initial idea - one which DH and I love the idea)

They both agreed and seemed to look forward to it esp their DCs and ours - we dont live close to each other so dont see each other a lot.

Anyway I get a message from SIL (DHs sister) today saying that unfortunatly they wont be able to make it on 27th.
I reply saying that I am sorry, hoped they could come but if dates dont fit it is fine etc.
She says suggesting to meet up, maybe in city centre or her husbands parents place.
I reply (again) saying that it would be a stuggle to get to his parents place (they live very very far out ) and we are getting train up from home (in case of weather). So my parents or centre would be best for us.
She finally says that - we will have to sort out a time to meet up in town as she is not comfortble having DCs in .....(place where my parents live and I grew up)

I was shocked and actually ended up phoning her. We chatted for a bit and it came out that they are free on 27th but it is just that she doesnt want her DCs in the area.

DH and SIL come from very middle class upbring - small town, nice schools etc (and there is no problem with that at all) and does BIL (SIL husband)
While I come from a very rough (council estate) area - it's name is often bashed around as one of the worst in the UK.

I am actually a bit insulted and think she is depriving us, both our DCs and herself of seeing other familiy members around christmas for the sake of driving/walking into an area and then just being in a house.
(and I did say if they ended up getting a bus me or DH would meet them and if we couldnt I would send one of my brothers.)

AIBU? part of me thinks I am - her choice and that but another part of me thinks she is being ridiculous

god not the aylesbury :) - aylesbury estate in south london.
pombear i like to think of my parents as good decent people too :D - been there for years really since late 70's (when it started to go down hill a tad - in the 80's really)

Fair point about car - but they could get public transport (okay SIL is scared of tube but there are other ways)

samandi well I love spending my xmases there - but I suppose it is where i am from, view it differently and all

If they are worried about the car, there are plenty of "nice" streets cheek by jowl with London estates. They could always park up somewhere "safe" and one of you could go and collect them and drop them back at the end of the day.

What's wrong with the Aylesbury estate? I used to live on the council estate on the other side of Burgess Park from the Aylesbury.

She leave her car in the Tesco's? carpark on the Old Kent Road, and walk over.

Number 12/68 from the Elephant. Oh, I see she doesn't like the tube either.

What marries said about parking in a nicer street, then.

She is rude and ignorant.

She was invited to your parents house, not I presume to hang around on the street corners drinking cider? And nor I presume were you intending to kick the kids out into the wild west streetstelling them to not come back till it hit dark??

Has she been watching too much shameless??

You are very calm OP. I'd be incandescent with rage at the insult to my family.

She's been invited to spend time in your parents home with your family and she thinks it's too rough to come? What a silly cow.

OK, I can imagine in her place, having a nervous conversation with DH as We drive there about whether he thought the car would be OK. But I've never say that to you, and I'd just quietly hope the wheels went being removed while we were inside enjoying christmaas with you.

She is a silly cow.

What a cow.

Sorry to the person I've accidentally just reported on this thread. It's far too easy on this phone. As you were...