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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to not have advent calendars for my DC this year?

27 replies

birdiebrain · 01/12/2011 07:56

DC are 15 and 17. They are mortified that they have no advent calendar this year. The problem is that we had an arms war and each year the calendars became more elaborate - it all started with chocolate calendars, escalated to Playmobil calendars (you build a charming winter scene) and last year I surpassed myself with a several hundred pound effort including earrings, USB sticks, lipsticks, Calvin Klein knickers, perfume - basically anything small enough to fit into the pockets of our reusable fabric Christmas advent calendar (it's quite a challenge).

So AIBU to call a halt to it before I go bankrupt? Or am I a mean spirited Grinch?

(And I haven't started their stockings either)

OP posts:

MabelLucyAttwell · 01/12/2011 08:00

If they want and must have an advent calendar, why not go back to one where they open windows and find chocolate? It would tell them that they are behaving like children and that you do not have the money to spend lavishly on them.

Do they have part time joibs like paper delivery? If not why not? What do they give you for Christmas. Your children have no idea of the cost of living let alone luxuries!

themildmanneredjanitor · 01/12/2011 08:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OddBaubles · 01/12/2011 08:01

YANBU to stop doing as much it but I would say you are a bit unreasonable if you only told them this morning that this would be the case and haven't given them the time to buy themselves a chocolate one if they wanted to.

slavetofilofax · 01/12/2011 08:03

YANBU to not do as much as you have done before, but you could have got them a chocolate one.

Northernlurker · 01/12/2011 08:04

They're big enough to get over it. Wtf were you thinking last year woman?

izzywhizzysmincepies · 01/12/2011 08:06

YABU.

Channel your inner Scrooge Santa, hie thee to a £ shop and buy a couple of bags of godawful colourful sweets to fill the pockets of your reusable advent calendar.

As for their stockings, a tangerine and a 5 piece will invoke the Spirit of Christmas Past. If they're not suitably grateful you can recycle their main presents for next year.

WhoWhoWhoWho · 01/12/2011 08:06

at last year's offerings, no wonder they are disappointed!

Offer them the chance for a 50p chocolate one. They may well lose interest when they realise it will not be like last years.

MrsSleepy · 01/12/2011 08:06

I still get one from my Nan and I'm 28!!

Original poster

birdiebrain · 01/12/2011 08:21

Yeah, like I said it escalated! In my defence, DD2 was very ill this time two years ago which is when it first went OTT and I did think we might lose her so I pulled out all the stops. Last year, I didn't want to tempt fate. Happily she is making a fab recovery and I now dare to hope all will be well (not quite fully out of the woods, but you know, nearly....) and she couldn't eat chocolate at the time. So an ordinary calendar would seem such a disappointment that I thought perhaps cold turkey pre-Christamas was the way to go.

I will go and buy the best chocolate I can find (?Godiva's) and put it in the reusable stocking :-) and maybe something special for 24th - I have time to shop for that.

OP posts:

GwendolineMaryLacedwithBrandy · 01/12/2011 08:25

WTactualF? M&S little bags of chocolate Santas, 3 for 2, job done. Anything else is sheer madness even given the circumstances you've described.

DELHI · 01/12/2011 13:32

They are 15 & 17?? 17???? not 5 and 7?
They should be a bit more mature about these things, might help if you stop treating them like babies. Sorry if that's harsh but I'm

stopcomplainingthen · 01/12/2011 13:35

I can't believe you spent all that on advent calendars in the first place

StaceymAloneForver · 01/12/2011 13:52

my dp is incredibly upset he wont be getting an advent calender from his mum, he is 26 and should grow up, he asked me to buy one, i told him to buy his own.

At 17 i had dd, i don't even get xmas pressies anymore

blackteaplease · 01/12/2011 13:55

My MILjust did them for dh and his brothers, they are 27, 32 and 35. She also does stockings for them.

Do you want to be in this position in 10 years time? Get them a cheapy chocoltate one, or buy a megapack of malteasers to fill up the fabric one. Then tell them when they hit 18/ leave home that's it.

babyhammock · 01/12/2011 14:02

Wow what an amazing thing to do.... hard act to follow though!
I'd do a small scale 'fun' version if you have time this year...

mmmm you've given me an idea for next year lol ...obviously much more cheapo version

PresentsRibbonsAndMerrySantas · 01/12/2011 14:08

my dc's asked for playmobile calander, i said no, then i realised i had not bought any calanders, said to dp shall i not bother this year they have not mentioned them [apart from the playmobile ones but i have 4] he came home with 4 choc ones the very next day, so it did cross my mind not to bother, but dp took over

AnyoneforTurps · 01/12/2011 15:07

Not only have I received one from my mother (I'm 42) but I've sent one to her - she's 68 . Just calendars with pictures though - we are advent purists.

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 01/12/2011 15:21

my mum made my ds's a lovely fabric advent years ago its a christmas tree with a row of pockets underneath each with a little handsewn cushion with a picture on it they have velcro on the back and each day one is put onto the tree as an ornament until the fairy for the top on 24th, its lovely and ds2 (15) still like doing it now. luckily this means that we have avoided the whole chocolate / toy advents. amazes me really that even older DC like the old traditions they start as a child, I assumed they would be a bit meh at some now they are older but nope still want a stocking and still want to open it in our bed. awwww

NorthernChinchilla · 01/12/2011 15:40

My mother knows that she has to get one for me and my OH.

Must be chocolate.

We are both 31.

The first year I came home with my chocolate advent calendar, his trembling bottom lip was a sight to behold, so now she gets for us both. It's become a little Xmas tradition and I wouldn't change it for the world!

So if they're used to it, YABU to go completely cold turkey, but definitely scale it back by many, many degrees!

BarkisIsWillin · 01/12/2011 17:08

When I saw the title I thought you meant you weren't getting the chocolate ones this year! My 14 yr old ds has been moaning since he came home from school that I didn't buy any this year (I just forgot). No doubt dd(18) will chime in when she gets home and I will go and buy them tomorrow. The one you did last year sounds fab, especially under the circumstances, but far too expensive - could you buy a few trinkets and alternate the pockets with chocs and small things? Even something in every 3rd or 4th pocket and chocs inthe rest.

usualsuspect · 01/12/2011 17:11

get one from the pound shop

I got my 19 year old DS a Dr Who one

Maryz · 01/12/2011 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AFuckingFestiveKnackeredWoman · 01/12/2011 17:13

Im 26 and my dad still buys my calender!

I got a harry potter one this year( i wanted captain America)

PeanutsRoastingOnAnOpenFire · 01/12/2011 17:15

haribo minis or chocolates out of a multipack in pockets of last years calendar, if not a chocolate one which may all be half price by tomorrow

JinglePosyPerkin · 01/12/2011 17:16

Your reasons for going OTT last year were sound & I'm very glad to hear your DD is doing well now . However, you seem to have set a precedent for OTT advent calendars which you need to break before you (as you say) go bankrupt!

Get them a choccy one like everyone else .

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