not to do party bags or will I seem like a miserable cowbag?

[MissCalamity]

DS is 2 in a couple of weeks and like last year we'll be having a relatively small party in our house. Last year I didn't do party bags as all the children attending were around the same age and thought it was a little bit pointless.

All the children's parties I've been to in the past year have given DS a party bag on the way out, most of which includes stuff he's never used: bouncy ball (way too small) whistle (far too noisy) those bubble blower things (all stacked up in a cupboard) and a few bits of chocolate.

I'll buy a big specially made cake for him and give everyone a bit when they are leaving (like last year)

I think a few more older children will be attending this year, so I suppose it's more of the norm to do them, I just would rather spend the money on the buffet / decorations / cake than a bit of plastic tat that will be shoved in a cupboard / bin and forgotten about.

So AIBU or not? What do you think...?!

They'll think you're a miserable cowbag. But yanbu :0)

YANBU to not like doing party bags. I hate the things, and every year decide I'm not going to do it (for the very reasons you stated) and every year I chicken out and do them anyway. I would fear accusations of meanness. Good luck!

I can still remember the excitement of getting a party bag! Usually just piece of cake, balloon and possibly a small toy or packet of sweets. Not big, not expensive but v exciting

How about getting some of those cheapy packs of books (is it the book people that do them - you know the packs of about 10 books), wrapping them and giving them out instead?

I hated Party Bags with a vengence but it seems to be expected. Try a colouring book or similar from the £1 shop wrapped up ?

Sorry, but the party bag is the highlight of the party. Pointless - yes and YANBU in hating them.
My DC are now 15 and 13

Stick a pack of Haribo, balloon, piece of cake in a coloured bag. Takes 5 mins, costs barely anything. Kids happy.

I know the dilemma - I don't like the 'expectation' of them.
But i do remember going to parties and being very excited about a 'going home present'. Perhaps one small wrapped present or a going home lucky dip would be a good idea?

Can we ban the damn things altogether it'll be so much easier

I think (hopefully) as all the children that would be coming, are my friends children, who I've know for a long time (as I never bothered with baby groups etc,) I could maybe get away with it, what being near Christmas and having moved house in the last month..

Think it'd be harder to not do when DS starts nursery / school.

Mmm, I shall ponder see what my purse tells me to do

I hate party bags too but kids abdolutely love them. I think it's the done thing to give something at the end of the party though. You dont have to put much in there. Sweets and and something from the pound shop will do.

No, don't bother. I have absolutely no intention of doing party bags and the more I'm told that children expect them the more I shall dig my heels in! I'd rather spend the money on the party itself which is treat enough without little begging hands outstretched afterwards.

I do sweets for them to take home ( so I don't have to deal with the sugar rush ) usually a tube of Smarties and a piece of the birthday cake.

I think they're nice and they cost pennies - I spent under a fiver on bags and contents.

Give 'em what they want for an easy life, I say :)

YABU and will be considered a miserable cowbag by every child at the party. Go small and cheap, but hand 'em out. They are beloved.

stick by your guns..

but be prepared for kids to ask you outright where their party bags are.

The best ones I've seen were books - I've seen little kids get Mr Men books (clearly a set split up!) and older kids get Roald Dahl books. Much nicer to have something to keep.

So many people disapprove of party bags! Why not just issue an invitation to a party with RSVP at the bottom and a note saying 'There will be no party bags'. That way, you might have fewer guests turn up so it would be cheaper but, if you were to start a new trend, the stupid fashion might tail off.

YANBU. I loathe them and the expectation of them.
DD is mortified by my attitude [shrug]
One party I took her to she recived a black bin bag full of tat. I was so cross, I left it in the car park when I went to collect her.
Another party she went to, the going away present cost more than the one I'd got for the birthday girl.

I bought a job lot of small cotton drawstring bags and some fabric pens. They can decorate their own bags to keep them occupied for a bit and then I'll probably put in a bit of cake or plastic tat something for them to take home.

I personally don't see the need for them, and quite dislike the accumulation of plastic tat and sweets.
but all the dc I know, including the polite, non-grabby ones, would be miffed if they didn't get one. Surely a children's party is about making sure the children have a nice time, and like Christine says you can do a job lot for a fiver.

It's shocking how many people feel obliged to do a party bag, especially when they have hired a venue or something!

Yes but you can give the children a great time by hiring a hall/feeding them/entertaining them etc. Why do they have to be given a present for attending a party and having a great time? It really annoys me actually.

Quite, GwendolineMaryLacedwithBrandy (very subtle name, by the way)!