To be shocked by woman who dropped off baby at nursery this morning

[Ipad2iloveyou]

She had the baby, who must of been around a year old, strapped in the car with the adult seat belt nothing else, no car seat, just the adult belt!!!!!!! What was she thinking. The nursery is a good 10 minute drive from anywhere as well !!!!

YANBU, shocked at the amount of people on here that think it's no big deal

I'm with ninky, entropy, holly and every other poster of that persuasion.
I wouldn't do this - dangerous and illegal whatever the circumstances. I would do this in a medical emergency, but doubt that would involve going via nursery.

Really?

I wouldnt do it. I hate seeing people do it and I see it a lot. Parents safely belted up in the front, kids bouncing around in the back of the car.

I have been known to wind my window down and tell people that 'your baby has got out of his car seat - did you know?'

Its not ok.

I have already got one dead child. Fuck me if I would risk another in that stupid way.

And putting a seatbelt around you and your child is NOT ok and NOT safe.

Loads of people around where I live take their babies/toddlers in cars without the correct and often any car seats.

Where I used to live, about 60 miles away, I can't remember ever seeing a young baby or toddler being driven in a car without a car seat but in my new town its all the time. In fact, I'd say almost every time I go to the supermarket I see a family with unrestrained children in the car. It makes me really irrationally angry, its my pet hate.
I can't imagine being that lazy about my childs safety, especially when I see them and they are in reasonably expensive cars so (presumably) they are hardly on the bread line and can't afford a car seat.
Its something that the local police are trying to tackle because they know its a problem in the local population but I still see it often.

I'm stunned that people think there is any excuse for doing this. Especially 'the car seat might be in another car' . Carseats aren't there to only use when you can, they're there to save lives. A taxi would be marginally safer because at least you can sit in the back and attempt to restrain the child a bit yourself.
I appreciate that sometimes there is no easy option, but when the options are 'be late for work' or 'put child's safety at risk', I am amazed that anyone would ever choose to put the child at risk. In any circumstances at all.
No halo here either, just some common sense.

Personally I would see if this mum does it again, it may of been a one off, her dp may of taken the car seat and she may of been shitting herself driving to nursery hoping to god nothing happened along the way and that noone noticed when she pulled up that her child was in a normal seatbelt, if you notice it us a regular thing then I would mention it to the nursery.

We only have one car, so I don't know for sure, but if you did have two cars, wouldn't you have car seats in each one?

Why does it being a one off make it okay? It doesn't stop other cars crashing into you or make the driver safer. AFAIK cars don't have notices flashing on them saying this is a one off so you can't crash into me .

Hey - ho... Surely as it is so unsafe and illegal, then the OP should have rung the police with the license plate and shop the other mum there and then - or the OP becomes complicit in the act, making herself just as bad as the offender in sanctioning unsafe carriage of an infant.

If you saw someone shoplifting would you shop them, or breaking into a house etc.... is it just motoring offences that people make allowances for?? perhaps because everyone breaks those laws from time to time...... parking, speed, tailgating etc.....

It's legal in a taxi because having a seat is too inconvenient and because lots of money would be lost if taxis couldn't transport kids without seats. Taxis are no safer than other cars.

I don't think this is a big deal by the way, and I think cries of "report her to the police" are way over the top.

My DH went to work a few weeks ago with the car seats in his car - we had to bus part of the way to school and walk the rest, DS was late (only 10 mins) and DD and I had a very long walk home & back to school again later as I had to save the return bus ticket for hometime. Hard cheese, sucks to be us etc.

I could have had a taxi for what one return bus ticket cost me, £6. The reason I didn't get a taxi? I didn't want them in ANY car without proper restraints! I'd have maybe chanced it with DS (5yr4mo, 20kg and tallish) but definitely not with little DD (2yr9mo).

And OP, did it occur to you to mention the lack of car seat to the lady and ask her if there was anything you could do to help? If nothing else it might have shamed her into thinking about how dangerous the situation was...

This thread has got me thinking - we're going to asia with dd (she'll be 11mo). Getting an airport pick-up and have requested that they bring a car seat. Not 100% convinced that they will (not a legal requirement where we're going), so what would be the best thing to do? At 9mo, her head is almost at the top of her stage 1 seat, so doubt it will fit in a couple of months.
a) hope they bring a seat
b) do as the romans, and cross fingers, clinging onto DD
c) panic

cookingfat, is there anyway you can take a carseat with you? think that owuld be the best option :)

blimey how did we ever survive before all this nannying state intervention

Slightly fewer of us survived....

What restraints do people use on the bus? I must be missing something? The buses I've been on have none, have metal bars at the top of the seatback right at toddler head height when you are holding your child on your lap because the bloomin things are packed , and have people standing right beside you in the aisles too... that is if you can get a seat at all - seems a lot more unsafe than a car or taxi.

entropy i think i love you

I actually can't believe the amount of people who think it's OK to put a child in a car without a carseat. Not only is it dangerous, it's illegal and there's a fine of up to £500. FFS if you really need to go anywhere with a child that small, put it in a buggy and take a taxi. The fare will be cheaper than 500 quid!

Loads of people where I live have small children bouncing around in the front and back of cars. It does shock me.

Mind you the last child road fatality I read about locally was a child who was run over by her own mother's car reversing. No car seat would have helped there.

I would hope it was an (unfortunate) one-off OP, for the reasons cited above. If you see it happen again, a word to the nursery would be a good idea.

I never did anything like this when mine were small, but I can easily imagine the circumstances where it might have happened. Professional job +no car seat +important meeting= horrible dilemma

OP how the hell was a 1 yr old strapped in with an adult seatbelt? The seatbelt would be over their face surely and as if they would sit still for the journey and not be crawling round the car?

Being a one off doesn't make it right but these things happen and I think to report the women to the nursery and/ or even the police for one time is wearing your judgey pants a bit too tightly, I live in a rural area and the amount of farmers,and travelling families driving through the lanes and roads with kids and dogs all hanging out the windows or perched on the back of a tractor holding on to the door to keep it shut etc is remarkable, anything goes when the summer arrives around here and do the police stop a large travelling party on the roads with kids and dogs hanging out of the windows, do they heck!!!! But that's another thread altogether!

Slightly off topic, but what about taxis? Surely, toddlers journey with just an adult seatbelt or?

Whenever I've been in a black cab they have either an elevated middle seat or a seatbelt adjuster so at least the child doesn't have the seatbelt over their neck. Also I have sat in the back with them so could make sure they stayed in their seat

I wouldn't have taken the risk, for sure. My MIL works for TRL (the road transport research lab) and over the years, I have heard some very upsetting stories about unrestrained babies and children involved in accidents.

For me, it's simple - no seat, no travel.

While I'm on this - once your child moves to a booster seat, get one with a high back and wings at head height - boosters with no backs are useless - in a side collision, they offer no head support at all.

we may have survived no car seats in the 80's but i nearly fell out a moving car at 3yrs old. i'm more than happy to have my 3yr old strapped in properly to an age/weight appropriate car seat every time he's in a moving car, or not drive anywhere.

how can life get in the way of the safety of your child? i can't imagine any bizzare set of circumstances where the safety of my child in a potential death trap is not the priority.