DP picking and choosing children

[TiarasTimeOutsAndTantrums]

Had a bad night, up every hour with DS or DD. DP was out until half 11 ish, got up at 6 this morning, went to the gym and picked up DSD. They got back and DSD was telling DS they were going to the park. I thought great I can settle DD for a nap and catch up on the housework.
Wrong. DP will only take DS with him and DSD if I go as well so now I have to drag out over tired DD so that DS doesn't know his dad can't be bothered.
Or am I in the wrong for not wanting to go to the park? I'm tired, I feel like crap and there's a huge pile of ironing and beds to change

Blimey, I was mildly understanding of the tosser man in my last post. I thought he might be scared of taking 2 children either because he had had an failed attempt before or because he didn't have the confidence to have a go. Seems I was wrong. He is quite a charmer, isn't he?

Just as a matter of interest did his last girlfriend kick him out due to his attitude to her pregnancy?

He's now told me its because last time ( the only time) he took the 2 together DSD bumped her head and DS wouldn't leave the park. Or something like that. He has fucked off all afternoon with DSD and only came back for her dinner, put her to bed and has gone out again

I'm sorry but what a prick.

He uses the no confidence excuse as to why he's never changed DDs nappy or looked after her alone. He's completely useless tbh

And you have two children with this selfish man, why?
I don't go into Relationships, so I don't know the backstory.
Are you going to try and change the dynamics within your relationship, or call it a day and ask him to leave?

I would stop examining his behaviour and look at your own. You cannot change the way he behaves but you can change your own. You can look for answers as to why he does what he does but I think it's a waste of energy. Accept what he does and respond accordingly. Don't just react, telling him off, shouting - state your case and how you feel without commenting on him.

Why can't you assert yourself? He only uses excuses becasue you accept them, acquiesce - stop. Go out - leave the house and DC with him. Don't ask him, tell him.

He sounds like a waste of skin.

Tiaras, you are getting there bit by bit every time you post. I threw my ex out probably about 70% because of the support I got here on MN. It is as though a constant stream of support and acknowledgement of what a shit your H/P really is can honestly change your mindset. Knowing that hundreds of people are like at his behaviour helps you to really see what you are putting up with.

My ex never once got up with the dc, not once, he changed about 10 nappies all told with both dc, he would go out and disappear for days and days at a time, he did no childcare whatsoever and in an argument about taking the kids out on his own he actually threatened to kill me . I was terrified of him and his threats I really was but it was all empty, it was hard to get him out but I did it and I knew I was doing the right thing because I had hundreds of non related people looking at my situation with fresh eyes and telling me just how awful it was.

He threatened to pick DS up by the ears earlier when he blew a raspberry. I've had it. He's leaving and I've just started a new thread on relationships about how to start again on my own!
Thank you everyone for the replies