to want to smack dh in the face?

[colliwobble]

turned down sex for the first time (been married 15yrs). it is day 7 and still dh wont talk to me, what ever sympathy i had has run out. he wont let me explain my reasons because i didnt have any good ones one the night??? err..free will, theres one - so annoyed I dont want to talk to him either, but weve 2dc's that need their mum and dad to behave like grownups.

My Dh has Aspergers. It wouldn't even cross his mind to behave in this way.

OP you have a right to say no without giving a reason. It doesn't matter what the reason you don't want to have sex is or even if there is no reason you have the right to say no.

That last post of yours just makes your 'D'H seem even worse than your original one.

it was a bad drink fuelled decision to say - 'no' but it came out of the blue and i hadnt put any case notes together or planned a speech before the dreaded incident and i didnt put my case forward very well. I will be paying for a long time for my defiance

Colliwobble - :( I feel really sad for you, this is no way to live your life. You can say 'No' anytime you don't want to do it, you don't need a reason, you don't need to put your case forward or plan a speech :( Paying for your defiance - there aren't enough sad emoticons to convey how I feel, there really aren't. I gathered things were pretty bad - but not this bad. Do you want to get out of this 'relationship'?

FirstVix - just join in, the more you do, the more you will get used to it. It's not compulsory to be helpful and we are all helpful in different ways anyway - don't worry about it - Just Join In :)

I hope you're being tongue in cheek.

ninkynonk - yes 'pay for my defiance' was tongue in cheek. it is what it is. Im sure good will come out of this as he finally knows how i feel. the only way is up (or out).

Dawndonna- Ive known lots of people with aspergers over the years, most were lovely, as im sure your dh is. I just think my dh finds it hard to see any other perspective than his own, which does not combine well with some of his less favourable attributes.

but he does have a good side. Ive painted him terribly but he cant defend himself on here so i should stop now before karma bites me on the ass