to be irrationally irritated by how long and when dp chooses to use the toilet?

[JjandtheBeanplusPud]

Every single fucking night, ds just in from school full of energy, dd eager to see him bored from a day without him. Soon tiredness hits them and the arguements and fights begin.

Slightest whiff of this and off he slinks with my ipod touch and disapears, so far tonight its been 1hr 14minutes!!!

He is currently off work due to a serious health issue (mobility wise NOT bowels!)

I ask him time and time again could he please not abandon me at the hardest point of the day EVERY day and he still does this has been since ds was a baby!

He's even started going upstairs as downstairs he can hear them going on and its "annoying"

And he always comes down with a nice dig or criticism about me raising my voice, not having dinner on, letting them watch tv --so I don't lock them in the shed--

He's not usually so frigging frustrating but I feel one day ill just implode with frustration about this petty little thing!

I know I abu but its the same at bath and bedtime too!

YANBU to be irritated, it seems excessive and unfair.
Tomorrow, as soon as he comes in from work - take yourself off to the loo with a nice magazine....?

I have never understood why people don't just crap and go! I can't imagine anything worse than reading or such on the loo. YADNBU.

Tomorrow - go out for an hour or two (on your own and taking iPod touch with you)!

He's not at work he's off whilst undergoing hip and knee treatment leading up to an op, he's a builder so can't work. So he has ALL day to do it!

He's just surfaced with his usual rant and asked "wtf do you think your doing, the kids need dinner" I replied "I know I have something frozen" meaning bolognese or chili I cooked previously and he flipped and threw dds toy pram! I think we might have a bigger issue, right now I hate him.

Yuck, hide your iPod touch or run the battery right down so it gies flat on him. YANBU.

Have you posted about this before? Or was it some other poor woman?

YANBU but if he's been doing this for years why are you letting him get away with it? Madness.

He demanded dinner and then threw a toy pram? He sounds a charmer

x-post

Er, yes, I'd say you do have a bigger issue.

My DH does this and Omg makes a stink as well. I have never worked out why it takes him upwards of 30mins (so far hit a record of 1hr 20 at which point I asked him if he'd died in there) to poo and i can do it in an instant.
Its worse now he takes his htc in with him. I've started sending 3yo DS in either to demand that he needs a wee or enquire 'daddy what doing' over and over. Which is especially funny as it was daddy who taught DS how to open the lock from the outside with a coin

Not his dinner, we'll eat later as had a late lunch, basically he assumed I was waiting for him to do it, I wasn't but, um why shouldn't he do it?

dream there's a chance I may have, its a HUGE issue for me. Petty as it seems. That extra pair of hands when a 3 and 4yo are irritable and I'm pregnant and want to heave non stop would be great!

He's being a wanker. Ds just went postal at him and told him he's horrible. Lovely we are turning into one of those familys because he needs an hour of angry birds.

I'm tempted to smash the fucking ipod!

Head him off....YOU dissapear....nip out and shout "Off on an emergency errand....your kids are awaiting your attention!"

And go...for at least an hour. It's not on...him doing this!

Hmm not sure his overlong toilet visits are the problem here. poor you

Op he sounds quite horrid. Entitled and aggressive. Self serving too.
YANBU.

Ewwwwwww hide your i pod for starters!

Blimey, YA def NBU.

He sounds like a wanker.

He sounds awful. Does he contribute anything to the relationship? The family? The bills?

Has he always been like this, or could it be something to do with waiting for treatment / health issues/being in pain?

ladyintheradiator

Mine goes on the bog for at least half an hour when he gets in, also when the children are eager to catch up with him. Or need to brush their teeth before bedtime and he's in there. His even more irritating habit is running a BATH at bedtime when I'm trying to get the kids down. No, you WON'T just have a SOAK now, you'll help me get the kids sorted so we can eat at a sensible time. No health issues.

Having said that he is USUALLY very good. He has the rep of being a long suffering NEW MAN but people don't know about these particular habits.

(Caps are irritating aren't they. I jsut couldn't help myself.)

YANBU

My Dh does this too, although not on the scale that yours does. He will disappear randomly to the loo and take up to 45 minutes, playing on his iphone. What annoys me is i don't have the option to just go off and sit upstairs and read a magazine for 45 minutes, he just assumes I will provide childcare during that time.

And as for your DH moaning at you for not doing tea, I would tell him loudly to go and fuck himself.

AbbyAbsinthe surely even if he was having a wank it wouldn't be 80 minutes!

He certainly appears to have problems though - encourage him to see a doctor... oh and YANBU he's an idiot.

Fred

If he's at home all day can't he prepare the evening meal for you and the kids so it would be one less chore for you?

He sounds a knob.

I hate iPods/iPads - Angry Birds is the work of the devil!

Gingefringe I totally agree about ipods, ipads and Angry birds!

Sounds like there are a few issues going on. The best thing to sort out acting out type behaviour in kids is ATTENTION. Ask him/tell him to take one of the children and read him a story / go through homework with him / play a game. Take turns with each child.

Start as you mean to go on - this is an absurd habit he's got into.