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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not visit cat I am looking after today

36 replies

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 11:34

My friend had to go home at very short notice last week for a funeral. I am looking after her cat - I pop in every day for an hour or so, play with her, check food and water, change litter tray etc.

I have had flu and woke up this morning with my chest quite bad. I have a chest infection and this morning have been coughing until I vomit. I feel very weak and ca't eat. It feels like someone is sitting on my chest. Today is a holiday so no public transport and it will be a 30-40 minute walk there and then back again which is normally no problem. I could get a taxi there and back, but I have very little money just now.

The cat has plenty of food and water and does very little in her litter tray as I think she just sleeps between my visits. She will come to no harm at all if I do not visit. I don't want to phone my friend and say sorry I can't visit X today. In the past she has went away and asked me to come more than 24 hours after she has left (e.g. leaves Monday evening and I come in on Wednesday)

Would it be ok to not visit the cat today? I REALLY don't think my friend would mind at all - she would be a lot more worried about me I think. If I am still as ill tomorrow then I could get another friend to come to my house, pick up keys and go to cat, though with public transport its only a 20 minute journey there then back so I will manage regardless of how sick I am,and also she comes back Friday so only need to do tomorrow and Thursday.

OP posts:

Floggingmolly · 01/11/2011 11:38

No, of course not, the cat will come to no harm whatsoever. Unlike yourself, if you don't take proper care of yourself. Stay in bed, hope you feel better soon

depob · 01/11/2011 11:42

And the cat won't tell your friend either.

catgirl1976 · 01/11/2011 11:44

The cat will be fine for 1 day - if its any longer get someone else to drop in a feed and water him. Get yourself to bed.

squeakytoy · 01/11/2011 11:46

I am going to say it is unfair. Your friend is relying on you. The cat could have knocked its water over, trapped itself in another room..

I would contact your friend and explain the situation to her, she may say "dont worry", which is then fine, but she may be able to arrange for someone else to call round.

Sossiges · 01/11/2011 11:49

I reckon the cat will be ok for one day, you sound rough though, get thee to bed.

NellyMelba · 01/11/2011 11:49

wow, and you still have the energy and desire to log on to the internet, even at deaths door. Impressed!

WhereYouLeftIt · 01/11/2011 11:50

If it were my cat, I would be fine with you not going today, and would probably tick you off for endangering your health if you did. My two were perfectly unbothered at being left to sleep in peace, and it is extremely unlikely that anything untoward could happen between your last visit and tomorrow.

Original poster

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 11:52

lol - I am not a man . It is only flu!!!!!!! If there was public transport I would be fine to get there and back, I just can't do a one and a half hour walk.

Cat does have 2 water bowls so even if one is knocked over she is fine water-wise until tomorrow. Same with food. I just feel guilty as I know she is lonley and looks forward to me coming

OP posts:

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs · 01/11/2011 11:55

YANBU about not going, I do think YABU to think the cat gets lonely though.
My two shittens don't give a toss about me or DD, as long as their food is out and the water bowl full they are happy.
Dont' get agitated about it, if you are still not well tomorrow you have a back up plan in the shape of your friend who, incidentally I would forewarn just in case.

ChooChooWowWow · 01/11/2011 11:56

I am going to agree with squeaky. I am sure the cat will be fine but in your shoes I couldn't not go (but then I am a complete nutter who would spend the next 24 hours working myself into a frenzy of what ifs).

catgirl1976 · 01/11/2011 11:57

btw - you don't have flu - not been mean but if you had flu you wouldn't be on the computer and you wouldn't be fine to get up and go on public transport

am sure you feel very ropey but trust me - thats not flu :)

catgirl1976 · 01/11/2011 11:57

being i mean

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs · 01/11/2011 12:05

I was going to post that about the flu catgirl, then remembered that I told DD I was going to try to be a nicer person. You are right though.

Original poster

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 12:06

I don't want to tell friend as it is her mothers funeral tomorrow :( :( so it is not the time to be calling her telling her about cat. It always happens with a holiday though - many of my friends that I could ask to come round, take keys and see cat are away (though many back tonight/tomorrow morning) To be honest I would want to ask my friend was she ok with a stranger coming to her flat. I am the only person with a set of keys and catsit for her regularly.

The cat in question is gorgeous. I found her starveing and pregnant a year ago and she went through 3 different homes until this person (who is now my friend :) ) rehomed her permanently for me. She has so much character but is very cat aggressive so it had to be an only pet home.

If my neighbour is back later he may take me as he has a car. He is not in at the moment though.

OP posts:

DejaWho · 01/11/2011 12:08

Practically - it depends what food the cat's on. Can probably get away with it if it's fed dry and the bowl's down for it to graze on-demand, if it's wet-fed - then nope.

Cat may well get lonely - not all cats got the "I am the cat that walks alone" memo - mine is very much one that needs HER humans/slaves around and would get upset.

catgirl1976 · 01/11/2011 12:08

Sorry - it wasn't meant to be mean. I just used to say "oh i have flu" - then i got flu..........actual flu is horrendous. Hope you get well soon OP.

MrBloomsNursery · 01/11/2011 12:16

hahaha, flu and sitting on the computer? Man, you don't KNOW what flu is!!!

Can I just ask what you would have done today, if you didn't have the "flu"? There still would have been no public transport and you still wouldn't have had enough money for a taxi? ....

I think you're being selfish. I'm not a big fan of cats, but you've been left responsible for another person's possession. You should do the job properly.

Original poster

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 12:30

I did say I HAVE HAD flu [sticks out tounge] - I am recovering! I had a high fever and muscle pains etc etc last week but those are gone now. I was a lot better over weekend as was out and about as normal, but maybe now have a secondary infection. I am not going to die - I am just coughing up loads of green gunk and general muscle weakness. And dizzy from my head being stuffed. Lying on my sofa full of flu remedy I feel quite well - its only when I start to cough or get up to go to the loo I realise all is not so well.

One of my (Scottish) friends years ago kept saying he was 'fine' until he phoned me from hospital where he had been admitted with pneumonia - and he was kept in hospital for 2 weeks. I looked after his horses for about 3 months until he was back on his feet. I am not particularly ill, but I won't make it there walking.

I am feeling REALLY guilty about Ms Cat - but the day is young and a friend has just messaged me on FB - so she will come and do cat if I ask (but then I feel bad letting stranger have keys etc)

OP posts:

ilovesprouts · 01/11/2011 12:32

the cat will be fine for one day .egnore the catty remarks on here

Conundrumish · 01/11/2011 12:35

What a nasty bunch of replies! YANBU but I would try and run it past your friend so someone else can help

KurriKurri · 01/11/2011 12:38

YABU - In my day when we had flu, we visited ten cats before breakfast, tore up old rags for toilet paper, polished the coal and still had change out of a farthing.

Pull yourself together at once.

Jajas · 01/11/2011 12:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrBloomsNursery · 01/11/2011 12:49

SkinnedAlive - Can I recommend mashing up about 3 cloves of garlic and eating them with a spoon, or put them in some hot water and drink the water about 3 times a day. I did this last time out of dispair because I didn't want to get a phlegmy cough after the flu and it worked brilliantly. I woke up next morning with no phlegmy chest.

Original poster

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 12:55

What is the ten pound test???????? I think I would fail any test at the moment (including my exam next week, sigh). Or is it as in ten pounds sterling? Or ten pounds in weight?

Thanks MrsBlooms - lots of garlic in this house and I love it. I HATE antibiotics and will only take them as a last resort.

Maybe I am being pathetic. My mum (a nurse) used to rant that Dr's are the worst patients and complete hypochondriacs.

OP posts:

Original poster

SkinnedAlive · 01/11/2011 13:32

Hurah - neighbour home and will run me over in his car in 10 minutes :) His wife offered to do cat for me which was sweet of her, but it is no time at all by car and cat will just have to put up with no playing today - only the basics.

OP posts:

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