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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this nurse really didn't know what she was doing

57 replies

whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 09:59

Last week DD2 (2.5) fell and gashed her forehead.

Took her to the minor injury clinic and they said it warranted some attention.

Anyway she was good as gold, lay on the bed let the nurse clean her up etc. Nurse then said she would put some glue in it, it may sting a little, she was on my lap, well as soon as the glue touched the cut DD screamed and threw her hand up to her head and rubbed the cut, and rubbed the glue into her eye which glued her eye shut. DH and I then had to hold her down while they bathed her eye open. By the time they had done this she was hysterical, had busted the cut open again but wouldn't let anyone near it, so we had to leave it open, nurse gave us some steri strips to take away.

I just thought this was an unfortunate incident but having mentioned it to a couple of people they have said you have to be so so so careful using glue near children's eyes and that this had not been done properly, normally you would steri strip first and then put the glue over the top and make sure the child's arms were held firmly. If the nurse had said, "right this will sting quite a bit so hold her firm for 10 seconds by which time the glue will have dried" we could have avoided the whole sorry incident.

DD won't let anyone near her head now even just to clip her fringe out of her face.

The nurse was mortified and I imagine has learnt this isn't the way to do this in the future, but I am pretty annoyed DD (and me) had to go through this.

OP posts:
ScarahStratton · 31/10/2011 10:01

My finger was glued first then steri-stripped, DD2 had glue, then steri-strips when she cut her eyebrow open cycling into a brick wall. I imagine she thought you'd have a good grip on her, she did say it would sting.

VFVF · 31/10/2011 10:03

But the nurse did say it would sting?

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:04

yes but there is a difference between "this may sting a little" and "this is going to bloody hurt so grip her very tightly"

OP posts:
colken · 31/10/2011 10:04

The nurse might well have thought that the parents would hold their daughter but they should have been told to hold her firmly.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 31/10/2011 10:04

"sting a little" is code for this is gonna hurt like hell.

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:05

I was holding her and holding her arm but I didn't have a total vice like grip as hadn't realised how balistic she was going to go, toddlers can be very strong when they want to, it took me and DH to hold her down between us to get the eye bathed open.

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 31/10/2011 10:05

The nurse was mortified and I imagine has learnt this isn't the way to do this in the future, but I am pretty annoyed DD (and me) had to go through this

And YOU have learnt to have a firmer grip on her if you ever have to do this again.

Mistakes do happen - why is it the nurses fault? She said it would sting.

You are looking for someone to blame - it was an accident.

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:06

Amazing I will know that for the future

OP posts:
januaryjojo · 31/10/2011 10:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:07

Valium so the nurse is completely blameless is she? I had no idea it would hurt DD as much as it did, maybe I was lulled into a false sense of security her having been so good having it cleaned but if I had known this, I would have had DH and I holding her down before they attempted this.

OP posts:
agedknees · 31/10/2011 10:08

I have never heard steri-stripping first, then glue. What would be the point?.

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:08

*January" that is what we should have done...surely the nurse should have said make sure you are holding her very tightly before she attempted to do this.

OP posts:
Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:09

Aged i don't know but that is how one of my friends told me she does it who is a paediatrician.

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 31/10/2011 10:11

OP I think you were both to 'blame' - she could've made it clearer and you should've held tighter as you had been told it would sting. It's unfortunate but accidents do happen. Complain to the clinic if you really think she is to blame :)

agedknees · 31/10/2011 10:11

I would imagine if you steri-stripped first, then glue you would make an awful mess and not achieve a nice clean fit of skin. This could lead to scarring??

MrsOzz · 31/10/2011 10:12

But you just said you were holding her arms down, just not vice-like. The nurse would have seen you holding her arms, and so didnt tell you to 'hold her arma' because you already were! She did also warn it would sting.

Accidents happen, you didn't hold your daughter tight enough, the nurse didn't tell you to tighten your grip and your daughter was the one who got it in her eye (I know she is only two!). So blame all round I think!

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:14

I am not going to complain both the nurse and I have learned a lesson, it was as you say an accident but it is annoying as it could have so easily been avoided...I think it will probably scar now as a result but she is little and it will fade.

OP posts:
cory · 31/10/2011 10:15

The thing is people experience pain differently and children behave very differently when they do feel pain. Dd would go into hysterics at the slightest twinge whereas ds was totally stoical. I had a relatively high pain threshold as a child, my brother had a low one (and was far more likely to go dramatical over even a very slight pain). It's only the parents who can know the individual child- and even they can't always know.

The nurse can't really have known how much your particular dd was going to react: it is quite likely that most toddlers she gave the same treatment did not go ballistic. If someone had said "sting slightly" I would have thought of that as a kind of average- this is how most children react- and tightened my grip on dd but contented myself with an encouraging smile at ds.

HildaOgden · 31/10/2011 10:16

I think that all the adults may have been lulled into a false sense of security by your little one being so calm up to that point.If she had been a wriggler,I'm sure the nurse would have been extra cautious about you gripping her.

It's unfortunately one of those split-second things that ,in hindsight,could have been handled better by all.

I hope your little one is ok,and in regards to her not letting anyone near her head now...maybe buy her a brand new hairbrush and some spray and let her do her own hair for a week or 2,to give the memory a chance to pass?

januaryjojo · 31/10/2011 10:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

borderslass · 31/10/2011 10:19

DD1 now 20 cut her forehead open a cm above the eye at 18 months when she fell on a feeder cup. She had to be held down by 3 of us whilst they stitched it.

Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:20

January where have I blamed the nurse for the scarring, I think what I said was yes we were both to blame and have learned a lesson, it was a shame for DD and fact it will probably scar but I haven't said that is all the nurse's fault......

Hilda thanks thati s a good idea about the hair brush.

OP posts:
Original poster
whoneedssleepanyway · 31/10/2011 10:23

I take it as well that all of you saying it is my fault and nothing to do with the nurse, would have been completely chilled out about your child's eye being glued up and not felt that the whole situation could have been handled a bit better on both sides....?

OP posts:
neverever · 31/10/2011 10:23

Yabu, also if the glue was put on after the steri strips the glue would not be able to seal the wound adequately, also if the strips were pulled during washing or whatever the glue would come off with them as it would be on top so don't know who told you that.

hope your dd is ok now.

larrygrylls · 31/10/2011 10:28

Sorry, but nurses cannot have it every which way. They are either professionals or they are not. If they are, then they should know the risks of working with glue and should have given very explicit instructions to the OP as to how to hold her daughter so she could not move.

Every time I have taken either of my children to a doctors or to A&E, they have always shown me exactly how to hold them when they were being examined or treated. It is completely unacceptable to expect an emotional parent to anticipate eventualities when they consult a "professional".