to expect DH to help me correct the way kids speak?

[hwjm1945]

We live in London but are not Londoners, 2 DSs are at school and come home saying "fink" for think and "fought" for thought and and "featre" for theatre etc. Now I don't mind a regional accent and in fact we both have ones of our own, but I can't stand sloppy pronunciation and I think this is what this is ( or fink). I correct the children, in a jokey way, DH refuses to do so, saying that they will grow out of it. I don't think they will and actually think he just wants to avoid having to pull them up, as we have this a lot, with things like table manners etc, will they grow out of it or will it becom more ingrained? AIBU to think DH shuold support this?

I hate constant correction of children's speech.

It doesnt help. It can cause problems.

I had a friend who insisted on doing it to one of my DCs all the bloody time. The fact he has LDs, ASD and an auditory condition didnt register with her at all.

I was bloody glad he could speak.

IMO is ok to remind older children that street talk etc is not ok in mainstream society. There seems to a be a cross over that didnt exist when I was younger. We kept it outside. We didnt want to share it with adults.

Kids dont do themselves any favours when the rock up to an interview and start with the 'innits' and 'cha' 'like' 'y'know'

I dont think anything is to be gained from jumping on a 3 year old if they say a word wrong or get the grammer mixed up.

IMO is ok to remind older children that street talk etc is not ok in mainstream society. There seems to a be a cross over that didnt exist when I was younger. We kept it outside. We didnt want to share it with adults

Absolutely agree with that.

I asked the teachers at my local Infants School if they pick the kids up on their speech and they said they kind of repeat it back to them in a not so obvious way.

So if a child said "I like buhher on my toast"...the teacher would say "Oh yes, I love butter too"

Instead of simply saying "So do I"

There are very subtle ways of letting a child know what's correct and what isn't without making them feel awkward about talking.

We live in Essex and I HATE HATE HATE the local accent (am North-Western and proud) but I don't correct DD saying barth, parth, glarrs (much as it grates) because it is the way that people talk darn sarf and that is where we live. I do, however, insist she pronounces her middle t's as otherwise I (and others) can't understand her - bu'er, wa'er, Pe'er etc. I also correct her grammar, but not in a 'no, no, that's wrong' way, I tend to repeat what she's said back to her in a questioning manner but phrased correctly, i.e. 'them ones over there' 'what, darling, those ones over there?'. I'm hoping that repetition will sink it in eventually...

One thing I have noticed is that when she goes to her (expensive and largely attended by middle clarss children) holiday club in the summer is that she comes back saying 'yeah?' as a kind of comma in her speech ('and then Sophie, yeah?, she said we should all make posters, yeah?, and we got that glue that goes rubbery, yeah?')we That I stamp on immediately as it is hideous and makes her sound like a right divvy :).

There's a strange divide round 'ere (E London). Some children speak street, and others speaker posher than their parents. Especially the girls. Have noticed both my boys doing this. I have no idea why it is.

Squeaky, my DH says somefink, nuffink etc and it drives me mad. My mum always believed that you are judged on your speech and although RP was not expected I would have been pulled up for that as th is not f and g is not k.

yabu to some extent.

Your dh doesn't feel it's an issue. It's hard to be constantly pulling your kids up on something that you don't feel strongly about.

I think you should just accept that you are the SpeakPolice in your house.

I have a "nothing" accent (the one your parents sometimes pay for ), and my partner has a Northamptonshire accent, which, to my ears, sounds like a cross between a Londonish accent and a "countryside" accent. My son speaks with a localish accent (we are in Northants now), but it's not a very recognisable one, unlike Geordie or Brum. Sounds like his dad more than me.

When we lived in Birmingham, he had a very strong accent, which I quite liked, but he lost it very quickly when we moved over here when he was seven, which was bit of a shame, I thought, as it had real character and wasn't just an accent, but a dialect - had different actual words in it, IYSWIM.

I don't like "lazy" either, like "fink", but I do like a regional accent.