to be pissed off that DH has just had a takeaway delivered for himself, just as I did not cook dinner tonight?

[jigglebum]

DH feels cooking is part of "my job" as I have been a SAHM for most of the last 3 years. However, I now work 2.5 days a week, am nearly 8 months pregnant, have a 3 year old and still do the majority of care of DS and all the housework, washing and cooking. He goes to work, does DIY and baths DS when he can be bothered to get in in time.

This week I really have not felt like cooking in the evenings (have lost my appetite really) but still have done most nights. This evening I am knackered so thought I would wait and see whether DH would step up to the mark (he does sometimes!) I am upstairs , he is downstairs and I hear him order take out - for himself only!!!!! I would not care but he always is negative about take outs when I suggest them on a friday as he does not like to waste money. I also did the weekly shop yesterday so there is plenty of food choice. My DH is a selfish pratt I think most people would agree!

Im off to get some toast for dinner.

good idea Maryz (the last bit)

He is a knob and my DH wouldn't even dare attempt to do that. I wouldn't cook his dinner tomorrow night either

Get there first and eat it. If you've got room ! He is a selfish git and think he's trying to make a point. He obviously picked the wrong woman to do it with. Time for a priorities and sharing roles chat.

He'd be wearing his precious takeaway if he were my DH.

You need to ask him why he did that. You really need to have a serious talk with him about it.

I have dd1 (3) and 7wo twins - dh arrived home to be told he's going out to get a chinese tonight. dd1 had a sandwich as she ate at nursery today and I've had an emotional day with dtds and some family news to deal with. I cannot imagine dh behaving like yours.

Just told dh about your post - as he was putting on his coat to go and get our take-out. His response? Oooh I'd get shouted at if I tried that! My response? Darling, you'd get your take-out in your lap if you did that!

He is bu but in that you are pg, he's seriously crossed the line!

Wtf? I mean, I am seriously at that, what an incredible arse!

He did what?!

Ensure you are first to the door when the take away arrives then shout 'Ooooh, thanks darling, so thoughtful' as you run upstairs, lock yourself in the bathroom so he can't get any and scoff the whole lot yourself.

Meet it at the door thank him and take it upstairs and eat what you can-leftovers in fridge for him for tomorrow-how mean of him!

I am fairly calm in truth, as it is not atypical of him. I did go down and say nice of you to ask me what I wanted - he said he assumed I did not want anything (it is true I have not been eating much in the evening but he could bloody well have asked). I also mentioned that fact that we aren't usually "allowed" takeways (waste of money he thinks) but that was ignored.

Increasingly quite aware I am married to a twat but sadly find it easier to ignore it and get on with my (and DSs) life. Arguments are never productive as he is always convinced he is right - he is very self righteous about his way of life. Perhaps I should show him this thread!!

Selfish bastard. In our family, nobody would ever order food for themselves without checking if anyone else wanted to eat. Even if they were fairly sure they didn't.

If you have a spare moment this evening, could you perhaps clean the inside of the lav with his toothbrush?

could you not say that when you "assume", you make an ass of u and me both

Well that takes the [hbiscuit] for Unhelpful Observation of The Evening.

mutt I agree and I never said I was surprised by his behaviour if you note. No communication is not our strong point as he is always convinced he is right so I give up trying, as I get emotional and lose the discussion. My communication skills in general are pretty good thanks.

Does he have any redeeming features and benefits?

My goodness Mumsnet is full of knobs this week. OP go and ask him where yours is, and demand he order you one! What a selfish prat!

He is being a complete twat, there is no mistake about that, but I really don't understand the total lack of communication. Do you speak at all? You waited for him to "crack" and do some cooking for once, he either assumed you didn't want anything to eat at all or decided to be a cunt and order himself a takeaway to teach you - which it was is open to interpretation. But why did this situation even arise? why didn't you say to him "I am really tired and don't fancy cooking tonight. Would you make either something for us or order a takeaway" and then he would have done one or the other.

x posted with all of the above. still stand by what I just typed though.

Fair point Georgimama but I think I just wanted to see what he would do really if his dinner was not cooked for him and it was obvious I was not going to do it. I wanted to believe he would step up and do it without having to be asked - ie he is an adult and should be able to make intelligent decisions without being asked always.

Has he ever "stepped up"?

i would cook when you can next be bothered but dont give him any, tell he you assumed he would sort himself. he sounds incredibly selfish.
and now either order something in for yourself and tell him hes paying or go out and leave him with the children and eat out.

twunt is my verdict.