to be upset that there are no photos of me

[sunnysunchild]

In MIL's house? I'm no oil painting, but still, Ive been married to her son for 8 years, and we have given her 2 grandkids. We even had a family pic done a couple of years ago but its not to be seen anywhere.

She has photos of her own beloved children (DH and his sister) everywhere, (and goes on constantly about how attractive they both are), pics of DH's sister's wedding (of said sister and her new DH), and and one obligatory pic of her 2 grandkids.

I'm not crying about this, Its just bugging me quite a bit, when we go to visit... Would you tackle it? but surely if I do it sounds like I'm whinging.

DH just pulled this face when I mentioned it once -

Give her a photo calender and if she doesnt use it ask for it back.. She will soon get the message.
I cant stand those Adams family shots very naff imo

I'd be miffed too, but I have wafer-skin.

Hecate speaks sense here, IMO.

Agree with Hecate. I panic is I have a photo of my sister up and not my brother, I worry that I actually have NO pictures of my mum at all, we have thousands of DS1 but very few of DS2, so I only put an equal amount up.

On the other hand, no one should feel obliged to put anything on their own wall/cabinet that they don't want to look at every day, and your MIL might LIKE you OP, but maybe she just doesn't want to look at you every day. Do you have any photos of HER in your house?

I'd be a bit miffed, but I'd do as Hecate says in her earlier post, that's MIL's Christmas present sorted!

I'm sure my mum swaps photos round depending on who's visiting!

YABU- would be better to tackle your own insecurities.

My MIL is exactly the same - she has one picture of me up and DH at our wedding but half of me isn't even in the picture! She has about 3 of DH's sister and her husband's wedding which was the year after ours.

When DD was born she put lots of pictures of her up, ones of DD and DH and now one of DH's sister, her husband and my DD in a family group.....but not one of me and DD or me DH and DD. I think that what she would really like is for my DD to be DH's sister's DD. Actually she makes no secret of this fact. She is not a very nice woman and for some reason has a massive problem with me since having DD. It is very reflected in lots of these silly little things like not putting pictures of me up.

If it bothers you, you should say something, although don't expect it to change anything. I asked my DH to say something and he did. Nothing has changed and my MIL still refuses to take any pictures of me or display any so it's obviously not going to change.

Really wish I hadn't used the word "Tackle" in my op.

Realistically, I am not going to ever mention it to her

It bothers me as our relationship isnt in my opinion, a bad one, I am just bemused really.

Maybe I really am as ugly as sin and she doesn't want to look at me - thanks those that suggested that.

Thanks for those responses with sympathy and experience.