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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be angry with nursery

53 replies

tibywibs · 17/10/2011 20:23

So i'm on my way to collect my daughter from nursery and I saw some of the children and staff walking down the street. (not unusual, they often go for walks) when i get there i find my daughter on sat on a nursery nurses knee, crying. It turns out that ALL of the children who attended nursery on friday had gone out to the fair. As my dd was doing half a day, she was left behind in a room full of sleeping babies. They say they tried to phone me to say she'd be in the baby room but they obviously don't have the right number (i changed my number last year and they have called me on it since.)
i am so upset that they either didn't wait 5 mins until i collected her or asked me to come early or even offered to take her if i paid the extra fees.
she was sobbing and all weekend she has told me that her friends left her. I want to let them know how disappointed i am that an establishment that is supposed to care for children could be so insensitive.
Am i being pathetic??

OP posts:
RebelFromTheWaistDown · 17/10/2011 20:26

Never mind

Original poster
tibywibs · 17/10/2011 20:28

so how would you handle the situation rftwd?

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 17/10/2011 20:30

As my dd was doing half a day, she was left behind in a room full of sleeping babies.

to be fair, she hadnt been left behind for very long...

Dirtydishesmakemesad · 17/10/2011 20:30

I think you are being a little bit oversensitive. My dcs did half days and ths does happen. Children who are there all day need to have the day planned around them tbh.

WhoWhoWhoWho · 17/10/2011 20:30

Perhaps they are full on the half day she doesn't attend and therefore couldn't offer the option of her doing a full day and going along?

Why didn't you take her along to go on a ride or two after nursery? I'm assuming this was an option as you say you would have paid the extra nursery fees.

If she is old enough to understand then explain how she did/can do something else nice and that there will be other trips. If she is too young for explanations then surely she could have been distracted?

academyblues · 17/10/2011 20:31

It sounds ill-planned by the nursery. I would ask to speak to the manager and express your concerns about the way this situation was handled and say that you'd like to be informed about any trips or treats in future so that you could opt to pay for your child to be included.

FunnyHaHaPeculiar · 17/10/2011 20:31

she was only left for five minutes, hardly traumatic

NickNacks · 17/10/2011 20:31

YABU

She'll get over it but not if you turn it into a drama.

academyblues · 17/10/2011 20:32

Tbh, I'd actually be more concerned about them not using the correct phone number though.

RebelFromTheWaistDown · 17/10/2011 20:34

OP 'never mind' is what I would say to the little girl. It's the answer I give to my DDs whenever they are pissed off about small things.

thisisyesterday · 17/10/2011 20:34

it's annoying that they didn't tell you in advance, and concerning that they couldn't get hold of you.
that's what I would be cross about.

the other stuff? not so much. maybe they HAD to leave at a certain time. they can't all sit around waiting.. what if you had been late? they went when they had planned to go, and that is fine IMO.

when you're at nursery part time you do miss out on some of the stuff, and it's unfortunate that in this case your daughter knew that she was missing it... but I don't think it's anything worth complaining about tbh

cjbartlett · 17/10/2011 20:34

I'd be very surprised if she'd mentioned it all weekend
Children tend to forget very quickly
How old is she?

Original poster
tibywibs · 17/10/2011 20:36

she is just 3, and we did go to the fair later on that day. it wasn't the point of going to the fair though. one nursery nurse said she sounded heart broken when the rest of the children waved bye out of the window!!

And maybe its not traumatic to be left for 5 minutes. but it would have been less traumatic for my daughter if they could have waited the 5 mins and not left one child out

OP posts:
ChippingInToThePumpkinLantern · 17/10/2011 20:38

She was left there for all of 5 minutes. Really, in the nicest possible way, you need to get a grip. Why should a whole nursery wait until you pick DD up before they go out? There was no reason for DD to be that upset if it was handled better.

However, they could have told you this was happening and if they had the capacity to take another one, ask you if she would like to go (if you paid for the other half a day).

The only thing I would do is to say to them that if any other things like this come up you would like to be informed & given the choice for her to attend if it's possible.

thisisyesterday · 17/10/2011 20:39

yeah they coulkd have done it a bit more sensitively

made a big deal about her going to do an activity in another room, then taken the rest of the kids out WITHOUT waving through the window at her, and then just waited til you came to get her

cazzybabs · 17/10/2011 20:40

sorry think you are over reacting!

thefirstMrsDeVeerie · 17/10/2011 20:43

I can see that you are upset but it is really not a big deal.

Please dont make it into one.

I do mean that in a kind way even if it doesnt come across that way.

RitaMorgan · 17/10/2011 20:44

You couldn't really expect her whole class to hang around waiting for you, could you?

She was going home early, so couldn't go out with everyone else in the afternoon. Don't see the huge problem really.

chicletteeth · 17/10/2011 20:45

So, you want them to plan to, dress and toilet appropriately etc.. the rest of the children who went, to placate, one child; your daughter?

HELLO!!!!

If they had all those children there and ready to go, but you weren't there, would you actually expect them to have to manage those other little kids and wait around just for you?

Get a Grip!

Also, get your phone number lark sorted! Far worse in my opinion.

chicletteeth · 17/10/2011 20:46

Busted keyboard and too many commas in the first sentence

babyheavingmassofmaggots · 17/10/2011 20:46

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Fixture · 17/10/2011 20:46

YANBU

catsareevil · 17/10/2011 20:46

It does sound unusual for a 3 year old to be so upset by something like that that they would cry about it for the weekend, they would usually forget about something like that more quickly.

I dont think that they nursery did anything wrong (apart from using the wrong phone number, though even that was a call they didnt really need to make, as she wasnt leaving the nursery).

babyheavingmassofmaggots · 17/10/2011 20:47

Oh arse. All that time doing pretty graphics and I lose it when it posts.

Arsebiscuit.

You're making a mountain out of a molehill.

SauvignonBlanche · 17/10/2011 20:48

YABU about fair trip but I'd be annoyed about the phone number.

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