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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that houses do not come with an after sales service??

240 replies

TiaMariaandDietCoke · 13/10/2011 13:42

I'll try to keep this short. We sold our old house and the buyer moved in at the end of June. He's a single guy, just a couple of years younger than us. During the run up to the sale he was a bit of a PITA, we had to do lots of hand holding etc and his parents kept coming to the house to 'measure up' (never measured a damn thing) and would spend HOURS chatting with me and not showing any interest in the house at all.

We put up with it because he was willing to wait for our new build to be ready before he moved in, so that saved us the cost and hassle of renting. We also felt a bit sorry for him as he's just starting out for the first time, so left him quite a lot of extras not included in the sale of the house to help him out, chased up his solicitor for him when things stalled because he 'didn't know how to', left him loads of info about the area, who his neighbours are, when the bins are collected, left him food and a welcome to your new home present and card - basically anything we thought would help him settle in - he was very pleased!

Now I'm begining to wonder if being so nice was a mistake. He has my mobile number and has sent texts on and off all summer asking daft questions about the house, all of which I've answered and have even called him to talk explain stuff in more detail when he's been confused. He's also turned up unannounced at our new home which we didnt give him the address of and we dont know how he knows where it is for no particular reason, dropping off junk mail that he 'thinks is for us' Confused so far, irritating, but no big deal really.

until monday night, when his mother turned up at our house unannounced and barged in asking me to come and sort out his bloody heating! Shock There's nothing wrong with the heating, just he's not sure how to programme it to suit his working shifts.

me: "didn't he read the manual?"
her: "there is no manual"
me "err, yes there is - we handed it to you along with everything else - and I left written instructions because you asked for them - and there are instructions on the control unit itself"
her "oh, yes, so there is - well, can you come and do it anyway?"

now, this woman was not taking no for an answer so I stupidly agreed that DH and I would nip down for 10 MINUTES tonight to sort it. This was after me offering several days that I could come down and her saying that no, that time/day wouldn't suit. He wanted me to come then and there, or preferably on saturday evening, because that would suit her best. When I told her I had plans this weekend and couldnt come, her response was "well, that's not very convenient for poor DS" Confused ffs!!

The house, by the way is in great condition, heating system is only a few years old as as simple as they come - its not like he's struggling in some old run down house with quirky appliances!

AIBU to think they are extracting the urine, or am I just being a bit of a Caah? I'm of a mind to set the damn timer for him and then make it crystal clear that we will not be coming back and he needs to sort things out himself from here on in - what do the MN jury think?

OP posts:
hester · 14/10/2011 09:54

Love your style, TurkeyBurger Grin

We bought off a couple going through a bad divorce. We turned up at 12 on moving day, to find them, their kids and all the furniture still there. We hid ourselves away in a room upstairs (very grateful we'd organised childcare for the day) while they screamed at each other downstairs. Their dd came to join us and lay in our arms, weeping gently. At some point the vendor's identical twin brother came in to apologise 'on behalf of the family' that the place was so filthy.

They went at 7pm, leaving loads of tatty, falling-apart furniture behind. (And unbelievable filth.) They drifted back in and out over the next few days, trying to persuade us to keep said tatty furniture, then desultorily hoiking it out when we refused. We sat with our boxes around us, unable to really get started.

The oven didn't work. The dishwasher didn't work. The front door fell off because they'd hung it on dainty cupboard hinges. At one stage they had started building a garage but when the neighbour complained (they were driivng pipes through his wall) they tore the whole thing down, leaving internal wiring exposed on an outside wall and debris everywhere. Worst of all, their other dd left us a leaving in present of racist and sexually explicit graffiti all over her bedroom wall. Lovely.

By contrast, the flat we had just left had been thoroughly cleaned on our departure. We had left a welcome letter full of local information, a yellow pages, some takeaway menus, a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates. Oh, and our new address. We never heard a word from him - nor did he forward any of the the mail that kept arriving (Royal Mail mucked up the mail redirection). I don't expect people to keep forwarding mail for ever, but I think allowing a few days grace is a nice gesture.

Ooh, I feel so much better having got that off my chest Grin

NorfolkNCovern · 14/10/2011 09:57

Can I have 31st? There will be trick or rewarded at his door and he won't know what to do.

Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 11:33

Toria - wow - thats worse than my man-child - he did ask if a particular picture in the livingroom would be included in the sale Hmm but that's about it (that said, we did leave all the white goods for him)!

Will update the bets list shortly (I'm at work!) - I'm really disappointed that no-one has bet on 'never' - so you're all sure that i haven't got rid of man-child then?!?? Maybe TurkeyBurger has the right idea then.... Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 11:44

hester - what an awful situation - the poor daughter (the weeping one, not the graffiti one!)

OP posts:
nickelbabe · 14/10/2011 11:52

ah.
when I bought my house it was mainly a shell.
wouldn't even know who the vendor was.

they did leave me a telly and a settee-thing though.
Grin

(yeah, I know, I'm just shamelessly marking my place)

woodleydoodle · 14/10/2011 11:57

Is anyone else thinking possible learning difficulties?

PigletJohn · 14/10/2011 12:08

"Never"

You have learned your lesson.

babyheavingmassofmaggots · 14/10/2011 12:14

No woodleydoodle. Not at all!

Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 12:17

awww, thanks piglet! Grin

OP posts:
KatieMortician · 14/10/2011 12:20

No woodley. We're thinking Oedipus complex.

WhereYouLeftIt · 14/10/2011 12:53

woodleydoodle - would that be on his parent's part? Nah, I'mjust thinking Extreme PFB.

RantyMcRantpants · 14/10/2011 13:22

The thing is he isn't PFB, he is the youngest and the other are daughters, Tia mentioned it up thread. So very much Precious Last Born and spoilt Man Child.

Pandemoniaa · 14/10/2011 13:40

I'm thinking, rather gleefully but quite unfairly, that this one might run and run (not that I want you to suffer any more grief Tia!). So am now positively glued to the thread because you simply can't beat a good house buying/selling story.

Ex-h and I bought a house that had originally been owned by the Home Office and used to house screws Prison Officers from the nearby Prison. I say this as an attempt to justify the behaviour of what I assume were first time vendors - they were both in their 60s. So they'd bought the house from the Home Office and stayed in it until they'd owned it long enough not to have to pay the difference between the discounted price and the market value. 5 years to the day they put it on the market and started to buy a bungalow in Dorset.

The vendor had taken great pleasure, over the years, in "liberating" items like curtains and carpets, presumably when newer stuff was fitted in the prison. So the carpets were truly institutional and quite the vilest I've ever seen. All had a weird coating that gave off a plasticky sheen (presumably to reduce stains) and none of them quite fitted the rooms. Curtains were similar. This didn't stop the vendors attempting to charge us hundreds of pounds for them. We politely refused and also refused to pay a similar amount for the hideous dining room furniture. Fortunately, we had the sense to get our solicitor to put this in writing.

On the day of completion we moved in to find all the carpets, curtains and furniture still in the house. Within a week we'd had new carpets laid throughout the house and the old carpets taken away. The filthy, horrid curtains were binned on the day we moved in. Three months later they had the nerve to write to us and ask for £900 for the items they had left behind. Our solicitor kindly told them to fuck off but to feel free to collect their dining room furniture at a time that was mutually convenient. We heard no more from them.

Friends had a much worse experience. On the day the sale of their house completed they arrived with their removal van to be greeted by the vendor's family happily sat in the kitchen eating lunch and listening to the radio. Of packing there was no sign. When (politely) reminded that the sale had completed, the husband said cheerily "Yes, we know. But you can't move in today because it'll take us at least a week to pack and move. Can you come back next Friday?". Solicitors were telephoned, terse conversations were had and with a very bad grace the vendors started slowly packing things onto a handcart which, with the aid of a bicycle, was all they thought they needed in terms of removals. They were about a week, as it happens, but after 2 days my friends lost patience with the constant toings and froings, changed the locks and said they could collect the rest of their stuff from the shed. Access to which was only via the back gate.

Just what is it that brings out the loon in people when buying and selling houses though?

WhereYouLeftIt · 14/10/2011 13:42

Ah, forgot that. Mind you, I have known a few people who loved the baby stage so much that they seemed to spin out their lastborn's baby stage to the max, knowing that there were no more to come. I guess manchild's mama's probably one of them?

RantyMcRantpants · 14/10/2011 14:01

WhereYouLeftIt I concur. D'ya reckon his sisters hate him Grin or are they part of the molly coddling?

WhereYouLeftIt · 14/10/2011 14:08

I expect his big sisters snurk a lot, regarding 'mum', 'rod' and 'back'!

Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 15:37

WhereYouLeftIt has it in one - I met one of the sisters and she was sensible, independent etc etc - total opposite. Seemed quite embarassed by the helicoptering of man-child. Grin

Pandemoniaa your friend's story reminds me of man-child's move. He wasn't actually involved... He went on holiday for a week - to some family I think - while the helicopter parents moved his stuff in, bit by bit, via their car. According to man-child he moved in about 10 days after the contracts were exchanged, once his parents had him "all snug" Hmm

I really hope the cosmic wishing that was debated here a few weeks back doesn't actually work - with all you lot wishing man-child to continue torturing me to death with daft requests for the entertainment value, I'll have no hope of a quiet life!! Sad Grin

OP posts:
plupervert · 14/10/2011 15:45

You have met not just his parents but his big sister as well?

Hahahahahahaha.

You are far too involved with enmeshed in this person's support network!

Have you sent them a letter and invoice yet?

Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 15:52

Bet update:

KatieMortician Thu 13th when he gets home (thankfully wrong!)
BlueCat2010 ? Today ? 14th
ScarahStratton - 2 days ? 15th
caramelwaffle ? 2 days ? 15th
kungfupannda - between 12 and 4 on Sunday ? 16th
PrivateBenjamin 7.30pm on Sunday ? 16th
WitchesBrewIsMyFriend ? next wed ? 19th
bintofbohemia ? a week ? so 20th?
Onemorning - A week or so ? around 20th
NorfolkNCovern - 31st
PigletJohn "Never" (I love you!)

Pandemoniaa - "that this one might run and run" Sad please, please be wrong!!!!

So this weekend seems to be the favourite then... :( if he does turn up I'll Pm his address to anyone who's interested in the drip feed mobbing! For those slightly further afield, don't worry, you can join in as well- I have his mobile number too! :) [evil emote]

OP posts:
Original poster
TiaMariaandDietCoke · 14/10/2011 15:59

plu - oh, I could write a book. he arranged a viewing at one point (i think it may have been one of the 'measuring up' ones, I can't quite recall.) Two cars pulled up. Out get man-child, both his parents, his sister, his sisters friend and his DOG. The dog stayed outside.

The sister and her mate (who clearly didn't want to be there) left after about 20 minutes. The others stayed for over two hours. To this day I have no idea why they were there, because after showing the sister and her mate around the house, they went into the livingroom and stayed there the rest of the time. Hmm they did mention at one point that the aunt was supposed to come too, but couldn't make it. (She did come a week or so later though).

They had several viewing where they came around 7 and left after 10pm. I remember asking at one point whether they had actually moved in already and just forgot to tell me. They didn't seem to understand what I was talking about!!!!

OP posts:
Sidge · 14/10/2011 16:23

I bet he calls you (or Mummy and Daddy call you on his behalf) at between 1700 and 1800 on Sunday 16th.

Onemorning · 14/10/2011 16:43

Can I change my date to the 23rd? It's a Sunday Grin

Smellslikecatpee · 14/10/2011 23:36

Pandemoniaa OH MY GOD, you poor friends. . . .

Tia I reckon the 30th, mid afternoon

Jux · 15/10/2011 00:40

He's going to call at 3am this morning when he gets in from a night out clubbing and the house is cold..... Grin

MissTapestry · 15/10/2011 11:44

I can't stop reading this thread! When we bought our house there was loads of crap left in the shed. DP had a clear out a couple of months later, and found several home made truncheons- metal pipes wrapped in leather.