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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To spend so much on ds for his birthday

171 replies

yippeekaiyay · 10/10/2011 12:44

Ds (age 5) has never really been one to play with toys. He likes to be on his bike/scooter/trampoline/playing at shooting basketball hoops etc.

When indoors (rare) he likes to play on his wii, dsi, paint/draw/colour in and watch films (I have got him in to all the films I loved as a child - neverending story/labrynth/drop dead fred etc)

Asked him what he wants for his birthday and he replied he wanted an xbox 360 with kinect. Its really expensive, so I am considering getting the xbox for birthay in november and kinect and games can come off santa

My mum thinks think is completely ott and ridiculous. That it is far too much to spend on a 5 year old and I should buy him somethingh for £20-£30

AIBU to want to buy him what he actually wants?

OP posts:
gordyslovesheep · 10/10/2011 14:15

I don't make them share bikes and scooters no - but then they are nice childhood items that encourage healthy exercise - over my rotting corpse will they have a laptop before they are 13+ - they can damn well borrow mine or use the family PC - that way I can limit their useage and monitor their access like a sensible parent

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:18

Gordy you cleary know very little about limiting usage and monitor accessing (like the sensible parent you think you are) if you think they need to use the family pc for you to do this.

Oh dear.

See, here you go again! Nice childhood items like bikes are also prevalent in this house and they are used regularly too.

Keep 'em coming, I'm sure you'll trip me up somewhere.

notso · 10/10/2011 14:18

Chicletteeth I think the picture you have painted is of you, your DH and your DC all sitting on your different computers because it's easier is a bit sad.
You will probably argue that this is not the case but this is the only reason I can see for so many computers in one house.

pictish · 10/10/2011 14:19

First of all I want to say he's YOUR child, and it's YOUR money, so my opinion matters not a jot....BUT I think you are setting him up to be a very spoiled little boy.

Why shouldn't you buy him what he asks for?

Well, because £300 is a ludicrous amount to spend on a five year old, who prefers being outdoors, ignores the incredibly expensive games console he already has, but most of all because he shouldn't grow up thinking he's just entitled to get what he wants no matter the cost.

I'm sorry to say I think you sound like a bit of an airhead.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 10/10/2011 14:20

I think an Xbox would be wasted on a 5yo tbh. My own ds has one and loves it, but he's almost 11.

You could spend thousands on a child and not spoil them, but him destroying things (it's irrelevant that they're failrly inexpensive board games) doesn't sound great. Controllers for example are bloody expensive, even 2nd hand. I'd be waiting at least until he demonstrate that he's able to look after things.

PenguinPatter · 10/10/2011 14:20

We have an x-box and kinect. The x-box is DH. The kinect and some games were brought for the DC. The DC - now 6, 4 and 2 do occasionally play on it. The youngest is obviously a bit young.

I had visions of long winter evenings after school playing moving games on it last year - didn't really happen though have had some fun couple hours Saturday mornings while hanging round waiting for things - just not as many as we thought.

Maybe it will get more use this year after school - its gets dark to early to get down to the local park and back after school and not safe on our street to play out.

As too much ? depends on your income really.

caughtinanet · 10/10/2011 14:21

I must be living in a paralell universe - your 5 year old already has a DS, a wii, a camcorder and a digicam and you are wondering if he should have an xbox as well?

When does he have time to use all these and do all the outside stuff and go to school ?

forrestgump · 10/10/2011 14:23

Do wonder if you plan on trading in the wii as he wont miss it, then in a few months he won't miss the xbox in a few months either. Sometimes it's a case off too much too soon?

Squitten · 10/10/2011 14:23

Well, spoiling aside, I think if he already has a Wii and still prefers other activities, that tells you that an X-box would be a bit if a waste. But it's your gift and your money - do what you like!

And whoever mentioned Fashion Wheel - OMG I had one of those! Just had a very nostalgic Google :)

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:25

notso

Ha ha. 45 minutes a day and we don't have TV.
Do your kids spend 45 minutes a day watching tv and/or playing other games? I'll bet they do.

My husband and I work during the day (am off today) so why you think we all sit around on different pc's in the same room, I'll never know.

We have loads of computers, most are kept for spare and repairs which is what he's going to do with the old computers we've bought for them for christmas. They do not know they are getting them either. IF you don't know much about computers and don't work in the field, then you wouldn't understand I suppose

It is much much easier having lots of computers, mine and DH's are work notebooks which can't be used by anyone other than us.

Tell me, if you were knitting for example, your DH was reading a book and one DC was watching a DVD and the other was say, playing a computer game, why (assuming it's the lack of interaction your judging) is this worse than all four people being on computers

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:25

you're

notso · 10/10/2011 14:27

I don't make my DC share bikes, they are different sizes so it wouldn't work and we go on bikes all togather as a family so one of them would have to run along side if they shared a bike.
They do share a scooter though, it's hardly a problem.
It just seems like a waste to have stuff just because you can and it's cheap, but I suppose I'll never understand as we can get by with one PC for the five of us, and I intend it staying that way.

minimisschief · 10/10/2011 14:29

Well from someone who got given consoles from the age of 3 from my unlce i do not see the problem with them.

The wii is more of a child friedly system. however if like us you have one and it just sits there then there is no point having it.

The xbox360 is a great console and something he would enjoy more when he is a teenager. however it will probably be obsolete then.

There is no point him getting tons of little things if he isn't fussed about them. So if he enjoys playing games which btw if you shop around you can get many educational, family friendly and puzzle type games which are really good.

I wouldn't worry too much about him being stuck inside all the time which many are suggesting because you know your child and you can limit how long he plays on it if need be. i am sure it will not impact on his childhood in any way like it did not impact mine. i managed to play games, play games with friends as well as bomb about in the outside world causing mayhem.

i do not recommend a kinect though, theres hardly any games for it and like the wii it is a gimmik people and kids get bored with.

gordyslovesheep · 10/10/2011 14:30

I don't :) you will see from my post they also use my laptop - read before you jump :) I just don't want them having sole access to a laptop at age 9 and 7 :) if that's okay with you like :)

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:31

Notso work computers aside, I can safely say that we would have trouble with one computers for the five of us (that doesn't include my nearly 2 year old who clearly doesn't use one).

We could make it work the same way I could manage without lots of things, I just choose not to.

Why is it a waste if it gets used?

I only use my mobile phone for a few minutes each day, is that a waste too? What about my camping gear, that gets used once a year for a few days, is that also a waste?

Seriously, I just don't get people's interest in what other people do and don't have.

My husband is constantly stripping the computers for extra bits etc and then rebuilding them again at a later date.

Tell me, how much stuff do you have in your house that hardly gets used?

Chundle · 10/10/2011 14:32

I can't believe he is 5 and has a wii and a ds! Bet he has a Tv. And DVD in his room as well... What on earth will you be buying him for his 10th birthday!
Family time doesn't mean time on the xbox!! Ever tried walks in park, bike rides together etc etc

WoeIsMeAgain · 10/10/2011 14:33

I should point out that he is extremely destructive.

why are you rewarding him then?

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:34

Indeed gordy it's fine with me, as long as you don't just imply assume that you are the only sensible parent because of this.

If you choose your children not to access a laptop which can have as much or as little connectivity as you choose, if you know what to do for monitoring purposes, that is your choice

Grin
forrestgump · 10/10/2011 14:35

Is it your sons 5th birthday or 6th, sorry I've just realised you said he was 5, but I wasn't sure if I read your post correctly, and it meant he is turning 5.

gordyslovesheep · 10/10/2011 14:35

Chundle my guess would be a mini moto Grin

notso · 10/10/2011 14:36

Love the way you assume because I don't love computers I knit!
My kids do go on screens of some sort, I didn't say they didn't. Why is it easier I just do not understand. I can see why you would have a work one and a family one. DH has a work one that work gave him so DC and I don't use it. I just can't see how having one for each DC is easier even if they do like different games.

gordyslovesheep · 10/10/2011 14:36

it is indeed and I am happy with that choice - which is why I am not in the slightest bit defensive about it :)

HeadlessForHocusPocus · 10/10/2011 14:37

I came on this thread to see if there would be a bunfight over a spolit 5 year old, and I'm leaving it feeling sad as I never got a Mr Frosty either :( Grin

chicletteeth · 10/10/2011 14:40

I don't assume you knit notso, it was an example of an activity you could be doing alone.
FWIW, I knit (which is probably why that example came to my mind); just finished scarf for DS3 and am part way through scarf for my other two.

If they each have one, they sit at table together and either play their own games (or DS1 does homework) or they sometimes play interactively instead of watching TV.

It is easier for me.

What can I say, you don't get it, that's fine, but it's not weird or wasteful as you earlier implied.

seeker · 10/10/2011 14:40

You're getting him a xbox so that he spends more time indoors? Is that bizarre, or am I somehow missing something?