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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to beg my doctor for help.

58 replies

JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 09/10/2011 17:47

I'm fat, and I know it, everyday I hate getting dressed because I know ill always look shit, I've hidden behind being a mum for too long.

I'm 5ft 8" and weight over 20st I'm not sure by how much but last weigh is was 22 and I've been terrible since then.

I want to change but I've damaged myself to an extent that I can't see how ill ever be happy without food. I did slimming world for ages and did really well but due to 2 family deaths and 6months of homelessness I had a nervous breakdown and couldn't focus at all and slipped into worse habbits than ever.

I'm now settled, have a very supportive dp and two extremely healthy children, my weight problem means I'm ridiculously careful with there diet so its time I was with own.

Will my gp help me? I don't want surgery no way, I want guidance to be HEALTHY. I want to be more confident and I want my kids to be proud of me.

OP posts:
TimeForMeIsFree · 09/10/2011 19:37

laptopdancer It's a 3.5 mile round trip to the supermarket and I have a 35L backpack so I go every other day. I carried 8 pints of milk yesterday amongst other stuff and was knackered absolutely shattered by the time I got home. It's just over 7 miles to town so I only do that trip once or twice a week!! I feel great when I've done it though Smile

TimeForMeIsFree · 09/10/2011 19:40

Keep posting JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns and we will support you. I would love to lose a stone myself, damned Whole Nut chocolate keeps jumping into my back pack! You might be able to keep me on the straight and narrow too! Smile

squeakytoy · 09/10/2011 19:50

dont forget to add your exericise in, and keep an eye on your nutrition..

when I started my diet I would put the next days menu in, all my meals etc.. the day before, so that I could work out if I was on track.. it is no good putting it in after you have eaten if and then finding out you have eaten too much!.. you can then edit it as you go along too, and it really does work..

I have lost nearly 3 stone now in just over 7 months..

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 09/10/2011 20:24

That's brilliant squeaky!

This app is fantastic, I can really see it helping, I've set an alarm to ring the gp first thing.

And I braved the scales. 23st 5 1/2 lb which isn't as bad as I'd imagined but still 10st more than I want to be!

OP posts:
TidyDancer · 09/10/2011 20:26

I weighed about 19 stone at one point. I'm now less than half that.

Weight Watchers was brilliant for me. You can use it online and not have to go to meetings if you're not ready or it's not practical. Keeping a diary was also good. It helped me recognise my triggers for wanting to eat more. Emotions played a huge part for me.

I did use the Wii, but Wii Fit is utter shite for real exercise. It's a good starting point, but not great for real fitness goals. The best one I came across was Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum. A general increase in physical activity of any kind is good though.

Good luck. If I can do it, I'm sure anyone can! :)

squeakytoy · 09/10/2011 20:33

I find the wii fit ok to be honest. I do the stepping, and put a plank of wood under the wii board to make it a bit higher... half an hour of that has you sweating believe me..

The best wii game I got was Biggest Loser though, that really is challenging, and the Jillian Michaels shred is ok. (you can also watch that on youtube for free to see if you like it or not)..

TidyDancer · 09/10/2011 20:42

The Biggest Loser game is good, but it's not high impact enough if you're doing it for fitness. Fitness Ultimatum is a step up from that (it does remind me of Shred in a way).

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 09/10/2011 21:12

Tidy that's amazing, well done!

I'm gonna start doing justdance tomorrow as can borrow it for free, will have a look at the games you've recomended and rent them before I buy! So glad I didn't sell my wii now!

OP posts:
runningwilde · 09/10/2011 22:58

Good luck op - tomorrow is my D Day too x

heleninahandcart · 09/10/2011 22:59

Have PMd you with some ideas

spiderpig8 · 09/10/2011 23:13

I'd forget about diets and just focus on doing one lttle thing to improve your health, for example going for a little 15 minute walk every day or drinking lots of water of swapping one unhealthy thing you eat for a more healthy alternative.Just one small thing, that is easy to stick to.And then after 2 or 3 weeks when that becomes habit, add another little change.
baby steps, baby steps or it won't be sustainable.

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 09/10/2011 23:42

Thanks for the message running, good luck :)

Helen has given me a great groundwork to get me started, thank you :)

Spider- we eat a pretty healthy diet already, no junk so to speak just too much, going to cut down on carbs and swap white to brown where needed to begin with, I'm a total bread fiend!

My first ever Thanks to you all

OP posts:
TimeForMeIsFree · 10/10/2011 10:32

Good luck with your plan JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns Smile

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 10/10/2011 10:41

Jj, the boxing game on the wii is really good.

Bloody humiliating if someone walks in unexpectedly Blush. But good nonetheless.

squeakytoy · 10/10/2011 10:44

JJ.. brown bread is just as full of carbs and calories. If you want to get a good kick start, really cut down on the bread if you can. Its hard.. but it really does make a difference.

I did the first two weeks with virtually no carbs, and was amazed at how bloated bread of any kind does make you feel. I gradually reintroduced it, but even now I no longer eat anywhere near as much as I did before I started the diet.

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 10/10/2011 10:55

Swap bread for wholemeal wraps or pitta bread, much better !

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 10/10/2011 11:06

I have that one cheesetoastie will give it go today (encouraging dp to start running again so I can look like a twat exercise in peace)

I've just done the food shop and brought crackerbread and extra light phili and tons of salad to replace my sandwiches at lunch, also lean cuts of ham and chicken to have with salad. Going back to basis on sw of eating more veg, then protein and less or none if I can manage carbs.

Really appreciate all the advice

OP posts:
fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 10/10/2011 11:11

If carbs are your problem, then I really really recommend India Knight's Idiot Proof Diet as a good book to read. Even if you don't follow the diet, it's a very good book to get you in the right frame of mind to diet. I do think a lot of weight problems are caused by an addiction to sugar and and things like bread, far far more than eating fatty things are.

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 10/10/2011 11:23

fuckity (hehe like the name) I'm off to the library with dd in a min so ill look for it, if not amazon is my friend :)

OP posts:
fuckityfuckfuckfuck · 10/10/2011 11:24

It's a giant bright pink book, you won't miss it :)

squeakytoy · 10/10/2011 11:26

Another of my tips is to make up a huge bowl of salad that you can eat all day long. I would put lettuce, cucumber, peppers, cherry tomatoes, feta cheese, olives, celery, a bit of olive oil, salt and black pepper in a massive lidded pot and would have a bowl of that every hour and a glass of water. I didnt feel hungry all day.

TwoPeasOnePod · 10/10/2011 11:41

Just wanted to say, keep going, I am not currently very overweight but i have been bigger than i am, and just 20 to 30min of walking DD to school since Sept has already produced results (firmer legs, a tiny bit more stamina) so small changes definitely add up! It cheers me up too I'm sure of it, because i don't do much exercise apart from that. Fresh air and knowing I'm making an effort (even if it is a bit half-arsed most of the time)
This sounds patronising and I REALLY don't mean it to, but try cutting your portion sizes, and keep ridiculously busy for a few weeks to take your mind off that slight hunger feeling, and within a month or two you most likely won't even fancy a bigger portion any more. I used to eat twice as much as I do now, but have found a more reasonable balance and it just doesn't occur to me that i need more any more. Don't cut out treats becasue that path leads to binges and failure in my book..

Good luck with getting more cheerful about yourself (and you do come across as a v nice person) Smile and apologies if i've repeated what other posters said {didnt read every post}

loveglove · 10/10/2011 11:42

If carbs are your problem, then I really really recommend India Knight's Idiot Proof Diet as a good book to read. Even if you don't follow the diet, it's a very good book to get you in the right frame of mind to diet. I do think a lot of weight problems are caused by an addiction to sugar and and things like bread, far far more than eating fatty things are.

I've noticed a big difference since I cut out bread - and I don't miss it and I am a lover of all things bread. I think I must have the balance of everything right so I'm not craving bread like I used to.

TwoPeasOnePod · 10/10/2011 11:47

Just read Spiderpigs post, it's spot on advice. Maybe consider only eating bread that you have baked yourself? Makes it slightly less readily available (because it's a pita to bake Grin ) thus you might savour it more. 'Diets' are shit though, pointless, depressing usually, make you feel inadequate just because they aren't necessarily tailored to suit YOU and your lifestyle. For me, far better to reduce portion sizes, allow everything in moderation, aim for more proteins + veg. Mediterranean style of food suits me well for keeping myself feeling trimmer, too cold for that now tho (mince and tatties emoticon) Wink

Original poster
JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 10/10/2011 12:13

So far I'm going down the calorie control, move more, reduce portions.

I can't ban treats as that's what has and will keep making me fail and I want to be able to enjoy an ice cream at the beach with my children, I just need to learn control and moderation.

So far today, I weighed my cereal and measured the milk so I had a correct portion and grabbed an apple after the school run as I used to grab biscuits! About to do mine and dds lunch decided to do scrambled egg as its freezing here and I'm hoping it will keep me away from crisps/yogs etc as extra. Put it all through myfitnesspal so I know what's an acceptable amount, so I've about halved my usual portion (usually have 4 eggs and share with dd and 3 slices of toast, today I did two eggs to share and two toast) smaller plate method works too.

I'm going to walk and buy a melon later as that's been my weapon of choice for sweet cravings before.

OP posts: