to be a bit downhearted that men always seem to prefer my sister?

[theratherplainersister]

Bit of background. She is a 2 years younger and married. I am divorced but in a good place with that, quite like being single really. Neither of us have dc.

We go out together quite a bit and I would say we are probably of equal attractiveness. I love her to absolute bits. When we go out she is quite flirty and doesn't always volunteer that she is married, which if fair enough, up to her. I just find though that if we ever start chatting to anyone, they always seem to prefer her. I will be doing fine until she joins in and then without fail attention will turn to her.

Me and a couple of mates went out a few nights out, just a quiet drink and I got talking to someone, he took my number and all was good, dsis arrived and it became clear he was more interested in her, he hasn't called me but has found her out on FB and messaged her.

Sadly this is not the first time this kind of thing has happened and it all feels a bit crap really.

Yes men respond to flirts and your sister sounds like she's a very good one! Good for her as long as she's not leading anyone on or trying to take the shine off you which you say is not the case.

But also some people just have that x factor, we've all known them haven't we? Women (or men) that aren't necessarily great looking but have some serious allure about them.

Do you get the feeling that once she's conquered, what she has appears worthless to her, and that's what's happened to her with her husband?

No, I think she loves him very much, they seem very caring of each other, I think she just likes the attention and I know that she likes to be the prettiest one there. Very threatened by other attractive women.

Still not a particularly loyal wife, if that was my sister I'd be having words
can you imagine how she'd feel the other way round if her husband behaved that way.

you clearly behave with some dignity be proud of yourself.

Did you ever notice how you were immediately more attractive to other people when you were in a relationship than out?

That.

I think its the confidence of knowing you have another option.

My sister and I had the same group of friends that we socialised with (still do, but much less now), and it was always very clear who was interested in which guy, with the other being supportive/backing off; whatever was appropriate. I find your sister's behaviour quite unreasonable actually; she can see if you like someone and it really isn't on for her to flirt with that person. I think excusing her behaviour by saying "she can't help herself" actually gives her permission to continue behaviouring in a competitive, selfish way - she's feeding her ego with no concern for the impact on her sister. If she was my sister, I'd be having a serious word with her, and I'd also be doing some socialising without her (after all, there must be times she goes out with her husband, when you meet up with your friends).

As for her sneaking off the with the guy you liked, whilst you were in the toilet - well - that's really crap, and certainly not what you'd expect of a caring sister.

behaviouring? Behaving, obviously!