or is ds's teacher?

[MollieO]

Ds is yr 3. Has played piano at school since Reception. Every week someone collects him from his class for his piano lesson.

This week he started the cornet. First lesson today. I dropped him off, reminded him of the lesson time and told his teacher.

I get a call lunch time from school to say they are sorry but ds missed his cornet lesson as music teacher away and cornet teacher didn't know ds was due to start.

Saw teacher at pick up and asked why ds had missed his lesson if she and he both knew the time. She said that he was supposed to go to the lesson himself and should have asked at 10 to be excused from class from his lesson. She blamed him for missing his lesson even though no-one had told him he wouldn't be collected from his class and that he needed to tell the teacher (who already knew he was supposed to have a lesson).

AIBU to think that the teacher should have told him that unlike piano lessons he would not be collected from the classroom?

She said he is in yr 3 so should work it out for himself. I agree for subsequent weeks but if it is different from normal practice how was he to know if no-one told him?

Really? I find it a PITA to have random children missing 30 minutes a week, around 2/3 of my class have a music lesson. Hence the post-its.
Is it the teacher's responsibility? That's something the head could answer, and our head says no it isn't.

I have just started volunteering in a class and I think teachers have far too much on without having to remember every child?s music lesson (which they do though in infant but I am pretty sure they would not in juniors). Having now one foot in there, I think it should be compulsory for parents to spend a few days in a classroom and see what it is really like for a teacher. It has definitely been a real eye opener for me.

hocuspontas In the class I am at the moment the children constantly miss the same lesson I think it is actually quite unfair on the as they are actually missing an important part of the curriculum. I think it is great to give a child the opportunity to learn an instrument but IMHO the way it is done at the moment is not right. Our school offers violin, clarinet and guitar, there is no limitation on how many lessons a child can have which mean a child who would want to learn all the instruments, could in theory, miss 1 hourand 30 minutes of school every week and it is very difficult after that to catch up with the missed lessons for them. Now if doing only one instrument it is ½ hour to catch up with ?only?. Now the way I would catch up would be to shorten the break of these children 10 or 15 minutes 2 or three times a week but I am not sure a lot of parents would agree with that.

In my class (normal mainstream class of 30) yesterday-the following children went out...

3 from 9.15-9.45 (intervention gp)
2 from 10-10.30 (speech therapist)
4 from 10.15-10.45 (play therapy)

1 from 11-11.30 (numbers count)
1 from 1.30-2 (numbers count)
1 from 2-2.30 (counselling)
1 went home at 2.45 (hospital appointment)

As you can imagine-trying to teach whilst all this to-ing and fro-ing is going on is great fun, let alone trying to remember when it's all happening. I think it's the responsibility of the person coming to collect them to remember. There was obviously a breakdown in communication, but spare a thought for the classroom teacher who is trying to just implement the curriculum whilst all this is going on.

Just sounds likely slighty crossed wires to me.

No biggy, he knows he needs to ask now so get him to do that next week.

Sorted.

Why are you not upset with the music teacher?

they had 30 minutes of sitting on their hands.

iirc he's at a private shcool and the transition from pre-prep to prep can be a culture shock as they are expected to take ina lot of information , be more independent and to remember such things. Having said that it is pretty poor that the brass teacher didn't even know to expect him and come to find him when he didntl arrive. Make sure you aren't charged for this week but no real damage done. Is his lesson at a fixed time or does it rotate on a timetable each week? I used to write a note in the diary so the teacher could prompt them if needs be.

He's missed one lesson.
He and his teacher and his music teacher will know for next time.

Not the end of the world really, is it?

Yes he's now in junior prep. He did remember about his lesson but I think was too scared to ask to go and also expected to be collected. The brass teacher didn't know he was starting lessons, despite us agreeing with the music teacher two weeks earlier. 15 pupils not 30 and no one else having brass lessons from his class so not loads of disruption.

Hopefully things will improve this week but personally I didn't like her 'he should have known even if he hadn't been told' attitude. Fine if he had been told what was expected (ie to ask to excuse himself at lesson time) and had forgot then the responsibility would lay with him. I just found it odd that she didn't mention what he needed to do when we spoke about it in the morning.

She seems to be one of those teachers that isn't that interested in her pupils. We had one in yr 1 and had a terrible time. I'm disappointed that we seem to be heading that way again (not just me who thinks that, other parents have similar view).

I found it odd that he got detention for not running. He has hypermobile joints so gets tired in sports. She should know this as it is in his records. I didn't mention it but will if it happens again.

I've written notes in the homework diary that so far have been completely ignored so that is another issue to deal with. It is hard when I work full time and also away at times. It's unfortunate that things seem to happen when I'm away and don't always have access to phone/email during the school working day.

Teacher should have reminded him. End of.

When you told the teacher, she probably thought it was to remind her that her lesson would be interrupted.

And if he is usually fetched, why would she send him?

Isn´t it the "fault" of the teacher who didn´t fetch him?

Shouldn´t they have told him if he was now to take himself?

Or what is the back up for if that teacher is ill?

I´d concerned that he remembered but was too scared to say anything

It seems to me that the music lesson issue isn't the real issue here iyswim.
The other issues are more important and need addressing. And if this is the second time you have had concerns about a teacher in the school wouldn't it be an idea to look for another one?
Why did you choose that particular school?

"Teacher should have reminded him. End of."

I disagree. Poor woman was probably trying to teach her class at the time. That's her job, not chasing up numerous music lessons - particularly when they've all changed times. Over the course of a week, dozens of children go off to various appointments, as someone said above. He forgot. Fair enough, he's 7yo. The teacher also forgot (if she even knew about it in the first place). Fair enough to her too, she's extremely busy.

Get over it.

Also-I haven't got an LSA all of the time and I wouldn't send a child to a separate room alone if the music teacher hadn't come to collect him. There might be nobody there to greet them-they might become confused and wander around alone. Then the parent might complain about them being alone in the school and lost and whether the teacher in charge was negligent, then post about it on a forum such as this :o

I think if you are this unhappy with the school and you are a paying customer you should look at taking your business elsewhere.

My sympathies are with the teacher on this one; if a child is deemed mature enough to take up the cornet then I think he should also be sufficiently mature to ask the teacher about his lesson.

I'm a teacher and although parents may tell me that X has Y at whatever time it doesn't mean that I will necessarily remember at the time. After all, I am paid to teach the children, not to manage their diaries! Arrangements for things such as music lessons change all the time so although the class teacher was aware of the cornet lesson time in theory, she may not have been completely au fait with the expectations for collection/sending a child out.

As for having a teacher who, "isn't that interested in her pupils"... really? I would imagine it's far more likely that the teacher is completely consumed with what goes on in her classroom and sometimes forgets the add-ons.

Year 3 - he should be able to tell the time and get himself to a lesson at that age.

We met that attitude when ds started at prep and while it seems like a harsh lesson especially if like our ds he has issues around self organisation, but have to say it has paid off longer term and he is far better organised and methodical than dd. It really isn't down to the class teacher to do the reminding and he has to learn to take responsibility for reminding her at the start of the lesson and just taking himself off. Interestingly our ds aso plays a brass instrument, happy buzzing and tooting!

Presumably he got his detention as much for his attitude as not doing as asked. Another thing you need to be aware of is that teachers take in and react to sn differently so do flag it up specifically, frustrating though it may be. He may well increasingly be taught by a variety of staff who may not be kept in the loop.

Very late but AbigailS

Good point LIZS. I don't think it has helped that I've been away for two weeks out of the first three weeks of term either. No idea about the detention as I wasn't able to ask (didn't think asking a week later was worth it). Doubt it was attitude but don't think it is worth making a big deal of unless it happens again. Ds copes really really well so I doubt would appreciate me highlighting his differences. That will happen soon enough next year when he won't be able to play contact rugby.

Hopefully it will improve. I said to ds's teacher on Friday that things could only improve and she said not necessarily. Seems to be a glass half empty type of personality which is hard to deal with at any age least of all when you are 7.

I know our boys go to the same school Mollieo, and my son has gone through year 3. Has this part of the school changed since the change of head and the appointment of another deputy head. I would be really interested to know who the form teacher is, but of course I realise you can't say. Why no contact rugby? my son has HFA and dyspraxia and the sports teachers especially Mr G really encouraged it, he doesn't do it now, he's moved up several years and now goes to CC.

His joints are too loose for contact rugby according to his consultant. He will need to be re-assessed before the start of yr 4 to check whether things have improved over the last couple of years.

Teacher I think has been there for years although I'd never seen her before the first day of term. She is Scottish which probably narrows it down a bit. Seems to have a very abrupt and disinterested manner. It is a shame that I missed the curriculum meeting as I think that is a good way to get the measure of the teacher. I'll just have to wait for parents' evening next month to get a better idea of what she's like.