to think you should find out how much maternity pay is before getting pregnant?

[signothetimes]

I have a colleague at work who got married last december and who decided in July to try for a baby. I assumed she'd sussed all the ins and outs of maternity leave/childcare/cost of babies etc. before she stopped using contraception. It took her all of 4 weeks to fall pregnant. Today, she was almost in tears on realising that you get only £128 maternity pay per week once the employer's pay stops. While trying to be sympathetic etc. all I could hear in my little brain was 'what the feck did you think you got?'. Now her 'hubby' is chucking his toys out the pram at the idea of losing his bumper Sky package for 3 fecking months.

Call me 'old fashioned' but I thought the idea of planning for a baby involved, you know, actually planning how you manage with maternity leave etc.

just not got the patience for this kinda stuff

Maybe she could save some money while she's still working? I had to do that and it was fine.

But yes, as the baby is planned, really they ought to have checked out maternity pay!

I didn't look at either details of my maternity pay or childcare costs tbh.

I wanted to have a baby more than I was worried about what we might have to cut back on so just went for it. I think if I had known that childcare for my PFB was going to cost me £1800 a month I'd probably still be childless rather than a mother of 4

Tee2072 Oh you do get family medical leave,its up to 12 weeks a year I think.BUT its not paid,they cant deny you that leave but dont have to pay you for it and i know no one personally who has ever gotten paid for it.

They dont actually fire you for being pregnant but when you go out to have the baby a lot of places will not hold your job,if your not back in as little as 2 weeks, in some cases, they hire some one else,that happened to a friend of mine,not that very long ago, and she had to go back to work after 2 weeks

My job at the moment lets you take your sick time and accrued vacation time and thats it

A wee update

Colleague has calmed down a little, realising that she does have the option of a payment break in her mortgage. She'll not be paying over £200 a month travel costs too, so she won't be as destitute as she first feared. Hubby has reassured her that they'll manage, he will work weekends (to avoid getting rid of the SKY package) as well as his full time job to make sure she can stay off as long as she wants to. She is planning on returning after 3/4 mths anyway, as she doesn't want to get out of the swing of things at work. Her 'tears' were over a period of 6 weeks between getting the last of her wages, and going back to work.

She thinks she's found a nursery she can use one day a week - judged solely on the calibre of cars driven by the parents using said nursery. Not phoned them, look at it, spoken to a soul. She thinks it's important for her baby to be socialised at the nursery 'cos her 18mth nephew (who doesn't go to nursery) hit another child at his 1st experience of a party, as the child nicked his toy.

My judge-y pants have been chaffing all day 'Tis midly amusing listening to her, knowing the comedy-stylee frying-pan-to-the-face shock that will hit her when this PFB arrives and wreaks havoc with her plans. Much the same as it did me - the realisation that, no, no one else actually wants to deal with a screaming baby to give you a break - that was my job and I wasn't getting away from it

I'm sure she'll be a great mum, once she settles into the reality of parent-hood. She's just as unrealistic as pretty much all of us were, pre-first born. But amusing all the same

I didn't check.

I couldn't care less lol. I have a family who stubble so much to have children so it's all I have known. I got to 26 years old and said Sod it! I was pregnant in like 2 weeks

Was expecting a good few years of hard slog to be honest.

Stubble?!
Struggle!!!
Damn you autocorrect

God, I checked almost obsessively about pay and how we would manage. I had 9 months off with DS - bliss.

I had 9 weeks off with DD despite having been promoted in that time and SMP had gone up. Shit happens.

Yanbu, I don't understand the lack of planning and then being shocked you can't afford it either. I only got Smp which was about 10% of my normal salary so i had to save up to cover some of my salary drop both times before I got pregnant.

Glad they have now managed to work out how to make ends meet :)

My friend got £700+ a week MP! She was in sales and worked her butt off though.

I am always astonished at how many people don't seem to plan for anything.

Obviously, I know I can't control all the variables, but I like to have a plan, a flexible plan for sure, but a good solid idea about where we are going to be and what we are going to be doing for at least a couple of years.

I'm exactly the same Morloth

Agree , if it is even possibly going to be an issue then you look into it in advance. I'm sure they'll manage , somehow, just like we have all had to do. lol @ nursery judged by the cars outside! Enjoy the pfb-isms!