We have dd1 who is 3 and my in laws adore her. They are socially awkward but I'm used to it. 4 weeks ago I gave birth to ID twin girls. We spent 8 days in hospital as they were premature. We had 2 nights at home then the in laws (mil, fil and bil) all came for the weekend (Friday to Sunday). I had said I couldn't cope with bil as well as the house isn't big enough. mil and fil were in the nursery as twins are in our room at the moment, but it meant bil would have to be in the living room and he got stroppy last time we did this as dd1 would wake him at 7am. He came despite dh and I requesting he came another time.
He is a primary teacher and had been back at work for a week but was apparently "exhausted" so went up and napped in mil and fil bed from 9am-12pm after they'd got up on the Saturday, then fil napped 2-4pm as he was tired. On the Sunday, when dd1 went downstairs at 7.30am, bil actually went and got into dd1's bed. I was not happy and felt that visiting the couple who'd just had twins in special care (breathing and feeding probs), plus a cs, and not much sleep (as is obv the norm with newborns), taking naps was really taking the mickey.
I'd requested that if they came so soon, could mil cook something for us for dinner on the Saturday night - they got fish and chips in. tbh this wasn't ideal as constipation after a cs is terrible so really wanted some home cooked food and dh and I can get take out on bad days.
With the cs, standing was still a little painful and dh was happy to do all nappy changes before I bf them, especially as I'd done all of them while in hospital. It wasn't an issue and was just what we do when dh is home - mil said "Princess have you actually changed a nappy yet?!" I laughed and politely pointed out that I had done far more than her darling son, but luckily dh is a wonderful husband.
tbh, they played with dd1 but showed little interest in dtds. It felt like an obligitory visit to do their duty.
Finally, on Sunday morning I walked into the living room and in laws were sprawled over the sofas so there was nowhere for me to sit. Having had a cs I was recovering well but still needed to take things easy. I was so cross I went and did the washing up. It's such a contrast to my parents who have done housework, cared for dd1 and cooked us meals. I wasn't expecting as much as my parents do but making cups of tea and washing up their mess would have been good. Mil did make bil toast when he asked - didn't offer me any!
I want to get over it but I'm still so cross. dh is too but won't talk to them about it and has spoken to them since ignoring the issue. They made a comment by text that they probably visited too soon as we were a bit stressed. Yes, by the time they left we were!