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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To still snoop on DH's ex GF's fb page?!

31 replies

Argos · 23/09/2011 19:48

Ok I know I'm being damned unreasonable but why the hell do I do it?! Can't help myself and then feel really grubby and upset afterwards...

OP posts:
worraliberty · 23/09/2011 19:49

Are you insecure in your marriage?

Kayano · 23/09/2011 19:49

Pretty lame

Hassled · 23/09/2011 19:49

What will FB tell you that your DH can't? What's your motive?

LoveInAColdClimate · 23/09/2011 19:49

Why on earth would you? How long have you been married?

TheEarlOfDoncaster1963 · 23/09/2011 19:50

no, not BU - but probably healthier not to.

KatieMiddleton · 23/09/2011 19:51

Yabu and a bit tragic.

Just stop doing it.

OpenMouthInsertFoot · 23/09/2011 19:51

What is going through your mind when you go to look? Understanding why you behave as you do is the first step to changing the behaviour.

slavetofilofax · 23/09/2011 19:52

Tragic is a good word for it.

If you have confidence and security in your relationship, you wouldn't need to do this. Maybe you should concentrate your effort elsewhere.

TidyDancer · 23/09/2011 19:52

I honestly don't understand why you'd do this.

So yes, YABU. Obviously.

Original poster
Argos · 23/09/2011 19:52

No, I am just intrigued for some reason. They were together for years, then best friends for a few more and she wasn't when we got together. I've only met her once, I am just so curious/nosey

OP posts:
Original poster
Argos · 23/09/2011 19:53

Wasn't happy when we got together

OP posts:
Bunbaker · 23/09/2011 19:55

Facebook has a lot to answer for. Just don't look. You are asking for trouble.

LoveInAColdClimate · 23/09/2011 19:57

He married you, not her. Find a distraction technique for when you want to look - I have no idea what you like doing, but pick something incompatible with Facebook stalking, like a few rows of knitting/a ten minute walk/a quick bit of yoga/a chapter of a good book.

Original poster
Argos · 23/09/2011 20:00

Is there no one else out there who wouldn't be a bit curious? It's not to see what she's doing, more I wanted to see what she looks like and I guess compare myself to her . Have met her once briefly.

OP posts:
LoveInAColdClimate · 23/09/2011 20:02

Maybe when we first got together, but certainly not after marriage - I just don't care who he used to go out with, he would have married them if he'd wanted to but he didn't, he married me!

Pedallleur · 23/09/2011 20:04

Are you short of something to do or are you 'hoping' your husband is going to be on there? Do you think she is following you on FB or Twitter? Stay off the site beause no good will come of you stalking her

Bunbaker · 23/09/2011 20:04

"Is there no one else out there who wouldn't be a bit curious?"

Nope. Not at all. Mind you, we have been married for 30 years and I doubt if they would be on Facebook anyway..

Original poster
Argos · 23/09/2011 20:04

No I don't look that much anymore tbh but still I wish I didn't have the urge at all

OP posts:
LeBOF · 23/09/2011 20:05

Just block her so you can't see her. It is a bit teenage.

Original poster
Argos · 23/09/2011 20:05

Oh right, we're 28 and have been married 2 years Blush

OP posts:
PetiteRaleuse · 23/09/2011 20:11

A bit of snooping on FB can be fun. But not to the point where you are worrying about IBU. You're obviously doing too much of it.

Have a break from the FB malarkey.

StrandedBear · 23/09/2011 20:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pelvicflooragogo · 23/09/2011 20:33

I do this! Just totally nosiness - including trying to see their Amazon wishlists! Have you realised you can put any name in and see their wishlist? And how about linkedin? But then they can find out you've seen them...I do it for me exes too. Love it! I do tell DH about it freely - he thinks it's hilarious. don't do it loads - just occasionally. And can't see proper FB - just the piccies which haven't been security protected Shock!

MerylStrop · 23/09/2011 20:34

Does it make you happy?

No?

Then just stop

AgentZigzag · 23/09/2011 20:36

I would definately probably have a bit of a shufty too Grin

But in an interested because I'd have heard so much about her way, rather than looking on her as some kind of competition.