to tell my friend to FUCK OFF as i am not a fucking free taxi service!!

[MistyMountainHop]

me and my friend (A) have been going to a dance class on tuesday evenings and i pick her up, i don't mind this at all as she offers to give me a couple of quid petrol money and is really grateful that i pick her up as she doesn't have a car and is on her own so no dh / dp to take her etc. i usually refuse the money as she is a good mate and i know how much she appreciates it.

another friend (B) has asked if she can tag along with us. she doesnt drive but her dh has a car. (so i don't know why he can't take her and pick her up, they havent even got dc so wouldnt be a problem. i know my dh would do it for me.) also she lives out of the way whereas my other friend is pretty much en route to the class.

anyway it just pisses me off as B just EXPECTS me to ferry her around, she didn't even ask me to pick her up, she just assumes i will in case anyone thinks i'm over reacting she has done this loads before, not just on this occasion. and she NEVER EVER offers petrol money. she is a fucking tight arse, she is the type that will calculate her share of the bill to the last penny if we eat out, that kind of person.

god it pisses me off and fuel is so fucking expensive. its like people like this think its free to drive all round town ffs.

Tell her you dont go past her house so she will have to make her own way.

Say that you and your DH are on a massive economy drive and will have to say no this time, really sorry.....unless she wants to do a lift share?

YANBU what did she actually say to assume you were picking her up? Why don't you just assume she is making her own way there or just say no?

I wonder why you are friends with her too! But if she hasn't asked you to pick her up, how can you be so sure she expects it? Just say, Sure, it's a public class, anyone can go along- we'll see you there next Tuesday! Then if she asks you directly, just say it's not convenient.

(Don't even mention fuel costs, because I bet you a pound to a pinch of shit she would then offer you petrol money which would mysteriously never materialise.)

If she hasn't asked you to pick her up, what's the problem?

Just say "No, sorry, you're a bit out of the way."

well... if she hasn't asked you then just don't pick her up.

when she asks you why you didn't come jhust say "oh sorry, i didn't realise you needed a lift"

If she was your friend you would do it surely .but it doesn't sound like you really think of her as a friend

I do my mates favours all the time

(sort of as Posie says) you could 'assume' she (or her dh) is offering to do the journey every other week and picking up your friend A too?

Does she drive herself, or just her dh? If she drives, either tell her it's her turn next week, or if you're really skint just say you need £2 petrol money or whatever to be able to add her on to the lift arrangement as it's out of your way. If it were me though, I'd just get on with it and give her a lift and get her to buy me a drink or something next time we're out.

sorry, my OP should have been clearer, when she asked if she could come, she said, and what time would you pick me up? hence, her assuming

and i probably wouldn't accept the money if she offered, its the PRINCIPLE that she doesn't offer, its piss taking IMO.

It is normal to do friends favours and TBH I wouldn't think twice about doing this for a friend. Petrol money wouldn't cross my mind, I agree that is tight.

How far out of your way is she?

" when she asked if she could come, she said, and what time would you pick me up? "

at which point you reply "pick you up? oh i'm sorry I can't"

ftr i wouldn't mind picking a friend up either. it's just what you do

but i WOULD be annoyed by someone just assuming i was picking them up, rather than asking me if I could. which I presume is the OP's issue here too

Why on Earth didn't you just say, 'Sorry, it's a bit out of my way' if you didn't want to do it?

Just say no you don't go her way. One you do it for her it's hard to get out if it, just say no from the outset

I think I would say, get yourself over to my house and we'll leave at x time.

I assume it's an evening class?
If so tell her time is tight getting out the house and you haven't got time to do it but if she needs a lift back it isout of the way so sorry but can't afford it!

I have same, friend from badminton and live just round the corner and share lifts but another lady always wants a lift too, she has never offered petrol and is always late too

Just say no. She has asked a question which she is entitled to do ( although its a bit cheeky) and you are entitled to say "No sorry it's out of my way and we are cutting back so can't afford the petrol/am always running tight to get to the class on time what with the DCs/I'm always knackered afterwards so I don't fancy the extra drive afterwards.

What Lesley said - she makes her way to yours / your other mates, not a bother. Same for return journey.

I would never talk about my friends the way the OP has in her thread title

I know that you do mates favours, but not ones who constantly take the piss

She will aways expect you to ferry her around for free if you keep letting her........if you are not prepared to say anything to her then you need to accept it.