To not have a sit down wedding buffett as we are finally getting married and having it at 4pm ?

[misscracker]

I was thinking of having a afternoon tea,sandwiches,pasties,pies,cakes,etc and beer for the men,wine,bubbly oj and tea and coffee for everyone still, but doing it without the formality aibu?.

As a friend said it was?.

Just my preference, but I appreciate a sit-down meal after travelling a long distance. You get to sit down and you don't have to try to balance your food/drinks or "mingle" while eating. You can do things to make it less formal if you wish (e.g. mix people up between courses).

I do like sandwiches, pasties, pies, cakes etc. but they're all very carb-heavy so I'd add a few other things like salads, maybe some cheese, smoked salmon etc.

Hope it goes well whatever you decide on :)

We had buffet and long tables in the village hall. No seating plan except for the top table. Lots of the usual cold buffet sort of things and a choice of two proper puddings. I can't remember what they were, but I do remember eating some of both and wondering if the bride was meant to be so greedy.
In fact we had no idea exactly what would turn up because our rather casual caterer sent her only set of literature to my mum and the post office lost it. She panicked a bit and we assured her that MIL had it all in hand and it would be ok and it was
Oh the joys of getting married in DH's home church when it is in Cornwall, your parents are in Wales and the bride and groom are at different universities 100 miles apart and nowhere near either set of parents.
However, everyone seemed happy and 20+ years later people still say nice things about our wedding. I guess we were very lucky because we were the first of our lot to get married and being broke students we could get away with a very relaxed informal day.

'Can't be doing with all this 3/4 course meal crap! I just want people to see us exchange vows then get pissed and have fun.'

i think that's rude actually. we had a sit down 4 course meal - it's fairly standard in ireland. money was extremely tight and we threw almost every penny at the reception to ensure people had plenty of wine (actually, unlimited wine at the meal) as well as a choice of starter and main course. we spent ages on the table plan to ensure that nobody was seated at a table where they didn't know anyone - in fact it worked out that everyone knew at least four people at their table and were also seated with at least four people they didn't know, this worked really well.

our entire wedding was far from 'formal'. we didn't have bridesmaids, best man, we walked up the aisle together, no wedding cars, no master of ceremonies, no top table, no wedding speeches. we had a fabulous, relaxed day and people still tell me how great it was.

it would be incredibly boring if everyone had the same type of wedding. i have been to loads of weddings, lots of different styles and pretty much all of them were enjoyable.

what the OP suggests sounds lovely - but that doesn't mean that people who opt for a sit down meal have chosen a 'crap' option.

I don't think it's rude. It's my opinion. I don't like the idea of having a sit down meal. It's too fussy and it's too much effort and it's too damn expensive!

I like the idea of Not having a seating plan. Why spend all that time making sure people are sat at tables with people they know when they could just choose their own seats.

We're not having a head table or bridesmaids or maid of honours or best man or separate guests for ceremony/evening reception or anything. Like I said, I just want a simple exchange of vows then for people to eat, drink and be merry.

That's my opinion! I'm sure your wedding was lovely but I can't stand all the formality of sit down meals.

Thanks for all your input Im glad I have stuck with this plan after all ,we are still feeding people and paying for their drinks,only those in the day though.

Most of all they will see us finally marry and thats only close friends and then eat,drink and party.