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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think a 10 year age gap isn't shocking?

51 replies

fegwood · 15/09/2011 11:02

People are constantly shocked that DP is 10 years older than me and I don't get it. We met at 22/32 so were both adults when we got together and the age thing has never been an issue, except very slightly to do with money - when we met he'd had 10 years of work experience/promotions/payrises and I'd recently graduated with a shedload of debt and started my first ever 'proper' job.

Lately, MIL has been griping that I won't "give her grandchildren" before her son is 40 and puts it down to the fact that I'm too young for him/not serious about our relationship. We're now 27/37, getting married next year, trying to sell a house DP has bought and developed, both super busy at work and not in the least worried about what our ages will be when we have kids. She does my nut.

OP posts:
ComradeJing · 15/09/2011 11:48

There's 15 years between DH & I. Were happy and it works. :)

Yanbu

Dlaney · 15/09/2011 11:49

What's 10 years these days, really?

AMumInScotland · 15/09/2011 11:51

10 years is nothing.
Your MIL is barking.

Its none of her business.

ruddynorah · 15/09/2011 12:05

15 yrs gap here. I must say I'm noticing it more as we get older.

Original poster
fegwood · 15/09/2011 12:13

Thanks everyone!

We've lived together since 3 months into our relationship and I know from about 2 weeks in that I had met the man for me so none of her concerns about 'seriousness' have any grounding.

I think Grimma (and others) may have hit the nail on the head that she wants to be young enough to enjoy 'doing stuff' with her grandkids.

DP just laughs it off and puts it down to her being nuts in a charming sort of way. He's a bit deluded about her really.

OP posts:
robino · 15/09/2011 12:18

Does the fact that we provided a mumsnet wedding absolve us of age gap disgrace?

maddy68 · 15/09/2011 12:20

Im 17 yrs older than my partner
he doesnt care a jot and I have got a lovely toy boy!:)

sjuperwolef · 15/09/2011 12:28

dp is 8 yrs older than me and i adore the bones he's made of Grin

LittleOneMum · 15/09/2011 12:32

Right, I'm JEALOUS now. DH is only 6 years older than me. Am off down to the local bowling green to scout out some real men. Wink

LooLoo7 · 15/09/2011 12:34

Haha LittleOne, i'm starting to feel the same! Wink

EauRouge · 15/09/2011 12:37

12 years between DH and I and we have 2 DDs. DH was 39 and 41 when they were born. The only time we ever notice the age gap is when he says things like 'do you remember that Huey Lewis and the News record?' and I have to reply 'no, because I was 3' Grin

mumofbumblebea · 15/09/2011 12:45

robino only if it was before you reproduced! not that i'm currently 15 weeks preggers with my second child and me and partner are unmarried...Blush

mumofbumblebea · 15/09/2011 12:47

sjuperwolef what about when they start rattling Wink
i personally think maddy68 is the wisest of all!

sjuperwolef · 15/09/2011 13:10

even then i probably will Grin

robino · 15/09/2011 13:18

mum of errr, it was before I gave birth to number 3. And I was only a bit pregnant at the time. Totally absolved of perceived impropriety unless you count the fact that still no-one apart from about 500 mumsnetters knows that we're married...

LDNmummy · 15/09/2011 13:21

10 years is nothing. I was born when my dad was in his mid 50's and I wasn't his last child.

She is BU and pushing you to give her grandkids because she probably has nothing else to focus on.

RogerMelly · 15/09/2011 13:21

no 10 yrs is nothing. We have an 8 yr gap and mil never even mentioned grandchildren, mind you I had given her 3 before I was 30 Blush but 40 for a man to become a father is nothing these days is it? Infact i would imagine it's typically quite normal now for a man to be over 40

mumofbumblebea · 15/09/2011 13:29

robino dating a 26 year old when you're 16 and then waiting till your expecting your third child before getting married! And then marrying in secret! You are what's wrong with todays society! as am iGrin

Crosshair · 15/09/2011 13:33

yanbu

11 years between me and dp. She sounds worried about missing out on grandchildren, not that she should be saying this to you, how rude!

startail · 15/09/2011 13:36

DHs dad was 56 when he was born, 17 years older than his mum and DH has a younger sisterGrin

borderslass · 15/09/2011 13:36

Theres a 13 year age gap between me and DH he's 54 and I'm 40 been together over 22 years now and have 2 DD's [20, 15]and a DS.[17]

DorisIsAPinkDragon · 15/09/2011 13:40

9 years difference here DH was 39 when we had DD1. She need to know a little less then she will have less to put on her calendar!

Icelollycraving · 15/09/2011 14:59

10 years is fine! That's the gap for us.
I'd be very tempted to wind up mil though by saying you will be working on your career until your early 40s,hope she's around still.

Mamma101 · 17/09/2011 02:20

whoops - hope not! we're 20 yrs apart. As long as you got love....
xxx

bakeyouhappy · 17/09/2011 06:18

Another with 20 yrs difference. I was 18 when I met him. 3dcs later...

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