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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Facebook Breast Awareness 'game'

50 replies

eaglewings · 14/09/2011 07:53

Have posted this in pregnancy loss and many of the replies urged me to post this here
It's about the game that gets women to post as their status
'I'm 16 weeks and craving jelly tots, or similar depending on their birth month and day'
AIBU to ask you to think twice before playing this?
Those who have just had a miscarriage, recurrent miscarriage or are struggling with infertility are finding these posts hard to see.
My dh is finding this hard too as we are coping with our 4th miscarriage in a year, so it's not just women
So am I being a PWBM ( Precious Wana Be Mum ) or is this a joke gone too far, in fact is it even from BreastvAwareness or is it just made up by a person wanting a laugh?

OP posts:

Birdsgottafly · 14/09/2011 08:02

Can you not use the hide button on these?

As tough as it is you cannot block anything pregnancy related out of your life. When you miscarry (i have had several) you suddenly see pregnant women everywhere.

I have teenage DD's and i know that these games do start conversations and raise awareness.

Tbh if you are feeling that fragile you would be better staying off facebook because alll those 'post this is you are a good mum' crappy poem posts (which i think are stupid) are going to upset you more.

Original poster

eaglewings · 14/09/2011 08:12

I was told about 2 pregnancies when I was out last night, I was happy about both of them and asked questions and congratulated them.
I am OK to see pregnant women
Should all women failing to conceive a healthy pregnant turn off Facebook
Think the feelyourbobbies.com campaign would be more appropriate

OP posts:

muffinflop · 14/09/2011 08:12

As someone who's also had recurrent miscarriages I agree but I know it's my issues. I have had to stop myself from ranting on these statuses over the last couple of weeks. I don't understand how it's raising awareness either. 'oh look x says she's pregnant and craving sweets' doesn't make me think I need to check my breasts. And the whole 'don't tell the men' is a load of crap too.

I'm not sure why pretending to be pregnant is funny but, like I said, I think maybe my 'issues' cloud the humour of it all

slavetofilofax · 14/09/2011 08:12

I agree with you completely, and I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriges.

I do think it's really insensitive, and completely pointless. If people want to help raise awareness of breast cancer, which frankly, is the cancer that probably already has the most awareness, then they should donate money or actively do something practical to help.

I have not been upset by this one because thankfully for me I have had heathy babies, but I have seen them about hidden illnesses, diabetes, and autism, to name a few, and I have been in the position of being upset by one of them.

It is very insensitive to randomly post these things when so many people have facebook contacts whose personal lives they know little about. You just never know what anyone else is struggling with at any one time, and people should think a little further than their own computer screen before they post things that are going to remind people how crappy things are for them.

It's all very well to say 'hide it', but sometimes the people posting this tripe often post other nice things, and it's not like they are being malicious, just thoughtless. And by the time you get to hiding it, your heart has already sunk from seeing it in the first place!

5inthebed · 14/09/2011 08:14

YANBU, I don't think it raises awareness at all.

So sorry for your miscarriages.

QueenOfFeckingEverything · 14/09/2011 08:16

I hate those status things, in fact I hate any status that is not the original words/thoughts of the poster. And I hate quite a lot of the ones that are [grouch]

So on that basis YANBU.

Like its going to raise awareness of anything anyway, FFS.

BatsUpMeNightie · 14/09/2011 08:16

I find these things tiresome beyond belief and IMO they do little to raise 'awareness' of what is already a high awareness issue (and rightly so) and as for the 'don't tell the men' bit - WTAF?? Tell everyone! Don't leave men out ffs - apart from anything else they too can suffer.

PicaK · 14/09/2011 08:17

It's a ridiculously stupid game. The one with the handbags was funny.

Thankfully no-one I know is playing it.

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 14/09/2011 08:19

I don't get these stupid games and tend to not participate coz well, it seems pointless imo. However, I don't think anyone should be expected to not post something on their wall just incase it upsets someone else. If you don't like it, hide it. Pregnancy related stuff is clearly a sore point for you OP whthere it's real or not.

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 14/09/2011 08:21

Also why can't "we tell the men"? Breast cancer affects men too. It's quite rare (I think) for men to get it, but there are plenty of men who have lost wives and partners to breast cancer. Not to mention mothers, sisters and daughters.

kat2504 · 14/09/2011 08:27

It's childish and silly. If you want to raise awareness about breast cancer, then put out some actual information about breast cancer. Pretending to be pregnant (and not telling the men, tee hee hee) does not improve anyone's knowledge of cancer. Nor does it raise money for cancer charities. The bra and handbag versions didn't either but they were marginally less stupid.

If you want to help cancer charities try donating or raising some actual money for them or volunteering some of your time, not posting bollocks on facebook.

HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 14/09/2011 08:32

This blog sums up how I feel about it too ... blog

HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 14/09/2011 08:34

Also, a friend of mine posted this as her status in response to being asked to play these gams .... "isn`t going to fake a pregnancy, post my bra color, my shoe size, or where I keep my purse, in a vague and ineffective attempt to raise breast cancer awareness. What I WILL do is say that women who breastfeed greatly reduce the risk of breast cancer for themselves AND their child, and if anyone needs some support, help, and love in that area, you can always talk to me. Now THAT is what I call a helpful status about boobs!"

QueenOfFeckingEverything · 14/09/2011 08:42

Ooh I like that one, Glaikit

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 14/09/2011 08:47

I posted on a similar thread last week, I haven't changed my mind. I think it's really attention-seeking and childish. Breast cancer isn't gender specific and I think this 'game' is just a coy attempt at making readers think the poster is pregnant. So silly and cringeworthy.

If you want to raise awareness, why not just do that, clearly and instructively?

RebelFromTheWaistDown · 14/09/2011 09:00

HowToLookGoodGlaikit - I have nicked your mate's status for myself I hope you don't mind

farfallarocks · 14/09/2011 09:02

YANBU I can't believe this is actively promoted by a breast cancer charity given that treatment for cancer can leave you infertile?

Vile and insensitive

going · 14/09/2011 09:02

I think it's awful and really insensitive. The bra one was great as it was something all (or nearly all) women could relate to. There are too many emotional issues surrounding pregnancy making the game very insensitive. Thankfully I have only seen it on two friends statuses.

HippyHippopotamus · 14/09/2011 09:07

howtolookgoodglaikit I've pinched it too! Its going to go viral at this rate

etyksm · 14/09/2011 09:09

YANBU

Had 2 friends status's confuse me before I got the e-mail.

I don't think pretend pregnancy is something to joke over, every Pregnancy is precious.

Yes I joined in the handbag one, as this was harmless fun, but the latest is a too sensitive for my liking.

QueenOfFeckingEverything · 14/09/2011 09:11

nah it won't be officially endorsed/promoted by any charities, i bet my arse

its just shite

GoldenGreen · 14/09/2011 09:13

I don't like these games anyway, but what pisses me off about this one is it makes no bloody sense.

You never say "I'm x weeks" about anything except in relation to pregnancy. Therefore not funny. Therefore YANBU.

Sorry to hear of your mcs, OP

kat2504 · 14/09/2011 09:25

www.facebook.com/pages/Im-X-weeks-and-craving-something-sweet/196415773757694?sk=wall

They can't even see sense when people go on their wall and point out the errors of their ways to them. Clearly not a proper cancer charity, just a self appointed bunch of morons.

kat2504 · 14/09/2011 09:26

They haven't even acknowledged the woman in the photos section who had to lose her twin babies to have cancer treatment that saved her life but left her infertile.

msnovember · 14/09/2011 09:36

I hate hate hate these. Worst of all is people genuinely seem to think they're raising awareness

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