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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a school can't legally suddenly ban the headscarf for muslin girls!

678 replies

Headscarfs123 · 13/09/2011 00:15

So our local catholic school has banned the headscarf this week...disastrous for some of the girls but also against church advice that headscarfs are fine, against DFES advice about consultation and sensitivity to religious groups, against best practice as this type of change should involve the governing body? discriminatory on religious and sexist grounds...Sikh boys can keep their turbans.

Aibu to think that the school is legally in the wrong?

OP posts:
Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 21:53

Why would you not tell young children what different beliefs people have in the world?

Are you saying you tell them one thing and one thing alone?

ravenAK · 14/09/2011 22:02

No - I tell them I don't believe in god.

Dh is Buddhist, nanny is Muslim, step-grandma is born again - they get no shortage of different beliefs to evaluate in their own time.

They get a certain amount of the rather more prescriptive 'broadly Xtian' shtick at school. They'd get a good deal more at a faith school, because faith schools a) select for parents who pay at least lip & bum/pew service to their ethos, & b) that's the point of a school being a faith school.

It's not an environment that is representative of the wider community, & for that reason I think they're unhealthy.

But I'm happy for other parents to disagree with me on that - so long as they don't ask me to pay for a service I can't use.

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 22:03

but surely faith schools are telling them one thing alone and not leaving it open for thought or discussion. I'm mixed about this but starting to come round to the fact it might be better if all schools were secular but taught about and gave time for other other religions. I admit I was surprised that when i came back to england that what i thought were secular schools, actually did teach and show a bias towards a certain religion. Still not sure if there isn't a place for faith schools but can understand how it must be annoying to have a state funded school right next to your house which you are not entitled to.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:05

But technically they are also paying for your school too. I dont see the problem. Your not directly paying them. Its all a big pot that reilgious and the faithless pay into.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:07

"but surely faith schools are telling them one thing alone and not leaving it open for thought or discussion."

This is a huge myth. Not at all. They teach about all religions.

ThePosieParker · 14/09/2011 22:09

FFS Coco. We talk about what we believe as truth at home, who doesn't? However I do share other ideas with my dcs. We do talk about the afterlife and I vaguely talk about heaven, I think they're far too young to think death is final. We suggest that people may have souls, or may not. Lots of ideas are shared in this house. We also talk about religion as control of individuals and that it may limit one's freedoms and conversely that without religion some people do not feel free. But it is all framed as 'some believe'. I try not to press upon them, too much, what I believe because it is rather bleak for such small minds and a world with no heaven would be too much of a burden, death is bad enough, but death as final is pretty dark.

ravenAK · 14/09/2011 22:09

For example, let's say I live 3 miles from Cocoflowers, & there are two schools serving our community.

I live next door to CocoFaith High. She lives next door to Whatever Comp.

I apply to CFH, because I've heard they get great results - but even though I live 3 miles nearer, she gets preference because the admission criteria give places to dc whose parents are of her faith.

OK - I'll apply to Whatever Comp then. But Cocoflowers still has preference, because WEC gives first dibs according to distance.

It's not a fair or equitable system - it's archaic.

ThePosieParker · 14/09/2011 22:10

Coco. Not a huge myth, as far as my dcs school is concerned there is a God, no question, my dc even had to write in his friend book that Jesus was one of his friends.... they also pray three times a day.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:11

You know what. If you need to be as rude as to start your answers with FFS you are not someone I need to converse with.

ravenAK · 14/09/2011 22:11

So no, it may be one pot - but you've got a bigger spoon & you're allowed to push in the queue.

ThePosieParker · 14/09/2011 22:13

It's just language and expression, it means that you are saying outlandish things and it's rather incredible to both be an adult and have your ideas, in addition to repeatedly missing the point, that's all Smile.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:16

The myth is they only educate people on one religion Posie.

Apparently Im missing the point. What a joke. A sad, sad joke.

My ideas are far better than yours.

onagar · 14/09/2011 22:17

RavenAK explains it perfectly. Surely anyone would agree that was an unfair system?

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 22:38

Raven's point did make me think. I grew up in the west of Scotland in the catholic religion. I learnt that we were lucky to have education as we had to fund it ourselves way back as we were discriminated against. Maybe due to this feeling of discrimination I've always felt there was a place for faith schools - but this kind of discussion really helps to open your eyes to all sorts of opinions and ideas and to challenge your expectations and norms from your upbringing etc. Coco - you really aren't doing your cause any favours.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:44

"Coco - you really aren't doing your cause any favours"

Ah yes; sorry to let truth and a bit of sense get in the way of your faith-bashing

As you were.

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 22:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 22:59

Right. And by picking on a certain poster for no reason at all other than to be as nasty as possible is the way help my cause then? You seem to think this is a lovely thing to do.

ravenAK · 14/09/2011 23:04

How does 'disagreeing with an argument raised on a forum' = 'picking on a particular poster'?

& where's the nastiness?

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 23:07

coco - where was i nasty as possible?

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 23:08

For a random poster to suddenly join and post "Coco - you really aren't doing your cause any favours" for NO reason what so ever just stuck on the end is quite nasty, no?

And beign sworn at (FFS) with vile comments such as "it's rather incredible to both be an adult and have your ideas" is not what nice people write.

Would you like people to come on here and post the same to you Raven?

Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 23:09

And "blinkered" mind- what are you trying to imply with that?

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 23:12

I'm not random and have posted on this topic earlier and have been watching it. And you really are doing faith schools no good. I am not against or for faith schools - not made up my mind yet but people like you would certainly make me think twice against them.

MistyValley · 14/09/2011 23:13

It's not a hard concept to understand is it though.

  • There is only so much money to spend on schools. Barely enough, really.
  • State funded 'faith' schools legally discriminate against the 'unfaithful'.
  • It's unfair, because there's no such thing as an 'unfaithful' school for 'unfaithfuls' which discriminates against 'faithfuls'.
Cocoflower · 14/09/2011 23:13

Clap clap another horrible post.

People like you make me glad Im not an atheist

begonyabampot · 14/09/2011 23:14

Coco, raven really made sense as to how unfair it can be. Luckily, you being of faith have more choices that those who don't. Very fair!