Spent some time with a good friend of mine, we have toddler DC close in age to each other.
My friend is not only stricter than I am, but also sort of constantly teaching her DD things or 'quizzing' her (e.g. 'Oh look, there's a dog, D-O-G, what sound does a dog make?')
Her DD does seem very clever, and can be very sweet, but she also seems rather, well, unhappy most of the time (grumpy, whingy, clingy). I think partly it's that she's tired (she doesn't get to nap when she wants), and perhaps also because of some other preferences my friend has (for example, she doesn't want her DD to get too attached to things and pick up bad habits, so she was never allowed a dummy and isn't allowed now to carry around her favourite plush toy too often).
I would appreciate some advice because I find myself caught between wanting to be more like my friend (I'm a bit of a slacker) but not wanting my boy to be smart or well-behaved at the expense of being happy. So far he is a very sweet and easygoing boy, obviously sometimes he will have to be unhappy (e.g. if he is misbehaving and has to be punished) but I would hate that to become his default demeanor.
AIBU to think happy kids are more likely to be well-behaved anyway?
AIBU to think the advantages of being intelligent can be wiped out by being unhappy?
I thought I knew what I was doing but now I'm not so sure...