Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

hot drinks shouldn't be held when holding young children

130 replies

Madamolive · 10/09/2011 20:05

AIBU into thinking that you just shouldn't hold a hot drink whilst holding a baby incase god forbid something terrible happens :(

Family member was over visiting, had usual hot tea whilst cuddling my second DC- 5 weeks.My toddler was running about playing and knocked into family member. Cup nearly went everywhere. Thankfully didn't.
Said family member carried on drinking whilst having cuddles.

AIBU in thinking that hot drinks and young children just don't mix?!

If im not BU should i have said/say something in the future?

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2011 21:57

Hot drinks are a necessity!

As long as it's done sensibly there is no reason not to hold a baby and drink your cup of tea without incident!

As soon as ds was on the go then hot drinks are put out of reach until I am ready to drink it. He is told to be careful when I am drinking it because it's hot. He doesn't nap at all and Im not waiting all day to have a hot drink just because of a small possibility an accident may happen!

youarekidding · 10/09/2011 21:58

YANBU.

BUT what I don't get is why you handed the visitor a hot drink whilst they were holding your baby, or offered one while they were. Just say 'i'll do you a swap', take the child and hand over drink.

Even now my DS is 7yo when I have friends for coffee, I serve it at the dining table and put a plate of goodies there so they don't feel like it's a strict order but just a nice safe place to drink.

Mindyou now they can be kicked out in the street/ the park opposite to play my friend and I enjoyed coffee on the sofa and a peaceful chat this afternoon. Grin

SemperUbiSubUbi · 10/09/2011 21:58

No one is saying dont have a hot drink, just dont do it within reach of a bloody baby/toddler. Keep the hot drink away from them!

DogsBestFriend · 10/09/2011 21:58

Your point is put across and comprehended perfectly well, Semper, as well you know. It's just not the only point nor is it universally agreed with.

TidyDancer · 10/09/2011 21:59

DBF, I'm seeing a giant judgey finger pointing down at you in a 'Your Country Needs You' style. Grin

Sirzy · 10/09/2011 22:01

If I am sat drinking it then it is in reach of a toddler, either that or he is left unsupervised!

Like I said it is perfectly possible to drink a hot drink and have a toddler around without any significant danger to anyone.

DogsBestFriend · 10/09/2011 22:01

My country wouldn't have a clue what to do with me if it got me! :o

DogsBestFriend · 10/09/2011 22:01

:o

SemperUbiSubUbi · 10/09/2011 22:02

Of course I dont expect everyone to agree with my opinions, I dont agree with everyone elses, I just honestly dont see why people were pounced on for not wanting hot drinks near their small children for fear of scalding them.

Honestly? Whats wrong with that?

takethisonehereforastart · 10/09/2011 22:02

Thanks, Milsean. I don't think I said anyone else was wrong exactly (that's not what I meant to say anyway), only that having seen what this risk can do, I agree with the OP that holding a hot drink and a baby at the same time is not a risk I'd want to take or have anyone else take with my son. And that as she feels so strongly about it, she wouldn't be unreasonable to say so the next time someone tried.

naturalbaby · 10/09/2011 22:03

there seems to bit of a theme so far - most/all of the accidents referred to were not caused by the parent of the child?

this isn't about how we drink hot drinks while holding our kids/babies, it's about visitors who are unfamiliar with the baby/child.

in my home i'll have the last word on the health and safety of my kids and when i'm out with them it's my job to cast my health and safety judgement on their every move and every person and object in their near vicinity.

DogsBestFriend · 10/09/2011 22:03

youarekidding, am I getting this right... that you put hot drinks at a higher level than a coffee table or similar and don't give guests the option of sitting on the sofa holding a hot drink because of your seven year old? Confused

DogsBestFriend · 10/09/2011 22:05

"i'll have the last word on the health and safety of my kids"

Agree 100% naturalbaby, whatever the risk/supposed risk.

BimboNo5 · 10/09/2011 22:17

Doug why did a lady from surestart whine about not having a hot drink? Who stopped her? Why? Confused

heystupid · 10/09/2011 22:22

add cold water to tea for visitors making tea cooler

yellowkiwi · 10/09/2011 22:27

I was always really careful with hot drinks when my ds was a baby. He was a really curious toddler too so I always put my cuppa out of his reach. When he was 18 months we were on holiday, I was making tea on a unit that I didn't realise was lower than the one at home, poured the boiling water in and in the time it took me to turn to get the milk he had reached up and tipped the tea all over him.

Not sure that has any relevance to the thread but it was bloody horrible.

SouthernFriedTofu · 10/09/2011 22:39

I have to fly a lot with my DCs and I get so fed up of seeing everyone else end their meal with a hot drink. I'm always asked if I want one, but I would never consider saying yes. Sometimes I say, "That's probably not a good idea with her on my lap, is it?"

lostinafrica why do you say that? It's quite rude really. If they didn't offer it to a woman because they felt it unsafe half of mumsnet would be up in arms over discrimitation and being told what to. It's their job to offer and it is your job as a parent to judge the risks involved.

Btw OP I think YANBU

SpeedyGonzalez · 10/09/2011 22:42

What about cold drinks in glasses on the patio? A tot could easily crash into you, you drop the glass and it's all gone Bloody Mary.

Use plastic cups, everyone! No! Don't - you'll get cancer if you put a hot drink in there!

PEOPLE! Do - not - drink! I repeat! DO - NOT - DRINK!

whackamole · 10/09/2011 22:49

I agree with you, and remember my dad getting incensed when a friend of his asked him to put down his cup of tea when he was holding her newborn. His argument was that he never dropped a cuppa on me so why would he do it now?

Accidents happen, I would rather err on the side of safety when it comes to a tiny baby.

shelfy74 · 10/09/2011 23:10

Christ, what's wrong with people. Can you not do without a hot drink around small children? You won't die. Tea does not have the addictive qualities of crack. Have a cold drink. Ffs.

ddubsgirl · 10/09/2011 23:16

my fil got a bollocking from the midwife when i had just had my twins as he was stood next to the cot with a cuppa in his hand!

ConstanceNoring · 10/09/2011 23:40

Bit late to this but, Hully you've been a bit of an arse on this one , unusually so. Doug is immensely humourous in the face of many things she has to deal with, but the subject of burns is too close and too painful to joke about, hopefully you'll read back and appreciate that. Smile. < not a passive aggressive one either.

fourkids · 10/09/2011 23:55

"Of course I dont expect everyone to agree with my opinions, I dont agree with everyone elses, I just honestly dont see why people were pounced on for not wanting hot drinks near their small children for fear of scalding them."

I think it's about people not wanting to be told (or it be inferred) that they are in some way lacking as good, caring parents because they choose to have a cup of tea/coffee while their small DCs are about/they are holding their baby.

the title of the thread is "hot drinks shouldn't be held when holding young children". if it read, "AIBU to not allow anyone to hold a hot drink when they are holding MY baby?" it would be different.

FWIW one of my DCs required hospital treatement for a burn after her grandfather spilled hot coffee down her. I was mad as hell because I knew he couldn't be trusted to be careful enough and had asked him minutes before to not hold it if he was holding her...and he took no notice, in fact told me not to be so silly.

However, I've spent a great deal of my adult life holding my small children, and am in the camp that says, " I'd have never had a cup of coffee!" And you might say that a cup of coffee is not essential - have water. To which I would reply that coffee is nectar sent by the gods to get you through the day when you have several small (and not so small any more) children.

The gist of this thread seems to me to be that absolutely, everyone has the right to ban hot drinks around their children...but not to tell everyone else that they should do the same.

Floggingmolly · 11/09/2011 00:05

hullygully. You're being an insensitive arse.

Moominsarescary · 11/09/2011 00:57

We always put hot drinks out of reach usually on the windowsil as my sister knocked into the table when she was 18 months old any the tea fell on her

I was 4 and can still remember her screaming when it burnt her, mum put ger under the cold tap and my nana ran across the road to get a women who was a nurse who had to peel her wool dress off her ( skin and all)

Bloody awful

Swipe left for the next trending thread