to worry about seeing older and older children in buggies?

[mariebl]

In the last couple of years I've really started to notice many more children in buggies, some of them must be almost school age.
I also very often see them looking unhappy and bored and trying to get out and being told off for being "naughty".

I'm beginning to think it must be my age as not too many years back there didn't really seem to BE any buggies for older children, babies went in prams, when they started toddling they had reins and when they got tired people picked them up and carried them for a bit.

I appreciate that there are children with conditions where having that transport is helpful and necessary but I also believe that having older and older children in buggies is a recent trend which is in danger of becoming the norm. We are also told we have a child obesity crisis and are told that children do not get enough exercise.
Am I being judgemental to say is this kind of trend a part of it?

it doesn't worry me personally. If they do it, presumably there is a reason for it.

DS1 was in a buggy until 5, still would be if he could get away with it! He has AS, no mobility issues other than fatigue/ hypermobility,

DS2 is 2.8 and I can't get the git little angel into the buggy most days. So have to do messages at 2 year old speed, argh.

Nac "messages"?? Is that a Scottish term, have some vague memories of sandwiches being called messages in Scotland from much loved holidays there. It means errands right? (loves colloquialisms)

Northern Irish! Just means going up the street really

Dd is 3 next month an I didn't realise I had to justify buggy use. She walks a lot, rides a bike, swims, takes part in lots of activity and has a healthy varied diet. Not on her way to obesity but still goes in her buggy from time to time. I cannot expect her to walk round all the time and she still sometimes naps. I can't physically carry her for long so when she's had enough she gets in the buggy. She does not go in the buggy to the supermarket, nor does she go in the trolley (is that one ok or not?). Why would a 3-5 year old be able to walk as much as an adult?

I also don't understand why people think this is a new thing? As a child did you really pay attention to children in buggies? I was born in the 80s and the only thing I can remember is people used to leave prams outside shops. I couldn't tell you what type of prams/buggies people used or how old the children where. In fact up until having DD I didn't really notice this. I suppose one reason could be that we used to go to the local town centre or supermarket for shopping when we needed to whereas now people go to huge malls and spend all day there.

Nac and Mitmoo not wishing to hijack but when I was a child in the North of England a child send to the shops for something was said to be "running a message" or "going on a message".

Seriously? People are agreeing with the OP?

I suppose if you've never done this yourself, then perhaps you just have never been in a situation where you have wanted to do it or indeed needed to do it.

I started a thread the other day about my four year old who has no road sense, and wondering how to prevent him running into the car park when I am carrying a lot of bags of shopping, or keep him safe when we walk along a very busy road to school.

one of the suggestions was to use a buggy, and tbh it's that or reins or a potentially dead child.

Reins will make him scream while a buggy is usually quite acceptable to him.

I would be upset to see a child being forced to stay in a buggy without a good reason though, if it made them unhappy.

HTH and btw, yabu but I can hardly be bothered to tell you that. It's such a non problem and nothing to do with obesity.

an older child being made to scream in a buggy and being shouted at or sworn at comes under another heading entirely. please worry about something relevant.

Oh and yes, they still do get tired, and they muck about and won't walk in a straight line, start to cry, sit down...in the middle of the pavement...

I can't carry him and the shopping and everything else and get anywhere.

He's really heavy.

I just can't understand what other people would DO in this scenario - the only thing I can think of is that they probably use a car an awful lot so the buggy has become redundant.

Driving a 4 year oldis no worse than putting them in a buggy

One less Junior Chelsea Tractor on the pavement :o

I try not to judge because you don't know peoples circumstances, fwiw I try to make ds walk as much as poss to knacker him out. He's 21 months.

YABU - dd2 nagged me to let her go in her push chair until she was nearly 5 - not something I particularly wanted but she just would not walk and I didn't have time to wait while she dawdled along at a snail's pace, moaning, nor could I have carried her, she was too heavy! Dd3 is different - she's 2 and will walk a lot by herself already and doesn't often even ask to be carried. All kids are different.

Oh whatmeworry you are splitting my sides with your incisive wit and humour.

Not.

Hell I need my ds in the buggy to balance all the shopping hanging off the back.
[Long walks and no car].
He is 2 but I will still do it when he is 3.
Tend to be car drivers that comment I find. Ignore, ignore......

DD (3.7) occasionally goes in the buggy. She will absolutely look unhappy then because the reason she is in the buggy is because she has proved herself too naughty independent-thinking to behave herself properly in the shops. She demonstrated this recently by slipping my hand and bolting the entire length of the busy shopping centre. So, next time out she goes in the buggy as a little reminder of what it's like to be a baby who can't behave herself. The ratio is generally 10:1 in favour of buggy-free outings. It is getting less frequent. Is that ok?

Generally speaking, buggy judgers can sod off!

YANBU - I haven't read whole thread - know how it will have gone

I do think people use buggies more than they used to. My friend has always strapped her son into the buggy. The minute he gets out he legs it as far as possible, no matter where they are. It's now a vicious circle as she 'can't' let him out cos he runs off, he runs off cos he's never let out. It's sad and funny to see - he's a lovely boy but has never been given an opportunity to learn boundaries as he's always physically restrained instead of explained to.

There is a differnece between what OP said and some of the replies - yes there are lots of reason to use a buggy but many mums use them for an easier life. It takes ages to bimble along with a toddler and we're all soooo busy

I have a lot of respect for people who walk a few miles 'into town' and totally understand why they use a buggy. As I live in a rural village I am a car owner so this doesn't apply to me. Although when DD was 2 we lived in a city and she refused to use it so we just got out of using a buggy very early.

That said, I think there ARE an increasing number of parents who use a buggy to walk 2 minutes into a shop and out. I don't judge them, maybe they have a bolter or the child has SEN but I have a niggling feeling that at least a portion of them don't. IF that is the case then I do think getting a child on their feet is a good idea, but looking at people in public I have no idea who is who so I keep my nose out of it frankly.

My dd has hyper mobility and gets tired really quickly. About a mile is her limit or she starts to really complain of the pain and her joints are obviously inflamed if I try to push her too far. My mother used to lecture me about how she was too old for a buggy, but after she saw her crying in pain after a long walk and saw how puffy her knees were she now insists we take a buggy on days out. So what if people look at us and think my dd is lazy and pandered to because she still occasionally uses a buggy? I don't really care tbh, I'm protecting my child from pain and also protecting her joints in the hope that she won't have crippling arthritis like me by the time she is in her 30's. I wish that my own mother had listened a little more to my complaining of joint pain and a little less time worrying what other people think about my still being in a buggy, if she had, I might not be in the state I am now.
For the record my dd is a very active child in short bursts, she is thin to the point of being skinny despite eating like a horse, so I don't worry at all that she is lazy, but she does have a real physical problem that necessitates the use of a pushchair on days out and on long walks.

busybee i was so at the man 'is that what happened to you- shall i get my husband to beat you up knock the stupid out of you' I ranted .

My mum wasnt a earth mother and snout out was probably the least inoffensive phrase she used .

I don't judge any individual child in a buggy, or parent driving a child a short distance or anything else. Because I don't know their circumstances and any number of things could be going on.

I do however think that too many children are being driven and taken in buggies when they could walk. And that is not great for them really.

It is exactly the same as the way I don't judge any individual I see who has obesity. But I think obesity rates are a problem.

I think you can be concerned about a trend without judging the individuals iyswim.

DD2 is now 4. She has multiple issues with her feet/legs/spine that mean she can't walk more than about 50 yards without collapsing from exhaustion or crying from her legs hurting. An outsider wouldn't have a clue she has these problems as she looks 'normal'.

YABU.

Agreeing with Riven re changing expectations & Pag re "There is a problem trend".

^It would only bother me if they then insisted they had a right to the disabled loo because the 4 yo was in a pushchair.
^

Am awestruck in admiration - thats at least 200 posts worth :o

Arf at Riven lobbing a whole disabled toilet bait and switch at the thread