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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to hide upstairs?

36 replies

Schnarkle · 04/09/2011 17:34

Every second Sunday without fail, my Husband leaves the house for the entire day to spend with his friends and do blokey stuff. I'm left here with the children and the dog to carry on the normal boring house stuff as normal.

So, last Sunday was a really shitty day and to top the day off nicely baby wouldn't sleep. I was up and down the stairs until 11pm when he finally nodded off. Brilliant timing as 5 minutes later my husband arrives home, fully refreshed from his matey day out.

After about 15 minutes of me ranting about how great he has it, I said that the following Sunday I would be locking myself into my bedroom and acting as if I wasn't home for the entire day. I'd love to go out but I'm broke and have zero cash to do anything with.

I came up here at 3pm after dinner was eaten and all dishes were put away. I have not referred to my plan all week and I'm up here now with laptop, kindle and chocolate.

Husband, every so often strolls into the room with the baby (1 yr old) to see what I'm doing and trying to offload the child to me.

So AIBU to stay up here?

OP posts:
Jbck · 04/09/2011 17:36

Absolutely not. WHat's sauce for the goose and all that!

broomformychin · 04/09/2011 17:37

As long as you've got plenty of things to keep you entertained and plenty of snacks then yadnbu Smile

AKissIsNotAContract · 04/09/2011 17:37

YANBU, but how come he has money to go out with his mates and you don't?

Cocoflower · 04/09/2011 17:38

"I'd love to go out but I'm broke and have zero cash to do anything with."

Hang on! So DH can spend money on him going out but you dont deserve the same?

Why is entertainment money not split equally? Why does only one benefit? I would be furious!

Takitezee · 04/09/2011 17:38

AKissIsNotAContract just posted exactly what I was going to ask.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 04/09/2011 17:42

It's rarely a good plan to go back on your word.

You told dh a week ago that today you would be not be available for the day and now he needs to know that you mean what you say.

Who cooked lunch and cleared up?

Walking is free; even if you have no spare dosh, you can still enjoy a mooch around the neighbourhood for an hour or two.

Original poster
Schnarkle · 04/09/2011 17:43

Oh he's not spending cash either. He goes to friend's house and they "hang out" for the day. > Seemingly they've done this since college days.

As I type now, again he's come into the room with the baby and looking at me as if i've had some sort of melt down. I think he's confuzzled Grin

OP posts:
FredBare · 04/09/2011 17:45

and is he over the age of 16? i presume not if he needs to hang out

slavetofilofax · 04/09/2011 17:48

Have you got a lock on the door? If so, use it! Or at least use the one in the bathroom when you go and have a long bubble bath in an hour or two.

Catsmamma · 04/09/2011 17:48

oh please, next time he comes up, follow him downstairs, raise his hopes that he has brought you to your senses and then

        <strong>GRAB YOUR HOUSEKEYS/CARKEYS AND COAT AND LEAVE!</strong>
Original poster
Schnarkle · 04/09/2011 17:49

I know FredBare, I know. (well over 16 btw)

I've said this until I'm blue in the face. So this strike is my next course of action.

I think a trip to the local 24 hour shops is in order. Doesn't cost anything to walk around as Izzywhizzy has pointed out.

OP posts:
Original poster
Schnarkle · 04/09/2011 17:50

Ohhh catsmamma I love it...that's what I'm going to do . he's just gone down stairs so will follow now .....

OP posts:
ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 04/09/2011 17:51

YANBU. Do you have enough supplies? Or do you need local MNers to start randomly turning up at your house? "Just bringing chocolate for Schnarkle", "Schnarkle said she's taking the day off so I thought I'd bring her some trashy magazines"

PS - I particularly appreciate your use of the word 'confuzzled'

cleanteeth · 04/09/2011 17:52

Haha I love this thread!

You may have the kindle and chocolate but you've forgotten one vital ingredient....where's the Wine?!

crystalglasses · 04/09/2011 17:53

Ejoy your family free Sunday. Everyone needs a break and some 'me' time. just make sure you do it every alternate Sunday, and get enough money together to at least go to the cinema, go for a swim or have a coffee and mooch around a shopping centre if you've got one nearby.

carabos · 04/09/2011 17:54

This is what is known in our household as a "what's the matter with her?" moment. Years ago I did a similar thing - went on strike and they (DH, DSs 1&2) came home to find me on the sofa watching telly, drinking wine and eating crisps - no dinner made or anything else done (I was making a point about being treated as a skivvy). The kids looked at DH and said in unison "What's the matter with her?" in an astonished and whiney way. YANBU so stick to your plan. Grand gestures work much better with men than reasoned argument.

cat64 · 04/09/2011 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TheSkiingGardener · 04/09/2011 17:55

Have a good mooch and enjoy his confuzzleddom

carpwidow · 04/09/2011 17:57

The only thing that concerns me Schnarkle is that the children are very young and might wonder why you are snubbing them. They're too young to understand the point you are trying to make. I therefore think it might be better to actually leave the house and go somewhere with your kindle. :)

UrsulaBuffayHere2Help · 04/09/2011 17:57

Like fuck would my DH be doing that every week. He tried the 'oh but we've always done this, since college' for a while until we had 'the talk'. The talk essentially is this:

You're a fucking grown up and a Father now. Act like one.

Empusa · 04/09/2011 17:58

YANBU!

I hope you are enjoying your relaxing time! :)

Selky · 04/09/2011 17:58

Stay firmly on the bed with the Kindle.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 04/09/2011 18:00

YABU. You should have left the house first thing this morning Grin

Of course then you wouldn't be able to update us all!

Zimm · 04/09/2011 19:07

He has every second Sunday off? How selfish if you do not get the same. Selfish, selfish, selfish. You are owed loads of Sundays in bed OP!

ruletheworld · 04/09/2011 19:11

I don't think this thread is amusing at all.

Your dickhead husband ditches the children on you EVERY sunday to do FUCK ALL.

I would not be with him. No way.

It's not about 'teaching him a lesson' - this situation should never have been going on in the first place.

What are you going to do long-term to sort this out?