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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that a hospital should have a female gynecologist?

330 replies

crazyspaniel · 03/09/2011 21:35

My local hospital only has male gynecologists. If I want to see a female practitioner I have to travel 40 miles. In the end I went to my local hospital and found the whole experience somewhat traumatic - the fact that the doctors were male was part of the reason for finding it so horrible and humiliating.

Is it really so hard to hire a female gynecologist? I get that consultants are often of a generation when not many women went into medicine (and particularly surgery), but there are now more women than men becoming doctors and one of the doctors in the room was SHO level (or whatever they call them now), so not of that generation. I really think this is one area of medicine where there should be female quotas and where each hospital should have at least one female practitioner.

OP posts:
SouthernFriedTofu · 03/09/2011 23:40

yes

abitlikemollflanders · 03/09/2011 23:48

Yes, the HSG was one of the procedures I had to endure throughout my fertility investigations. I had to wait because again I requested all female staff to be present. The consultant again was fab, although I had to wait because the radiologlist who was usually there was on maternity leave, at least I was given the choice.
I wish I was like those of you who had no preference, believe me. It would have made various aspects of my life much easier.

lachesis · 03/09/2011 23:50

YABU. Go private if you want a certain gender and you're not willing to wait or travel.

Cathycat · 03/09/2011 23:56

Having had 4 children and various additional examinations, I would agree with the op. It would be nice to have the option to see a female gynaecologist!

kelly2000 · 03/09/2011 23:59

It does not bother me, and to be honest I would prefer a male midwife. The weird thing is that a few years ago apparently men were barred from being midwives due to the sensetivities, yet they could be gynecologists! I think hospitals should give you the choice, but I guess if there are not enough gynecologists there are not enough. At least you could be seen by a male gynecologist, in some countries women cannot get an education, yet women cannot see male gynecologists, not exactly great if you have complications.

lachesis · 04/09/2011 00:03

Get some help with your phobia.

lachesis · 04/09/2011 00:09

'The majority of women will suffer form sort of sexual abuse in their life, maybe many of them would prefer not have to have male doctor staring between their legs. '

I was raped by my best friend's brother's flatmate, a man, when I was 18. I got lots of counselling because I didn't want what he did to me to endanger my life and health.

If I'm ill or in pain, I just want the best person who can help, regardless of gender, thanks to this counselling.

If you have a phobia or PTSD from sexual abuse, please see your GP and get a referral.

I mean, you can have a smear, and if there's a problem, it may be you're in the same situation where you have to go see GYN who is male, and it isn't a good idea, healthwise, to wait.

So get the phobia addressed, IMO.

sothisismenow · 04/09/2011 00:26

I completely agree with Seven's post. I have no gender preference for medical procedures, I've had great and awful experiences with both (limited experiences to be fair but 2 children so various examinations etc).
Sothernfried - I would take exception to the statement that the majority of women have suffered sexual abuse. What do you base this statement on?

piprabbit · 04/09/2011 00:28

Female doctors can be as dismissive and patronising as their male colleagues.

While a male doctor may not be able to fully understand the impact of an intimate procedure on a female, female doctors can also fail to empathise. I know several people who have had bad experiences when female doctors have told them that they are exaggerating their period pain, morning sickness etc.

I had a female GP who told me my pelvic pain was my hip joint and when I persisted gave me an unnecessary internal examination. I was subsequently diagnosed with endometriosis by a male doctor.

exoticfruits · 04/09/2011 08:30

I hate the double standard-imagine the fuss if a man said that he wouldn't be seen by a female doctor! And yet not only is it OK for a woman to say she doesn't want a male one, but they can even suggest that a hospital puts gender as the first consideration in a job interview.
I would hope that they would have equal opportunities and the best person for the job-regardless of gender.

Cereal · 04/09/2011 08:34

YABU

Animation · 04/09/2011 08:38

Why are many male gynaecologists gorgeous looking as well.

Mine was. Made me more nervous than I might have been!

TheHumanCatapult · 04/09/2011 08:39

Op not sure if you have children

But i have 4 and afte dd who is my 3rd the only thing i used to look at obs/gyne wise was how big are there hands

but emabarrsemtn went out windown by time had ds1 who wa smy first and ds2 i had a male midwife who was fab and infact went on to have him for ds3

toddlerama · 04/09/2011 08:46

I felt the exact same way as the OP. Went through my first pregnancy shaking and crying everytime I needed examination, but ultimately had to get through it. Second pregnancy was easier, third I hope will be better still.

The one thing I cannot deal with under any circumstances is a male dentist. I just can't do it. I don't know exactly why, could be linked to sexual abuse or I could just be a bit weird, but it isn't that unusual OP. However, YABU to expect hospitals to hire on this basis. I have to shop around for dentists to find one with female dentists available. My last one left to have children the selfish bag Grin

ballstoit · 04/09/2011 08:47

YABU. I'd have some sympathy if you'd been told there were no women at all. However, you had the opportunity to see a female gynae and chose not to because you didn't want to travel. In some parts of the country, you would have to travel 40 miles to see any specialist, if you choose not to, that's not the NHS's responsibility.

magicmelons · 04/09/2011 08:53

I have mixed feelings about this, I don't think the op is being completely UR I would rather see my female nurse for my Smear and would personally prefer a female midwife, I have male gynae docs and female gynae docs before and experience of both has been mixed. It's reasonable to want to have the choice espescially if you have issues with being examined. Where I work, the male drs usually ref the women to females for intimate exams but that's for there own comfort as much as the patients.

Notchattingnow · 04/09/2011 08:58

I can empathise with the op in that intimate examination might be more embarrassing from a male gynaecologist than female, depending on the individual.
Examinations such as hysteroscopy can be quite uncomfortable and I think they tend to dismiss this a bit ime as they see it as necessary and need to get on with the job.
Male and female can be equally dismissive.

exoticfruits · 04/09/2011 09:08

I think it is a bit laughable that all female gynaecologists are going to be sensitive and understanding! It is a personality thing-which is no doubt why the hospital chose the best person for the job and didn't tinker because of gender.
My male gynaecologist was the nicest doctor that I have ever encountered. He was a specialist and I had to travel to see him.
OP can see a female one-she just has to put herself out a bit, which is fair enough if she doesn't want what is on offer. It is just a bit much to say that it should be on offer because people don't want to travel.

exoticfruits · 04/09/2011 09:09

Once you have had a baby I can't see why anyone is ever sensitive about it again!!

Notchattingnow · 04/09/2011 09:10

have to say.. midwives can be incredibly bossy and know- allish sometimes... my last labour i had an older midwife who was a bit over confident and should have definitely called for medical help sooner...

Animation · 04/09/2011 09:26

When it comes down to it I guess we're very lucky to have a gynaecologist full stop. We take it for granted. How awful it must be living in another country with gynaecological problems and can't afford treatment - or having to take out massive loans.

IWantAnotherBaby · 04/09/2011 09:37

YABU

Firstly, as others have said, it is all about who was the best applicant for each post as it came up; gender discrimination is illegal in the UK.
Secondly, we doctors get to choose our careers just as everyone else; many women are 'encouraged' towards gynaecology, but it is generally not a family-friendly career path (since it is a surgical speciality, with a high proportion of emergency work eg the obstetric side) so IME many women choose other options because of that.

In an ideal world patients should have a choice, but I find it quite irritating, as a female GP, that a lot of women insist on seeing me when they would actually be better off, say, seeing a nurse (eg when they assume I will be better at doing their smear, and demand it, despite the fact that I do maybe 20 per year while our superb practice nurse does 200+). If they want to see me because they think they will need a vaginal exam or whatever and they feel more comfortable seeing me then fair enough, but it has sometimes meant that they (dangerously) put off, for example, a breast examination when they have found a lump, so they can see me in 2 weeks rather than a more-than-competent male colleague the same day...

Oh and for the poster who wondered about the fuss if a man demanded to see a male professional; it happens a lot and there is no fuss whatsoever; many men prefer another man for intimate examinations, and as a result I see relatively few men who have erectile problems or testicular lumps etc.

Animation · 04/09/2011 09:37

I've often wondered though why far more male doctors than female choose to be gynaecologists at the end of doctor's training.

exoticfruits · 04/09/2011 13:18

Maybe women know that some women are going to find it difficult for anyone to examine them, and prefer to opt for something that no one has issues about.

lachesis · 04/09/2011 13:33

Again, if it's the point where you're putting off smear tests of not having children, then it's a phobia rather than just wanting a choice and you need to have that treated. Because again, you can have a smear test and it'll likely be performed by a female, but if there's anything wrong and you have to go to colposcopy clinic, or have treatment, then it's take what you get (or if you want to wait and endanger your health even further).

I've had plenty of intimate exams, having had cervical dysplasia, missed MC, three children (including two instrumental deliveries) and breast biopsy and had both male and female docs. As long as they are competent and respectful, I just want it sorted out and to be on my way.

My dad had a female urologist for prostate cancer. People asked if he was bothered. He said, 'Yeah, the thought of dying of cancer was very bothersome.' He wouldn't have cared if it were a trained chimp, as long as he/she got the fecking tumor OUT.