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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have taken my 2.5 year old out of the car

50 replies

biddysmama · 31/08/2011 21:28

and told her she either got in her car seat or she wasnt going in the car?

she was refusing and arching her back and kicking me, so i took her out,shut the door and told her "no car seat, no car!" in the car park of a supermarket

i got tutted at and mumbled about by some people passing.

OP posts:
OrganicFreeRangeBoys · 31/08/2011 21:30

YANBU.

I would've done the same and actually, probably have on more than one occasion!

pieceofpie · 31/08/2011 21:30

Ignore the people tutting, her safety is paramount and you did the right thing. :)

ChippingIn · 31/08/2011 21:32

YANBU

It has a very familiar ring to it Grin

They probably wanted you to spend half an hour saying 'come on now darling, mummy wummy would weeel weeely like you to sit in your car seat...yadda yadda yadda'.

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 31/08/2011 21:32

YANBU. What was the alternative? Not to have people tutting and letting your daughter rattle around in the car with no seatbelt?

Bit of a no brainer (gawd, that saying annoys me).

rhetorician · 31/08/2011 21:34

YADNBU - my dd is at exactly the same stage of irrational awfulness - I carried her out of a shop today yelling 'put me down, put me down'...the people who tut can discipline her if they want...

worraliberty · 31/08/2011 21:34

I'm genuinely starting to think I'm the only Mother on MN who has never to my knowledge been tutted at, mumbled about, confronted or thrown a dirty look for disciplining my children while out in public.

Either I'm totally oblivious to that sort of thing or I'm too interested in my kids to notice.

But honestly, I've been a Mum for almost 20yrs. I have 3 kids and this has never happened to me Confused

Lougle · 31/08/2011 21:36

To be honest, I favour the push, clip and thrust approach Grin. But if you take that approach, you are too busy timing your thrust to care what people are doing on the outside Smile

rhetorician · 31/08/2011 21:36

actually I can't honestly say that anyone tutted at me - I think on the whole people respect parents who discipline their children in a firm way; if they were tutting at me for dragging her, hitting her or shouting at her they would be right. But perhaps I am oblivious too...

herbietea · 31/08/2011 21:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

DaydreamDolly · 31/08/2011 21:46

YANBU I would have done exactly the same. I got given a filthy look by a young mum a few months back when 2yr old DD threw a wobbler outside Waitrose, I was gob smacked actually, as I would never do this to another parent of a small child. I always look on in sympathy and feel smug relieved it's not me, this time Grin

defrocked · 31/08/2011 21:51

i would have just given her a whack on the arse and strapped her in

FigsAndWine · 31/08/2011 22:03

YANBU at all!

I would have invited the tutters to explain to me how they would have done things so much better?

StopRainingPlease · 31/08/2011 22:04

Trouble is, what to do when you're on your way to the supermarket and she doesn't want to go anyway Grin.

FairyArmadillo · 31/08/2011 22:12

YANBU I don't much much tolerance for judgey tutters, especially if they are parents themselves.

Rowena8482 · 31/08/2011 22:27

I am the mother who screams at DH "just hold him down and FASTEN it for God's sake" when he faffs about trying to persuade our tantrumming child to get in the carseat. I could just about care less what passersby think, all of us are in our seats, properly fastened into whatever seat/restraint we need to keep us safe, or the car isn't moving. YANBU!

MightyQuim · 31/08/2011 22:55

YANBU but how did you get home? Or have I got the wrong end of the stick entirely?

TheDreamWeaver · 31/08/2011 23:50

YANBU.
My kids think we WILL crash if they aren't belted in.....not because I've told them, but because if they don't belt up immediately I've said "DO YOU WANT TO CRASH!?" so they just made the assumption. I've never disabused them of this:o

PotatoesOfTheCarribean · 31/08/2011 23:52

I'm with defrocked

DS gets PUT in his car seat, like it or bloody not.

JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 01/09/2011 00:16

Yanbu, done it many times and ill do it again. Even on the layby of a motorway when she's unbuckled mid journey. No carseat, no car!

GalaxyWeaver · 01/09/2011 00:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RedOnion · 01/09/2011 00:23

Don't get why people would be tutting and mumbling. What is unusual about what you did?

Did you post for praise?

CogitoErgoSometimes · 01/09/2011 07:58

YANBU... my emergency car-seat technique around that age was 'brute force'. Used to have a cat that refused to go into its basket for the vet - same sort of thing. Expect I got a few funny looks along the way but I'm far too thick-skinned to notice.

Morloth · 01/09/2011 08:28

Nope worra you are not alone.

I too live in a different world to most MNers. Where mostly people are as oblivious to me as I am to them.

Never been tutted at, always had a seat offered when needed, mostly me and the world get on just fine. The only interactions I can report when it comes to my kids are people being kind and/or sympathetic.

As for the OP, YANBU, however what was the plan if she said 'OK' and didn't want to get in the car?

Kids go in carseats when I say they are going in the carseat, they can whinge, they can bitch, they can scream. But they will do it.

limetrees · 01/09/2011 08:33

YANBU.

However, at that age, I wrestled with them until they were strapped in. Zero tolerance in this area!

Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 01/09/2011 08:35

"no car seat no car" would have constituted a victory in my DD's eyes (same age). She doesn't want to get in the car, that's her point. I just employ my superior strength and get her in, frankly.

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