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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Drama in a Lift - WIBU ?

29 replies

elmofan · 28/08/2011 11:49

Last weekend i went away for a family get together with all of my extended family (17 of us)
I suffer from Claustrophobia (passed on from my DM who in the last five years has become to love lifts ) and lifts scare the hell out of me to the extent that i actually get light headed . Now my dh and family have always urged me to try overcome my fear of lifts , so on this weekend i decided to give the lift a go(not wanting to pass my fears onto my dc) . 11 of us got inside - 8 adults and 3 children, then the lift stopped on the 2nd floor to let more people in , i had already noticed the sign that said "no more than 12 people" so i gently pointed this out when the doors opened . A man held the doors open while he counted all of us in the lift , he stood there for 3 minutes waiting on his wife and child to catch up (panic rising up inside me) and argued that he & his wife and daughter would be fine getting into the lift - i pointed out that this would mean that there was two people too many in the lift and he ignored me and entered with his family , I got out of the lift with dd & ds and walked down the stairs as i could hear a "grinding noise " under the lift .
WIBU to storm out ? or was this man just rude to hold the lift up and then insist on getting inside with his family knowing it was overloading the lift .

OP posts:

DoMeDon · 28/08/2011 11:52

Neither of you WBU. Too many people ofetn get in lifts - it happens, people rarely count how many are in there. Bearing in mind your phobia, you did what was necessary to cope by getting out.

squeakytoy · 28/08/2011 11:54

The lift would have made the noise anyway, and you could get 12 fat people in, or 12 skinny people, and there would be a huge difference in weight.

You were not being unreasonable, but in all honesty, you would have been absolutely fine unless 12 sumo wrestlers had got in, in which case the weight balance could have been affected.

ghostofstalbans · 28/08/2011 11:55

yesterday there were lots of us in the lift, then one woman ran to catch it and got in. there was a load bleep and the lift informed us that it was over loaded. felt sorry for the woman!

so i imagine similar things are in place for all lifts!

worraliberty · 28/08/2011 11:56

Are you sure it was 3 minutes or did it just seem that long? He could have waited for the lift to return empty in that time.

Good on you for getting in the lift though. My DH is claustraphobic and he wouldn't have got in, especially with 11 people in there...let alone the extra 2 wanting to enter.

ChaosTrulyReigns · 28/08/2011 11:56

I think it's probably to do with the weight of people in the lift (there's normally some weight limit posted). So, as some of the occupants mentioned were DC, you probably would have been safe.

Congratulations on your bravery, though.

worraliberty · 28/08/2011 11:57

Oh yes, meant to say....

The amount of people is only a guideline.

What matters is the weight..not how many passengers. The fact some of them were children would have brought the maximum load weight down I would imagine.

MrsPresley · 28/08/2011 11:58

I think the 12 people might be just a guide, after all 12 toddlers will weigh a lot less as opposed to say 12 18 stone rugby players.

But well done in getting in the lift in the first place!

iklboo · 28/08/2011 11:59

Well done for trying to overcome your fear. Do keep trying.

Birdsgottafly · 28/08/2011 12:00

12 peoaple means 12 adults of average weight. So you were being over cautious. " DC's count as 1 adult or just under, so 5 DC's are 2 people iyswim.

This isn't about who was unreasonable, you were not ready to travel in a crowded lift. take small steps to overcome your fear and try without your DC's present, otherwise you will make them fearful.

Original poster

elmofan · 28/08/2011 12:08

Thanks but in all honesty i did not feel brave at all i felt sick and shaky

worra it really was 3minutes he held the doors open waiting on his wife and child who hadn't even left their room yet . cheeky fecker

Yes the dc's were two 12yr old boys and one 5yr old ,so they would have been lighter than the adults .

I did manage to get back inside the lift with dh and my two dc later that night going back to our room and everything was fine

OP posts:

stellarpunk · 28/08/2011 12:11

Yes, there will be a safe working load limit inside the lift but don't forget that there will also be a margin for safety as well. (Don't know % off the top of my head, perhaps someone could supply?).

However, when reading your post I wondered if perhaps you have a mild form of claustrophobia? After all shoehorning more than the maximum number of people in the lift would have left you all like sardines.

Anyway re lifts, try not to worry. There are many mechanical fail safes involved in lift design. All that nonsense about cutting the cable and the lift falling would not happen- there are extra brakes on the mechanism above the car which trip if the cable breaks.

Hope that helps.

Birdsgottafly · 28/08/2011 12:14

Don't focus on what went wrong on that occassion, but on the fact that you manage to travel in a lift later on, well done.

Just keep trying when it is less busy.

Kayano · 28/08/2011 12:15

Not to add to the People/ weight issue but a lot of lifts especially older ones use the 12 people standard on average adult weight as they were years and years ago.

So, as a phobia sufferer myself you WNBU and I wouldn't have stayed. There was an episode of aircrash investigation a few tears ago when a plane crashed due to them calculating weight on number of people x average adult weight as per 20 years ago.

Sorry

squeakytoy · 28/08/2011 12:16

However, when reading your post I wondered if perhaps you have a mild form of claustrophobia?

I thought you read the post?

OP says...

I suffer from Claustrophobia (passed on from my DM who in the last five years has become to love lifts ) and lifts scare the hell out of me to the extent that i actually get light headed .

stellarpunk · 28/08/2011 12:25

However, when reading your post I wondered if perhaps you have a mild form of claustrophobia?

I thought you read the post? confused grin

OP says...

I suffer from Claustrophobia (passed on from my DM who in the last five years has become to love lifts ) and lifts scare the hell out of me to the extent that i actually get light headed .

Whoops, seems to be happening more and more often (not reading the whole thing or missing chunks of info.)

Anyway, whats the fuss; proves I was right, see? :)

squeakytoy · 28/08/2011 12:26

:) sorry Stellar.. I was just ribbing you.. its the sort of thing I do all the time... I am quite good at missing whole paragraphs

BlowHole · 28/08/2011 12:28

I feel the same about lifts, but I think the fact that there were 3 children would have brought the average weight down, however I would probably have also got out, because the lift being so crowded would have been too much to bear.
Anyway, look on the bright side, using the stairs will keep you fitter

halcyondays · 28/08/2011 12:47

I can't say it has ever occurred to me to count the number of people in a lift. If there is space I get in, if it looks too full, I'd wait for the next one.

halcyondays · 28/08/2011 13:04

He was rude to hold the lift up though.

Original poster

elmofan · 28/08/2011 13:27

I must admit to being fit to explode at him as he stood there doing a head count rather than taking my word for the amount of people in the lift and asking me to "show" him where the sign says "no more than 12 people " of course this was just his way of delaying the lift while he waited on his wife & child .

OP posts:

muminthemiddle · 28/08/2011 13:27

Well done for getting in the lift.
Agree with the poster who said next time try with perhaps only your dh present. Or try somewhere quiet.
Can't understand people not using the stairs tbh.
Myself and friend always use the stairs as a matter of fitness (polishes halo!) and personally I am amazed at the number of people who wait for the lift rather than walk, excusing people with walking diffiuclties and pushchairs obviously.

HowAboutAHotCupOfShutTheHellUp · 28/08/2011 16:05

YANBU. And how arrogant of the man in question making people wait in the lift. That in itself would have set me off!

HowAboutAHotCupOfShutTheHellUp · 28/08/2011 16:06

And well done for trying to overcome your fears. Phobias are no joke.

MmeLindor. · 28/08/2011 16:10

He was being unreasonable.

The lifts in Germany all have signs saying how many kgs are allowed. It generally says, X people of 70 kg.

I always try to suck my stomach in and look slimmer.

Good for your for overcoming your fear though. Hope you had a good holiday.

LineRunner · 28/08/2011 16:15

The bloke was rude, and I'm surpised someone didn't ask him to wait for the next lift. I think I might have broken the great british lift silence for that one!

It's true that lifts have a built-in safety margin which is weight-based, and if it's exceeded the lift emits a beep and the lift simply will not move until someone gets out! So you can't 'accidentally' get into an unsafely overloaded lift in the UK.

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