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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that what my Mum said when I fell in the street is a little bit uncalled for?

60 replies

whatcanbemynewname · 22/08/2011 21:24

I tripped and fell taking the skin off my knee and it has swelled. However just after I fell she said "Oh well you are fat anyway so its a very heavy weight to fall over"

OP posts:
DaydreamDolly · 22/08/2011 21:41

Wow MrsGPotter I bet you don't keep friends for long with that attitude.

YANBU what she said was bitchy plain & simple. You don't expect that from your own mother. Hope you're ok OP

Original poster
whatcanbemynewname · 22/08/2011 21:42

I am slightly plump but not overly big, she knows I have a thing about my size.

OP posts:
MrsGPotter · 22/08/2011 21:42

well I suppose it depends on how you see yourself!

At the end of the day if your mum is the only person that calls you this stuff then its pretty safe to assume it's your mum with the problem!

dietstartstmoz · 22/08/2011 21:43

Whatcanbe - We obviously have the same mother!

worraliberty · 22/08/2011 21:45

Your Mum sounds a lot like my Nan

She was a very down to earth straight talking Irish lady who was lovely, but took no nonsense off of anyone.

If you were fat your were fat. She wouldn't be nasty about it but she certainly wouldn't walk on eggshells.

She probably would have said something like "Good job you've got enough padding to protect you" Grin

BimboNo5 · 22/08/2011 21:49

So if a disabled person fell out of their chair would it be okay to say 'doesnt matter if you hurt your leg, you dont use it anyway'??

Ohh yeah, sorry forgot- its only fair game to mock someone for being overweight!

musttidyupmusttidyup · 22/08/2011 21:52

YANBU. I can't imagine that I'd ever say anything so hurtful to any of my DCs, either at 3 or 30 and I'm not a v senstirive person, although I am fat cuddly. MrsG bet you're skinny yes? Wink

ineedabodytransplant · 22/08/2011 21:57

my mum's like that - she wouldn't know tact if it jumped up smacked her in gob and bit her arse.

If anyone has the misfortune to have a big red spot/boil/ whatever on their face....my mum = did you know/what's that on your face? Of course I fecking know!!

I seem to have spent the last couple of days posting about my fecking twunts of parents. They were the sort of people who had dogs/cats, not because they were animal lovers but because they could. Dogs never got walked or groomed. Cats churned out kittens like there was no tomorrow. And that's exactly how they thought about kids. Not because they wanted them. More about because they could, and the family allowance helped pay for the booze.

Oh bollocks, I am getting bitter again. Sorry allAngry

Serenitysutton · 22/08/2011 22:12

I don't really understand it- meaness aside, how is it funny? Is it a saying I've not heard before? It doesn't seem witty, or humourous...

Dawnybabe · 22/08/2011 22:15

I was picking at a boiled egg that the dc had left, before Mil could say what a waste of food it was, and instead she took me completely by surprise and said 'no wonder you're fat if you keep picking at leftovers'!

I too am a wuss and never say anything that might rock the boat.

Happygomummy · 22/08/2011 22:16

yanbu, OP

but well done for introducing a thread outing the thick-as-shit DM readers on MN

the twat-o-meter alert on this thread is sersly high!iou

Happygomummy · 22/08/2011 22:16

seriously high

arseing mousepad

carpwidow · 22/08/2011 22:19

Purely out of interest (although it's not really relevant) how old are you and your mother? It's just if she's 95 and you're 77 it doesn't seem so unkind for some bizarre reason - more Hinge and Brackett stuff really (apologies to the younger MNs - don't bother to google it though - not that exciting) :)

wannabefree · 22/08/2011 22:20

I don't actually understand her comment. Confused

carpwidow · 22/08/2011 22:20

Happygomummy - How did I score on the twatometer? Grin

SDTGisAnEvilGenius · 22/08/2011 22:21

MrsGPotter - I am overweight (and well aware of the fact) and would still be devastated to be the butt of someone's joke when I fell over. I have catastrophically low self-esteem (since my mid teens), and a comment like that would just reinforce all my negative opinions of myself - opinions that I am trying really hard to replace with positive ones. People say nice things to me, but for some reason I remember the nasty, hurtful ones - they are the ones that resonate in my head when I can't sleep, the nagging voice in the back of my head that says 'This is why you are so unworthy. No-one could really like someone like you - if they say nice things, it's just out of pity'.

Fabby - perhaps you'd like to come to one of the Glasgow meet-ups and call me fat to my face?

musttidyupmusttidyup · 22/08/2011 22:21

Grin @ OP being 77. Might've broken a hip too.

fedupofnamechanging · 22/08/2011 22:21

I think it was a cruel and hurtful thing to say. I would have been very upset too. I think you should be able to rely on your mum for kind words and I am Sad for you that your mum said this.

NonnoMum · 22/08/2011 22:21

I'm with MrsG !

NoMoreWasabi · 22/08/2011 22:21

YANBU

nevergoogle · 22/08/2011 22:22

it's called adding insult to injury.

dearprudence · 22/08/2011 22:23

YANBU. She was mean. Even if you were fat and she wanted to talk to you about it, why raise it when you've just hurt yourself?

It's such an odd comment to make. Do you think she was trying to be funny?

SDTGisAnEvilGenius · 22/08/2011 22:24

NonnoMum - even after reading my post (wondering if you cross-posted or have read it and discounted it).

MumblingRagDoll · 22/08/2011 22:26

Maybe she was embarrased or worried? My Mum always used to shout at me when I hurt myself....

carpwidow · 22/08/2011 22:26

...that resonate in my head when I can't sleep, the nagging voice in the back of my head that says 'This is why you are so unworthy. No-one could really like someone like you - if they say nice things, it's just out of pity'.
I'm trying to help here SDTG : you sound ever so unhappy and sometimes when we're down like this it's really easy to take things out of context or actually misinterpret what has been said. Think through it again. What did she actually say and how was it said? Again, I'm not doubting you, just trying to be serious (for a change) and help you think it through (p.s. how are you getting on with the itching powder-laced loo roll? ;)