to feel dismay on discovering make-up in a party bag for five-year-olds?

[parakeet]

The items were a nail polish and a pot of coloured lip gloss.

Am I really that out of touch?

Well my sons loved nail polish at that age so yamaybeu, were there any boys at the party, and if so did they get the same?

I agree with Madmomma

My reasoning is this: make-up is what women and teenage girls wear, generally to make themselves look sexually attractive to men. I feel repulsed at the thought of my five-year-old sullying her gorgeous skin with this slap.

You know what, whichever poster pointed out the comparison with those kiddy high heels is right - it is the same principle, so in theory I should ban those too. But it's too late for that, and you have to draw the line somewhere, so that's where I've drawn it.

I'm just amazed the other mum didn't think it was at all controversial.
To answer talkingnonsense, I very much doubt the boys got the same.

Well I'd have been more than dismayed by this. Still it's one more thing to get me over the disappointment that I'll never have a girl make me grateful I have boys!

my 5 year old ds is fascinated when i put makeup on (a rarity, its probably the novelty value!), i think he likes seeing "differences" - he comments out of the blue if i tie my hair up/wear something other than jeans/put on a nice necklace too.

i don't have a girl, but i would feel uncomfortable (i think) with makeup at age 5. I do associate makeup with teenage years, burgeoning sexuality, thinking about improving appearances for attraction etc, as i wasn't allowed any makeup until i was about 14 so its part of the "rite of passage" memories for me - so that sexual association would make me feel uncomfortable about a little girl having makeup. i would prefer her to makedo with a princess dress and a sparkly wand for a few more years yet!! there is plenty of "dressing up" they can do, without needing makeup involved.

YANBU. I'd have been none too pleased had my (almost) 5 year old come home from a party with that bag. She's been begging for months for me to let her have nail polish and I absolutely won't. She has the whole of her adult life to be indulging in such things - I just want to keep her a little girl for a bit longer please!

Personally, I'd be dismayed to the point of depression (unless the boys at the party got make-up too, I suppose, but that's probably a whole other discussion) but I think we're swimming against the tide here!

YABU. Both my 2YO DS and 4YO DD love it when i put their sparkly nail polish on them. I don't consider it make-up. More like dress-up.

I actually very rarely wear makeup. But I wouldnt have a problem with my dd having it to play dressing up with. My dd and ds had a makeup set off a magzine once and ended up giving each other tatoos

YANBU - I probably would have chucked it out before she got it all over the sofa.

I bought my four year old dd clear lip gloss and my two year old ds brill cream as he was jealous of my dd having her hair plaited and wanted to feel special too.

I think concealer and foundation, eyeshadow, coloured lipstick/gloss, and garish nail varnish unreasonable for under mid teens.

But a plain lip gloss and sparkly clear nail varnish mini pot not that bad for play around the house. It makes them feel important and my dss love play makeup as much as my dd, she only wears lipgloss in the house. And has only had clear sparkly stuff on her nails at the hairdressers when i'm getting a colour but so has my ds.

Also it was in party bag no big deal just let her know your rules yes, as its a gift otherwise I don't approve shes 5 and old enough to understand.

YANBU.

As this thread shows, this is one of those topics that divide opinion and as such I think it's better to stay on the side of caution and not put something like that in a party bag.

I do not wear make up and rarely paint my nails but my DD loves to dress up and be girly. Everytime we go into John Lewis she has some lipstick put on her by the girls at the Chanel counter. She loves it, sits on a stool whilst they do it and then admires herself after. She's only 4. It was never my idea, she asked them and it's continued from there, I like to indulge her I think, as do the girls who fuss over her. I only go in there from time to time and she does love it. I paint her nails for her for special occassions and she sits very still until dry, she loves it. As a general rule though she never wears make up, just the usual tiaras, dresses etc around the house. I did buy her some sparkly lip balm from Clare's for her birthday but her younger brother drew on the wall with it within 24 hrs and it had to disappear She also had some lip gloss in a party bag at a friends 4th birthday. I didn't know it was there until I looked in my rear view mirror at her whilst driving home and she'd smeared it all over her face I now check what's in party bags and remove if I'm not entirely happy I do think there is a big divided opinion on subjects like this though. I personally wouldn't put any in a party bag, as someone else said upthread before me.

My what a complete ramble my post is... No wonder I do not usually venture into AIBU I cannot type a remotely succinct reply

YABU - and IMO you are also being a drama queen by comparing it to 'kiddy bras'.

Let her have the make up, and let her put it on herself. She will look so ridiculous there is no way anybody will think it's a 5 year old wearing make up - just a 5 year old playing at dressing up.

I don't mind the nailpolish; my SILs used to paint DS's nails when he was about 2 and he loved it. But then come to think of it it's my furniture and carpets at risk, so perhaps I would mind someone's giving my child an entire bottle of the stuff. It's bad enough when pots of bubble mixture end up everywhere.

YABU... its PLAY. If it were a voucher for botox or something more 'grown-up' I'd join you in your horror, but lip gloss is fine imo, as is a little polish.

I have 2 ds's, but ... having just returned from a week camping, many many young girls, aged 3-10 had their toe nails painted. I would go as far as saying that the majority of the girls had toenails painted. And thta was sleepy Dorset !!
The bra comparsion was ridiculous.
Like every other thing you get on a party bag, just take it out. some parents hate plastic tat.some parents won't let their kids have chocolate. if it comes in a bag, take it out, don't let your child have it. job done. and quit complaining.

I don't get this whole 'make up is to make you sexually attractive to men' argument. Sure, its PART of what a woman does to attract a male, but its also done purely because some of us like painting ourselves, for ourselves. I'd say I wear more make up when going over to my mate's houses for girls nights in than I'd ever do to go out.

I think its sad to over sexualise children, of course, but I also think its sad that we go so far the other way that even dressing up as a princess (fairytale or modern) is considered 'wrong' in some way. I used to love my mum's 'clippy cloppy' heels as a small child, my teens were spent as a tom boy, I hit 30 and discovered pink was actually pretty nice, as were sparkles... I have to be careful not to over do it though, not because I'm over sexualising, but because Barbara Cartland isn't a good look.

YANBU - not OK for a party bag. Neither is the girl/boy party bag thing either. Give em all some plastic tat and some sweets.

It's a parents decision to let their young DC wear make-up not a party throwers.

It's an amazing coincidence that the makeup we apply purely because we like painting ourselves mimics the signs of sexual arousal (increased blood flow to lips, eyes darkening through pupil dilation, flushed cheeks), though. It's not as though we are painting flowers on our cheeks or making ourselves up as butterflies or in nice tartan patterns.

I wouldn't be concerned by it but if the 'Pink Stinks' campaign hits home with you then I can see how it would bother you I suppose. My daughter often asks me to paint her toenails for her (she's 7) and has for at least the last 2 years. I can't really expect her not to want to do things that I do.

YANBU

what do people think about fake tattoos on kids?

YANBU. I wouldn't like it either

YANBU.

I wear nail polish as I'm the adult. DD will be allowed to wear it when I say so, it's not appropriate for another parent to give it to a young child.