For the purposes of background information, I have a very hysterical family. The kind of family that rings your mobile fifty times if you don't pick up first time. I am the worst of the bunch in this respect, by a mile.
Dh and his friends arranged to play golf last Saturday, and decided to make a night of it, staying over and going out. It had been arranged since May. He invited my Dad to play golf, but I think felt a bit awkward because he didn't really want him to go on the night out. Although I am sure my Dad wouldn't have wanted to go on the night out, it meant that dh felt awkward talking to him about it, because obviously my Dad would have to make his own way there and back.
By Thursday he still hadn't contacted my Dad to firm up the arrangements, and we were just in the kitchen discussing it, when my Mum rang and asked what was going on, as my Dad hadn't heard. I clarified with my Mum that Dad wouldn't want to go on the night out, would he (?) and she said no, and I told him that dh would ring him on Friday. On Friday, we had dh's friend to stay, and we both completely forgot that dh was supposed to ring my Dad. I was really pissed off with dh for not ringing him, and dh knew that.
Anyway, I rang my Dad at 8am, and told him the arrangements, he sounded perfectly happy, they were to meet at 10am. My dad had been told months ago what course they were playing etc, but I gave him the address, my Dad does not have a satnav, but he drives about every day for work.
Dh then rang me at 10.05am, saying your Dad hasn't turned up, can I get his mobile number. Dh rang him, but it was going to voicemail. At 10.10am, I rang my Mum, who was at home, and she said he hadn't taken his mobile. At first, she was all, 'God, how stupid, I can't believe he hasn't taken it.' At 10.20am, I rang her back, and she asked if he had arrived, and i said no, and gave a really nervous laugh. She said, 'Well, it's not bloody funny, Jenny, he could have been in accident, and why didn't your bloody dh ring him to arrange this last week?' I replied that I had spoken to my Dad this morning, but that I wasn't really sure that was the issue, why hadn't he just taken his phone?' She replied that it wasn't my Dad's fault (I never said it was), and that I should ring her if I heard anything. I wasn't actually that worried at this point, I just tought maybe he had decided to play a round by himself. But as it got to 12pm, then 1pm, I was absolutely frantic. I didn't ring my Mum, a) because she had started shouting at me, and b) because I had nothing to tell her, dh was still confirming that the hadn't seen him.
At 2.20pm, four hours after he was supposed to meet dh, and I was at home with the dc, imagining all kinds, I get a text from my Mum - she was supposed to be babysitting on Saturday night and I was going for a meal, which I had long cancelled, as I was completely freaking about my Dad - the texts went like this:
Mum: Let me know what time I need to be there tonight
Me: I'm not going, until we find my Dad I'm not committing to anything!
Mum: As I'm sure you know, Dad has been home for four hours
Me: How the hell would I know that?
Mum: All you had to do was ring the house, obviously not that bothered, are you?
I was absolutely furious, and so relieved i burst into tears. I haven't heard from her since, and we normally speak 4/5 times a day, so she obviously isn't speaking to me.
She has form for falling out with me in times of stress, she did it after ds was born, as she met us at the hospital when I was in full blown labour to pick up dd, and because I told her to shut up (I delivered 20 minutes later), she didn't speak to me for a week. I am an only child, and I feel it very acutely when she does this, she forgets that she still has her sister and my Nan.
So, AIBU?