for taking DH's absolute inabilty to choose me a nice present so bloody personally and not faking gratitude

[halohasslipped]

Dh has just landed after being away for a while. Beautiful clothes for DC's and a travel toiletry bag for me. Having told him about a month ago that i hate his toiletry bag as it's so cumbersome to pack i feel so gutted. I REALLY wasn't expecting anything, so knowing he went out and then got something so wrong really upsets me. You still have to put stuff in plastic bags anyway before you put it in so it renders it all pretty useless and it was quite expensive.

He's upset and i'm upset and i feel like such a bitch because i failed to lie and pretend i like it.

I can see where you're coming from OP.

You said 'putting all you toiletries in one bag is a bit of a shit idea.'

DH buys a toiletry bag.

I can understand you being upset that he didn't listen to you, but look at it from the other angle. You're brushing your teeth/looking on MN/doing a cartwheel while your DH is packing and muttering something about a toiletry bag. You go off on your trip, think 'ooh, he was wittering on about the toiletry bag, I'll get him a nice one'. It's one of those conversations where you could be forgiven for only half listening and getting the wrong end of the stick.

If he is generally more attentive and just slipped up this once, I'd apologise and get him a mars bar or something. If this is a symptom of a bigger problem, you really need to talk to him about it.

Fifitrixibelle, Ah come on, I can't win Fifi Bingo until you've told the OP to 'grow up'!

I'm sympathetic to the OP. She's already said she feels terrible, so she's admitted liability, so to speak. She feels flummoxed having told her DH that she hates a particular item to receive one of her own.

Sadly, she is not alone.

I raise your car tool kit, kitchen scales , pastry making course, bejewelled clothing and hoover with a large tan-coloured vinyl suitcase.

OP, I understand what you're saying - it's not so much the present, but the feeling that he doesn't listen to you that hurts, so YANB(V)U.

Ahem, raise all of this with a bunch of plastic Chrysanthemums

helenin, when you say plastic do you actually mean.... plastic?! As opposed to synthetic/fabric (which would be bad enough but possibly understandable in a last-minute-present-buying setting).

LineRunner Plastic. Plastic flowers, plastic stems which I then asked him to cut to 'take up the water' in the vase. Now ex

I agree that plastic chrysanthemums are pretty dire, but worse than a set laminated A4 posters obviously from the pound shop with olde worlde maps on them?

I admit my acting skills were tested to the full on receiving that gift with thanks.

I would quite like a pastry making course.

This year for Christmas I am getting either a new bike or a flash food processor.

He has been sent the links (which have the models etc) almost 5 months in advance and I shall leave it to him to 'surprise' me.

If I was bitching about a toiletries bag DH would hear 'I hate this bag' and probably think getting a new one was a good idea, well he might of 10 years ago. Now he would await further instructions...

Some people suck at presents but if there is other stuff going on then I guess it could be another symptom.

DH claims to have forgotten buying them for me, just like he forgot I hate travelling, maps and tacky A4 posters at the time I suppose

helenina - cut off the stems!

Helenina there is no response to that , Plastic flowers wins it for me
can I ask how long after that was he an ex?

My second ex gave me a stevie wonder album (vinyl) suspiciously like the one I had seen at his ex wives house when we had gone to pick the kids up.
I didnt like Stevie wonder particularly but it could have been worse cos she had a collection of vinyls and I had also seen max bygraves

Sorry, Helenin and Zigzag, I don't think you've topped my vinyl suitcase, because not only must you take into account its hideousness, but also the implicit message that I ought to be going somewhere soon...

I raise all your crap thoughtful gifts with an electric toothbrush and a pair of slippers that my mother thought were too old fashioned

plastic flowers. Now that would have been comedy.

Back in, all is fine, there have even been a couple of jokes. Cooking a nice supper and will even have a cheeky glass of wine to celebrate the family being together again.

Halo, Pleased to hear it, and please try to laugh about this. Unless there are other issues fermenting, you could turn the wash bag into an in-joke for years to come.

Next time simply say, if you're stuck for something on the way back home, it would be great if you could pick up a bottle of champagne or wine for our first meal together again.

Glad you're feeling better OP!

I've actually been thinking I'd really like a nice toiletry bag. I felt a bit down- market walking around a couple of campsites this summer with my washing stuff in a bright orange Sainsbury's plastic bag. But I accept there can be a problem too with throwing it all in together ... DD was very cross when her toothbrush got covered in shower gel, and she refused to use it after that. We got new ones after we got home.

OP - I'm sorry you felt disappointed. Perhaps just say you're sorry, you know some people like them, but you never really got toiletry bags as you've had so many mishaps with lids coming off etc. that you prefer to pack things separately now, and you tried to mention before that that was why you didn't like his one ! Might that help ?

Am enjoying the plastic flowers and laminated A4 posters !
Reminds me of the small paper bag DH gave me for my birthday years ago when we first met - for a joke ?

They had interesting scenes on them ...................

Oh FFS all right, then...

What scenes would those be, Salmotrutta?

Just had a thought - all that crap would fit into the tan vinyl suitcase.

Hahahahha - famous golf courses from around the world

Gotcha!!

Unless they either had Constable paintings or pictures of fruit on them salmo, they'll never come close to the teddy fabric placemats SIL sewed for us one year.

I was privately ungrateful.

All in the tan suitcase they go!

• I'd have been hard pressed to be privately ungrateful. A catsbum face may well have appeared.

Thanks to OP and others for a thread that's made me laugh

Can I still be a contender for the Top crap present award with my small paper bag ? ( It was very small, though admittedly with a purple marbling pattern )

Or wouldn't it truly be a contender anyway as we were just friends at the time ?

So the tan suitcase can be the Room 101 of Crap Presents - that would be quite cathartic and I shall also throw in the fish-shaped, opalescent, decorative thermometer that an old Aunt gave us.