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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

2nd thread of the day sorry but AIBU

55 replies

passingtime · 15/08/2011 12:51

Tp not want to give away one of a litter of kittens to a heavy smoker who smokes indoors?

I think it would be irresponsible of me to do so, knowing the poor kitten will be smoked all over by new owner.....

AIBU and ott?

OP posts:
LolaRennt · 15/08/2011 15:05

vet should know better, but I suspect he finds them exceptionally cute at that time and knows others will too

Original poster
passingtime · 15/08/2011 15:07

DogsBestFriend I think the vet wants to make money off the kittens. I won't be selling them at all I don't want any profit from them, I just want to make sure they will be well looked after wherever they are rehomed to (tempted to keep all 6 at the minute, they are far too cute)

He has said 4 weeks is fine and normal, which I totally disagree with. He has been dp's dogs vet for years and has become a friend.

Friends child is 12, albeit a very young and immature 12.

I am startying to think the rescue route is the best option for these kittens welfare.

I dont think I am being VERY unreasonable here, I was really thinking I might be being a little OTT wrt rehoming to a smoker...

OP posts:
DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 15:08

At the moment there are waiting lists to get kittens and cats into most rescues sadly, narky. That's why folk are told not to wait until the last minute until the cat has had her kittens/the relocation is imminent/the divorce comes through or whathaveyou. However with a bit of luck and good contacts it should be entirely possible to achieve if that's passingtimes wish - if so pt do give me a shout. :)

DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 15:14

"I won't be selling them at all I don't want any profit from them, I just want to make sure they will be well looked after wherever they are rehomed to... "

Just don't tell me that one of them's a tabby boy or I'll be on your doorstep... ! :o

More to the point, I tend to disagree with the "I don't want any money for them" theory purely because IME in rescue folk tend to put more thought - and hopefully more care - into something they're paying for rather than something they get for free. The ones who will take it if it's free don't tend to be the ones who were looking for a kitten anyway.

What I mean is "Oh, lovely, a tabby kitten, free, I'll have one, what's you're address?" as opposed to, "Hmmm... £80...... then there's the vet bills, the neutering, the vax, the wormer, the insurance, the food... do I want to spend that £80 on a kitten or do I want to spend it down the pub on Friday night?"

It's interesting then to see who REALLY wants a kitten and who would just have one as a knee jerk reaction to cuteness but who wouldn't otherwise have considered owning a cat.

evenlessnarkypuffin · 15/08/2011 15:17

You sound lovely PassingTime. I hope it works out for you and the kittens. If more people took the care you're taking there wouldn't be so many un-neutered cats and unwanted kittens around.

Original poster
passingtime · 15/08/2011 15:20

DogsBestFriend there are 2 black and grey tabby's, mum has bengal in her so their bellys look like leopard print. We are not sure if they are male or female yet (only 6 days old) and they look like they are not even real they are so cute!

OP posts:
DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 15:21

Oh stop it!

And your address is... ? :o :o

worraliberty · 15/08/2011 15:26

I agree it's better to charge for them for the reasons DBF gave

And you can always donate the money to a cat rescue or the PDSA or something.

ShoutyHamster · 15/08/2011 15:27

Keep them longer, keep them longer! Even 8 weeks is so young! I thought 12 or 13 weeks was better for the kits, leaving them more secure as adult cats. DogsBestFriend will know better than me though.

Oh and don't give them to the vet. 4 weeks? That's barbaric, and not normal, and he should know that. Way to go for traumatised kittens.

If you don't like the smokers idea, do you have any other friends/family that you can find responsible owners through? Or better still by enlisting the help of a rescue, even if you keep the kits with you til they go?

LordOfTheFlies · 15/08/2011 15:28

DBF step away.
Leave it.
Drop. Grin

ShoutyHamster · 15/08/2011 15:28

Oh and remember to PM DogsBestFriend with a pic of them, just to torture her more Wink

Original poster
passingtime · 15/08/2011 15:38

ShoutyHamster now that is a tempting idea.....Grin

dogsbestfriend you would fall in love with them all. The runt is my favourite (we are keeping that one) all black with a completely white face and a bright pink nose

The downside so far has been that we are currently sleeping on the sofa because the mother chose under our bed as her spot to have the babies and they are so noisy!

OP posts:
DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 15:39

Sod off you lot! You're mean!

I may have my own cats as well two who I've rescued from neglect/having been abandoned and who are on the rehoming list if I can ever find homes which are good enough and can bear to let them go but I still hanker after a tabby.

DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 15:44

"The downside so far has been that we are currently sleeping on the sofa because the mother chose under our bed as her spot to have the babies and they are so noisy!"

Oh bless your heart! :)

The last pregnant queen I took on was a Siamese cross. She took a shine to me and became my shadow, dog-like in her devotion.

So much so that I went to bed one night and she came up and proceeded to give birth on me. I kept moving her gently, trying to get her on the duvet and not my chest or lap but no, she came straight back and plonked herself back on me immediately.

At 4 that morning she gave birth on my duvet, whilst I was still under it and she was laying on my lap, to the first of 5 beautiful babies, each one born on my lap.

Original poster
passingtime · 15/08/2011 15:49

DogsBestFriend that must have been a strange yet quite nice thing to happen!

The mother of the kittens we have is so loving and like a dog too, she licks you like a dog and the other day after speaking to my mum who has cancer I was crying on my bed, she was feeding her babies and got up half way through to come and put her little paw on my face.

God I sound like a crazy cat lady (I am) She would follow me to work if she could, and regularly follows me to the shops

OP posts:
Claw3 · 15/08/2011 15:49

Passing, im Shock at the vet wanting the kittens at 4 weeks, as far as i am aware they are supposed to stay with mum until 12 weeks.

EricNorthmansMistressOfPotions · 15/08/2011 16:02

You should ask for a substantial donation to the local cat rescue place, to put off people who aren't serious. I'd agree with you on not giving to a heavy smoker, BTW, if her house is always full of smoke and stinky.

Besom · 15/08/2011 16:04

In the minority here but yanbu.

One of my main motivations for giving up the fags was because I could smell it off the cat, and I didn't think it was fair. Never admitted this to anyone at the time for fear of the mad cat woman label.

PinotsKittens · 15/08/2011 16:10
NorksAreMessy · 15/08/2011 16:10

passing you have actually made me a little moist in the eye department.

I must just go down the garden and stamp on some dandelions or bend some barbed wire with my teeth and stop being such a softy.

I am with DBF on the 'you value what you pay for' side of the fence. Animals are expensive and not to be taken on lightly. Love that you are sleeping on the sofa, you loon. :)

thefirstMrsDeVere · 15/08/2011 16:17

FOUR WEEKS? Shock

It should be at least double that. Why on earth would the vet want them at four weeks? How could it possibly be in his interests to take on unweaned kittens vunerable to disease and not properly socialized?

Are you sure he said four weeks?

Lorelai · 15/08/2011 16:17

I haven't read the whole thread, so sorry if it has moved on. Someone asked if cats can suffer from passive smoking etc - we had a cat once who had previously been owned by very heavy smokers (we moved into the house after them which is how we 'inherited' the cat - all the ceilings were yellow!). A few years later she developed lung cancer and died :( So yes, I would be wary of giving a kitten to heavy smokers.

thefirstMrsDeVere · 15/08/2011 16:21

My cat was called Daisy and she gave birth on me. She was my cat but I was a kid and my mum never got her animals neutered Hmm

I had another cat called Vermin and she was forever having kittens and she would kill them. It was awful but she never got 'done'.

All my animals are snipped the moment they are old enough. My DS is desperate for a kitten his friend has. He wants it to live with me until he moves in a few month.

I ummmed and ahhhed but eventually agreed on the strict proviso he understands
has to be deflead with a decent flea treatment before it enters this house
He has to get it vaccinated
It MUST be spayed and he has to save for this now
He feeds it and is responsible for vets fees.

I think it will be good for him to take on the responsibiity. I know, I know its a risk but it will be worth it if he does take it all seriously and I think he will.

SnapesMistress · 15/08/2011 16:28

Got to love kitties. I recently had to rehome one of my cats and it took forever to find someone, then I had to actually let go of her! I found her starving a while before so took her in and fed her up but SnapesCat1 was very displeased with the arrangement so I had to put her needs first and say goodbye to SnapesCat2 sob

Claw3 · 15/08/2011 16:33

Pinotskittens, awwww how cute

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