Most women aren't pretty: Julie Burchill

[revolutionscoop]

With apologies in advance for linking to the DailyHeil;
www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2024655/Face-ladies-NEVER-pretty.html
AIBU in thinking Burchill's got a point?

[twinklypearls]

I agree I think protestations that they can't be beautiful because they are a bit of a bitch is just a way for fellow uglies to make themselves feel better.

[TheBigJessie]

Do you think Julie got copy approval before they printed it?

[Wamster]

Maybe, twinklypearls, that may have some truth in it.

I actually think the view that beauty is a physical thing more honest and more human than the 'everybody is beautiful' line, anyway.

Not everybody is beautiful; it is rare, but there are other things that matter in life and , if not beautiful, people can focus on those instead on wasting time on trying to be something they are not. That's not an excuse for self-neglect, just accepting that not everybody can look beautiful (no matter what they do), but hey, other things matter.

[twinklypearls]

I agree wamster.

My dp adores me, you only have to be in our company for a few seconds to know that. However he has never told me that I look beautiful or pretty and I value that honesty.

[AmongstWomen]

Funny that this thread pops up today as I was contemplating this just yesterday and I disagree with JB's standpoint.

I was just thinking yesterday how even the most unconventionally attractive person can suddenly seem really attractive based on their facial expressions and the way they communicate with you. I was thinking this in a work meeting with three women, none of whom would turn your head in the street. But they were all really, really clever, accomplished, interesting women and the longer I was in their presence the more I was bowled over by their attractiveness. I also noticed things about each woman's appearance that made them attractive, but these were things you would have to observe for a bit to see the beauty in them (e.g. you might not look at them for five seconds and say 'wow, she's a stunner'). One had really amazing skin - very, very dark skinned black woman and her skin was so clear, it was beautiful. Another had amazing, twinkly blue eyes and a great laugh. I could instantly see why someone would find her irresistible.

Btw, I am straight, but was obviously having a bit of a 'lipstick-lezzer day' (as my lesbian mate would say!).

Most of us aren't gorgeous in a photo, but many of us are hot when you get to know us I know it can sound trite and corny, but beauty really isn't all about perfection and youth and conventional, male-led ideas of femininity.

[AmongstWomen]

...not that it matters a huge deal. The older I get, the less bothered I am about being seen as attractive.

[messymammy]

We are all rides, Julie Burchill is a rotser,that is that :o

[carminagoesprimal]

Agree Wamster; I couldn't have sex with someone I found physically unattractive, no matter how lovely their personality was - Likewise, I could have sex with someone beautiful even if they were a complete bastard...

[Wamster]

I don't always see that beauty and attractiveness go hand in hand, though.

I've been told by men that they can find a woman beautiful but not sexually attractive yet a woman who has features that are 'off' i.e. wonky nosed, bit too much in the hip dept are sexually attractive.

Just think that beauty is an unusual thing that need have nothing to do with sex appeal.

[carminagoesprimal]

Yes completely agree - substitute 'beautiful' for 'sexually attractive' -
& as for my dh, supermodels do nothing for him at all - he admits they're lovely but thinks they're 'boring' - this is a man who had a mega crush on Miss Jones from Rising Damp - it's personal taste isn't it.

[twinklypearls]

Sex is an expression of love, my dp has sex with me because he loves me and we do have a very active sex life so it is not something he does under sufferance. I agree I would not have a one night stand with someone I did not find attractive. However in a long term relationship it is not about that so despite the fact that I am ugly we have sex. I think I am sexually attractive if that makes sense but just not pretty.

[Wamster]

I think that Brad Pitt is an incredibly handsome man, but I actually fancy Gene Hunt from Life On Mars and lots of other non-handsome men. So I guess, to me, looks and sex appeal do not always go hand in hand.

[twinklypearls]

I could take both personally.

[BulletWithAName]

I've been told by men that they can find a woman beautiful but not sexually attractive yet a woman who has features that are 'off' i.e. wonky nosed, bit too much in the hip dept are sexually attractive.

Just think that beauty is an unusual thing that need have nothing to do with sex appeal.

100% agree with this. I definitely think someone can be beautiful, without being sexy, and vice versa- the two are definitely not mutually exclusive together.

[luvviemum]

She has certainly created a debate.

Someone once said that there is no such thing as an ugly woman, only a lazy one. I think I scrub up pretty well when I'm relaxed, happy, made up and dressed up. I reckon I can still work it but at 40, I also think I look rough as boots sometimes when I'm knackered, stressed, hung over etc. Every late night shows on my face in a way it didn't used to.

Personally, I think it's important to make an effort to look and feel the best you can. Of course a weekend at Champneys won't turn you into Cindy Crawford but it'll make you feel pretty damned relaxed and that will have an effect on your external appearance too.

What are you supposed to do? Just give up on yourself? No thanks. I'm not after looking 25 again but I have every intention of keeping a pride in my appearance and striving to be the best I can be always.

[RufusTFirefly]

I could eat alphabetti spaghetti and shit better articles than she writes.

[twinklypearls]

I haven't given up on myself, I love clothes, I go to the beauty salon etc. But I know what I could spend a decade in Champneys and I would still come out ugly. I do value relaxation time which is how I see trips to the salon.

[MsAnnThroppy]

Good one, Rufus

I just remembered I read a JB book years ago, which I think was called "Ambition", and the journo protagonist was clearly based on her idea of herself. She kept going on about having long dark hair, long legs and being almost beautiful. I guess she has a high opinion of herself and that confidence has kept her in work, even if she does write complete tripe.

[babyhammock]

What a load of old bollox she writes.

AmongstWomen view sums it up for me. Conventionally beautiful in a photo type way can be alot less attractive than someone not so good in photo when you're around them in real life.

Being happy, mannerisms, attitude and being healthy and vibrant are what make women beautiful to me.

Have to say that 'I used to be a looker' comment did make me larf!!!!

And if she's so against 'trying' to be pretty why she's bothering with lipstick etc in her posey photo.

[twinklypearls]

I wear makeup because I look better with it on, it doesn't mean I am trying to be pretty.

Surely being happy, having nice manners and good health makes you happy with nice manners and good health, not beautiful.