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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To sell my eggs in the US?

40 replies

EggSeller · 08/08/2011 13:30

Have name changed as I know people in RL and don't want them knowing my plans.

Anyway, I have student debt (overdrafts, loan, student loan) that I'm struggling to pay. I have a good job, as does DP, but the cost of living (London) is horrendous and we're struggling to pay the debt.

I am looking into selling my eggs in the United States. Having contacted some agencies, I think I would be able to get around $10,000 plus expenses (flights, accommodation etc) for a one-off donation. In order to go out there for around 4 weeks (which I believe is the necessary time frame for the process, from the first medication to the harvesting of the eggs), I'd take holiday from work.

So, I'd make approximately £7000 which would be amazing - I could pay off both overdrafts and a chunk from my loan.

But, DP is anxious and friends are warning me not to do it. I think that it's the best plan to get out of debt and any health risks are minimal. I'm in my late 20s now, so need to get on with it as obviously my eggs are ageing.

AIBU to consider this? Or is this the best way forward?

OP posts:
LolaRennt · 08/08/2011 13:31

Do you already have children, I belive the drugs can have an adverse affect on your natural fertility in the future.

lachesis · 08/08/2011 13:33

Do you have children already? Because I honestly think people who do not already have them should not be allowed to sell or donate eggs. Before I had any, I might have considered it. But having had them, my perspective changed entirely and I would have been gutted had I donated before this.

Don't do it.

They downplay the health risks, too, to get people in. It's exploitive of people in a bad position, it's a morally bankrupt and disgusting practice, IMO, a step ahead of selling organs.

LolaRennt · 08/08/2011 13:33

By the way, I am not judging, but I do think egg donation should be an altruistirc act. I think selling eggs is kind of dodgy territory. I have 2 kidneys and only need one. But I don't think there should be financial reward for me giving one away.

Bandwithering · 08/08/2011 13:34

Can they store some for YOU? Do you have children already?

I think Paul merton said something about blaming the ovary stimulation drugs for his wife's cancer. To be honest, I wouldn't do it to pay off a loan. maybe to fund a child's operation or something.

Sounds to good to be true and it probably is.

lachesis · 08/08/2011 13:35

I agree with Lola. The sale of tissues is an immoral and exploitive practice, IMO.

Nancy66 · 08/08/2011 13:36

If you go to a reputable clinic you will be fine and the risks are tiny.

You need to check what the legal situation is in the US - whether it's anonymous or traceable donation. ie - could any child contact you in 18 years time - you would have no legal/ financial obligation to that child but it's something to think about.

You can donate eggs if you are childless and it is extremely unlikely to affect your own fertility

lachesis · 08/08/2011 13:37

There are risks and people will tell you otherwise to get you hooked in.

AngelDelightIsFab · 08/08/2011 13:38

I dunno. Do you plan on having children yourself someday? If so, you may be haunted by the thought of 'other' children you have in the world....esp. as you hold your own. Think about it carefully. Today's financial woes are only temporary, but to bring a child into this world is until the day you die. You will always think of 'them'. You will always wonder.

Original poster
EggSeller · 08/08/2011 13:38

I already have DD but want more children. From what I understood, the methods they use to harvest the eggs is exactly the same as if you were to embark on IVF - same hormones, same over-stimulation of overies.

In terms of altruism, it's obviously nice to help people, but my objective is the financial side. I honestly can't see a way to raise the same amount of money (well, porn or something but don't want to do that) whilst keeping my job.

OP posts:
BranchingOut · 08/08/2011 13:40

I can see that it seems to be the logical solution to your problems, but I think that you are probably viewing it as a purely mechanical process - you give the eggs, clear your debts, job done.

Yet there is more to it than that - a human life is being created.

Please search on here for egg donation and read a thread with the words 'tree range eggs' in the title. This is an amazing thread all about someone who donated altruistically. However, I was astonished at how in-depth the process was and far more was involved than I had previously imagined it to be.

EricNorthmansMistressOfPotions · 08/08/2011 13:40

Sounds tempting doesn't it...but could you really live knwoing there was a biological offspring of yours in the world? Possibly several? I couldn't...I'd only consider donating eggs if I was enabling a much loved friend to have a child in the process, not for money. Money isn't everything...put away £116 a month and you'll have £7k in 5 years...

rogersmellyonthetelly · 08/08/2011 13:44

I looked at this with a view to egg sharing for ivf- I was intested in donating to reduce the costs. All the reputable clinics I looked at would only do egg donation for us citizens.

reddypeas · 08/08/2011 13:47

I think it's your right to do what you like with your body so I don't see any problems with it.

I don't think I'd do it myself, because I wouldn't like the idea of my genetic children being out there, in the way that AngelDelight mentions. But then I don't think I'd do it for altruistic reasons either, I would want to be able to raise any child I bring into the world.

There are some risks associated with egg donation as well - statistically very small, but nevertheless, I wouldn't want to take that risk as my child could be left without a mother.

thesortinghat · 08/08/2011 13:48

Don't the dc born from egg/sperm donation now have the legal right to know the identity of their biological parents? That may be worth considering op.

PerAr6ua · 08/08/2011 13:49

So I'm the only person who looked at the title and wondered why it wasn't in chicken keepers? Blush

I'd go for it if you can cope with the biological offspring impact - and if you're also prepared for the side-effects of the drugs - and they'll give you proper medical insurancein case anything goes wrong as a result of the drugs/harvesting. It's a lot to think about though...

londonone · 08/08/2011 13:52

you probably can't due to living in the UK and BSE. FDA has guidelines preventing tissue donation from people who have been reswident in several european countries including GB

Original poster
EggSeller · 08/08/2011 14:00

I don't mind that there would be genetic children of mine out there - nor would I mind if they did track me down in the future.

I'm trying to determine the legalities of egg donation from a UK citizen in the United States.

OP posts:
pinkthechaffinch · 08/08/2011 14:05

I feel the same as ericnorthman'smistress, I could'nt bear the thought of some of my babies growing up somewhere without me.

Original poster
EggSeller · 08/08/2011 14:13

But they wouldn't be my babies - we'd just share genetics.

Does anyone know of people who have donated in the US or anywhere where receiving payment is legal? Could you possibly point them over to this thread?

Or anyone that has donated eggs in this country and could share their experiences?

OP posts:
Riveninside · 08/08/2011 14:17

Yanbu op. If i wasnt so ancient id seriously consider it. My eggs are just cells to me, not babies.
Good luck OP

Original poster
EggSeller · 08/08/2011 14:21

Thank you Riveninside. I can't say I'm attached to my eggs in any way - I have quite a few of them and I think it's very different to give one's eggs away as opposed to giving away a baby for adoption or suchlike.

I've not made my mind up 100% but if the agency that I'm dealing with does match me to someone, I really can't think of a good reason not to donate and get paid. The debt is just too great and I worry so much about repaying it.

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 08/08/2011 14:23

If you donate in the Uk then you get expenses only - £400 at most. if your motives are financial then it's really not worth it.

in Greece, Czech Republic, Cyprus, South Africa donors can be paid for their eggs but it would not be as much as you've been quoted in the States - more like £1500

In the US it's treated very much as a business - the better looking you are, the more educated you are the more your eggs are worth.

I wouldn't have thought there would be an issue with you donating your eggs in the US as a non citizen.

IndigoBell · 08/08/2011 14:37

YANBU.

It won't be your baby.

It's a serious amount of money - and therefore is worth doing.

Hope it all works out for you, and you make some good money.

hermioneweasley · 08/08/2011 14:51

I'd go for it. You'll be helping another couple make a much wanted family, and helping your own by reducing debts. I don't understand all this attachment to genetic material.

DoMeDon · 08/08/2011 14:56

YANBU to consider it if you are seriously in debt. If you reserach the facts and risks then feel ready to do it, go for it.

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