To nearly have a heart attack at the frape on my daughters facebook

[scotchmist]

DD 19 going into 3rd year at uni in september, living away from home and working full time over the summer to pay for her digs, i keep in touch by text, phone and facebook, just loged onto my FB and her FB status said, 6 weeks pregnant :) it was posted about an hour ago and there were 15 likes, i phoned her right away and apparently her boyfreinds freind facebook raped her when she was having a shower and she didnt know, she burst out laughing but im failing to see the funny side, anyone got a valium.

God I loathe that word.

I came down like an absolute tonne of bricks when she said that in the context of FB hijack. It is absolutely VILE.

I don't know the word frape.

The situation sounds extremely frightening - I don't know how to advise you knowing so little about you and your daughter, because it is probably too complicated to get across in a short post. I would recommend talking to the daughter or close friends or family immediately. Sorry I can't help further.

Your poor daughter-this kind of thing is really common is with iPhones and similar you dont even have to in, so it's easy for someone to write a status if you put your phone down even for a minute. This is one of the many reasons why I don't think parents and kids should be fb friends....far too much chance of embarrassment for all involved!

Why is everyone so upset? Foul language is used all over mn but this bothers you all?
I'm sure I have a bottle of rape oil in my kitchen

We have fields of the stuff all round every year.
OP, I think your daughter and her friends all find it hilarious, and pretty much an everyday thing. Once she is at Uni she will learn never to leave her computer logged on.
Glad it's not true, for both of you.

Sorry, see she is at Uni- caught off guard then :)

The OP has apologised for offence caused.

I hate the term too. And I hate these kind of games on FB. Bleaugh.

OP
Perhaps you could ask MN to alter the thread title, otherwise you are going to have hundreds of posts berating you for something that you have already apologised for.

Well rape the plant is from a different origin so maybe that's OK I don't know! I just don't think a word shouldn't be used because one meaning of it is a disgusting act. Hijack is a perfect example of another word used in both trivial and very serious situations yet it is considered OK and not offensive. Maybe it's because hijacking in the serious sense is not so common as rape or doesn't tend to effect vastly more women than men.

But rape isn't used in trivial situations. And shouldn't be. It's used as a noun for one plant. But it should not be used to describe the harmless act of someone using your account without your permission. 1 woman is raped every nine minutes, yet we find it acceptable to trivialise such common attacks, by applying the name to an act of tomfoolery. Why is that?

I'm sorry, but using a word in such a trivial manner demeans the very real and terrifying meaning of the word when used to describe the act of rape. It minimises it. I'd rather the shock value of the word stayed there.

If you think the use of hijack is offensive, why not find another term to use, which isn't likely to offend?

But it ISN'T trivialising it imo. Using the word in a trivial situation isn't demeaning or minimising the seriousness of rape as a sexual assault.
Do you think that saying 'sorry for hijacking your post' is trivialising aircraft hijack?

And the point I was making is that I DON'T find 'hijack' offensive and neither would most people. So why is rape different?

i dont think its fair to have a go at op for saying frape, thats the word used for it, its not like she made it up herself

I also think that quoting rape stats is an emotive red herring on your part. I am only too aware of the devastating effect of rape. I just don't agree that using the alternate meaning of the same word is trivialising it.

This blog sums up everything I feel about "frape" Just typing the word makes me shudder.

oh crikey...OP what have you done the peace that was mumsnet? You responsible for this so thought i would add some more in..

Anyways.. I really don't think the OP meant to offend anyone with the words she used. Frape is used nationwide to describe when someone hijacks your facebook status, the OP is getting a really hard time for no reason here.

so shut it and pick on someone else

everyone is up in arms about ... a very common expression among younger facebook uses, perhaps all facebook users.

tis just a word

my god i have just seen a Thread about this.

to coin a phrase

I dont believe it

Not picking on OP, I'm just curious about how anyone can deem it acceptable.

When I see a word I deem unacceptable, I will challenge it. I always have done.

Slarty, I'm not sure how the word rape can be appropriated for a FB status hijack.

Why not fhijacked? Instead of fraped?

frape.

did a woman come up with this fashionable word? I doubt it. Would it be promoted by any woman? I really hope not. Utterly vile.

Please MN can we have a separate topic for anything related to FB!!

I hate the word as well, in fact i hate FB full stop, its evil.

Dont be so dramatic and ridiculous, its only a social network site and a way of communicating with other people at the end of the day, its hardly the work of the devil.

To describe something as "fucking disgusting" isn't really making a good point to be honest, that's disgusting in itself surely? The OP has repeatly apologised, for goodness sake, stop.

and time to delete thread I think and also the thread about this thread :)